Have a rant thread

[Bruce Spanner]

12 minutes ago, Captain Turdseye said:

Mine like talking. They like talking a lot. When we go out to eat anywhere they just sit and engage me in conversation. A lot. Talking loads. Loads of talking. 
 

 

*exhales*

My four year old asked 94 questions on a one hour car drive the other week, I counted.

 

Every one prefixed with ‘dada’ as my wife has selective hearing…

[Bjornebye]

20 minutes ago, Preston Red said:

 

3:33: The treatment that should be handed out to screaming unruly brats in restaurants. 

Hahahaha what sort of youtube vacuum were you in to come across that?! 

[Preston Red]

56 minutes ago, Bjornebye said:

Hahahaha what sort of youtube vacuum were you in to come across that?! 

I first saw that on Twitter a couple of years ago. Ugandan Commando is even better hahaha.

 

*heads off to find Ugandan Commando*

[Preston Red]

1 hour ago, Bjornebye said:

Hahahaha what sort of youtube vacuum were you in to come across that?! 

 

[sir roger]

1 hour ago, Bruce Spanner said:

My four year old asked 94 questions on a one hour car drive the other week, I counted.

 

Every one prefixed with ‘dada’ as my wife has selective hearing…

Was the first one

 

Dada , did Jarg Hispalis' AI manager really play Virgil as a Defensive Midfielder ?

[Bjornebye]

Superb randomness 

 

“tiger mafia!”

[Evelyn Tentions]

9 hours ago, Bruce Spanner said:

My four year old asked 94 questions on a one hour car drive the other week, I counted.

 

Every one prefixed with ‘dada’ as my wife has selective hearing…

58 of them were "Dada, are we there yet"

[Karl_b]

10 hours ago, Bruce Spanner said:

My four year old asked 94 questions on a one hour car drive the other week, I counted.

 

Every one prefixed with ‘dada’ as my wife has selective hearing…

Dada, important left-wing movement that espoused anti-capitalist ideas, or just a bit silly?

[Paulie Dangerously]

9 hours ago, sir roger said:

Was the first one

 

Dada , did Jarg Hispalis' AI manager really play Virgil as a Defensive Midfielder ?

"Dada, why did people vote for Brexit without considering the wider implications of the employment market and the supply chain?" 

[VladimirIlyich]

10 hours ago, sir roger said:

Was the first one

 

Dada , did Jarg Hispalis' AI manager really play Virgil as a Defensive Midfielder ?

Who or what is Jarg Hispalis?

[VERBAL DIARRHEA]

23 minutes ago, VladimirIlyich said:

Who or what is Jarg Hispalis?

Real Betis on FM?

[Elite]

11 hours ago, Preston Red said:

 

Outstanding.

 

Better than Rambo.

 

I'm deffo in that wormhole now, here's an extended version.

 

 

 

 

[sir roger]

43 minutes ago, VladimirIlyich said:

Who or what is Jarg Hispalis?

Sorry VI , it was a gag abou the football draft that Bruce put his life on hold for.

[Total Longo]

12 hours ago, Bruce Spanner said:

My four year old asked 94 questions on a one hour car drive the other week, I counted.

 

Every one prefixed with ‘dada’ as my wife has selective hearing…

Maybe your four year old just has an interest in early 20th century, avant-garde, art movements? Maybe they are simply rejecting artistic and cultural authority. Did you stop to think about that?

[Bruce Spanner]

3 minutes ago, Total Longo said:

Maybe your four year old just has an interest in early 20th century, avant-garde, art movements? Maybe they are simply rejecting artistic and cultural authority. Did you stop to think about that?

Very good!

 

She’s more Tachism though at present.

[Bjornebye]

"Dada put the air-con on or I'm gonna shit all over the leather" 

[Total Longo]

2 minutes ago, Bruce Spanner said:

Very good!

 

She’s more Tachism though at present.

When they were toddlers, my kids used to express themselves with some quite outstanding vomit based art.  

[Bruce Spanner]

7 minutes ago, Total Longo said:

When they were toddlers, my kids used to express themselves with some quite outstanding vomit based art.  

G G Allin would be proud.

[YorkshireRed]

Three doors up are having all the trees chopped down in their garden.
 

I’m annoyed at this on two counts:

 

1. I’m a big fan of trees.

 

2. The racket is impacting my Olympic Games viewing. 

[Section_31]

Went to drop some decent stuff off at a charity shop before, first one said we'd have to book an appointment next week (an appointment to give them consumer goods to sell) so we fucked it off and went to the one next door who literally said 'oh no not donations, we're not taking donations'. We drove further afield and found one that'd take the stuff.

 

Between this, the charity chugger cunts they employ to harass you in the street, the fact they employ people like David Miliband on Megabucks, plus the fact most charities whose help you ever try to get are largely shite anyway (mental health charities are great at producing pamphlets but not actually any good at supporting mental health) they can get fucked.

[Kepler-186]

21 minutes ago, Section_31 said:

Went to drop some decent stuff off at a charity shop before, first one said we'd have to book an appointment next week (an appointment to give them consumer goods to sell) so we fucked it off and went to the one next door who literally said 'oh no not donations, we're not taking donations'. We drove further afield and found one that'd take the stuff.

 

Between this, the charity chugger cunts they employ to harass you in the street, the fact they employ people like David Miliband on Megabucks, plus the fact most charities whose help you ever try to get are largely shite anyway (mental health charities are great at producing pamphlets but not actually any good at supporting mental health) they can get fucked.

All charities should be based out of London thus saving on extortionate rent, wages, and helping provincial office space get filled. Won’t happen though, the arts programmes can’t compare, dear. 

[Section_31]

1 minute ago, Kepler-186 said:

All charities should be based out of London thus saving on extortionate rent, wages, and helping provincial office space get filled. Won’t happen though, the arts programmes can’t compare, dear. 

 

Would be interested to know if anyone has ever had any help from a charity. My nan got a chair off the British legion but that's about it. Tried to get my mum some help once from Age UK and they were shite, also to get some support when she was having trouble with my sister form autism UK and they were shite too, to an almost comedy degree. 

 

'hi do you do support groups and or benefits advice?'

 

'no, but we're hosting a speech by an American prof on autism at our big conference at the NEC, subsidised tickets are 45 quid.'

 

Great .

 

[Kepler-186]

3 minutes ago, Section_31 said:

 

Would be interested to know if anyone has ever had any help from a charity. My nan got a chair off the British legion but that's about it. Tried to get my mum some help once from Age UK and they were shite, also to get some support when she was having trouble with my sister form autism UK and they were shite too, to an almost comedy degree. 

 

'hi do you do support groups and or benefits advice?'

 

'no, but we're hosting a speech by an American prof on autism at our big conference at the NEC, subsidised tickets are 45 quid.'

 

Great .

 

Yeah I think there’s a real difference between “charities” and people who do charity work, the latter very often working with no budget, behind the scenes, and quite possibly being the last port of call for people in crisis. The former have marketing budgets and send newsletters out. But hey, shrink the state, Big Society, where’s my cut for lobbying Big Dave Cameron thinks it’s boss. 
Hope you got something sorted in the end, mate. 

[Preston Red]

6 hours ago, Elite said:

Outstanding.

 

Better than Rambo.

 

I'm deffo in that wormhole now, here's an extended version.

 

 

 

 

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

 

That is tremendous! Ugandan Ghetto Air Force!!!

[Bjornebye]

Hahahahahaha "bastard!"