Bullshit You've Fallen For

[Harry Squatter]

When me and my brother were about 12 we went into our local paper shop and there was a big black fella in there with ginger dyed hair called Jaffa. He used to run loads of marathons and looked a big hard bastard especially when you are 12. The lad who lived opposite us was about 18 and came in the shop as Jaffa was leaving.

 

He said "you don't want to mess with him, he says he does the New York marathon every year but really he goes over to New York because he's a street fighter and bare knuckle boxer. He had a bare knuckle fight against Mr T years ago in Brooklyn and he twatted him. Mr T begged Jaffa not to tell anyone as he didn't want it affecting his telly career". Instantly me and my brother believed it and told everyone in school even though it was complete and utter 100 per cent concentrated bullshit.

[VladimirIlyich]

Is this the same Jaffa who was a regular matchgoer during the 80s?

[General Dryness]

Is this the same Jaffa who was a regular matchgoer during the 80s?

 

Yeah, good mates with Mad Ian and Flat Top. I've already explained this.

[VladimirIlyich]

Yeah, good mates with Mad Ian and Flat Top. I've already explained this.

I must have missed that post.

[General Dryness]

I must have missed that post.

 

I can only plant the treasure Vlad, I can't lead you to it as well.

[manwiththestick]

Body by Jake Tower 200.

[General Dryness]

Body by Jake Tower 200.

 

Although to be fair, its only simon thats fallen for that. And he doesn't count.

[Fowlers God]

Lad I work with, told all his mates at school that he wrote Living on a Prayer

[VladimirIlyich]

Lad I work with, told all his mates at school that he wrote Living on a Prayer

You went to school with Jon Bon Jovi?

[Harry Squatter]

My mate told everyone in his year in school that his dad played in goal for Malta before he moved to Liverpool. He said he got sent off in a World Cup qualifier against Holland for calling Johan Cruyff a a gay bastard and punching him in the face.

 

When no one believed him he brought a team photo of a team in all red in a small stadium and everyone then believed him. In reality it was just a Sunday league team who reached a final and had a similar kit to the national team.

[Stu Monty]

Things can only get better.

 

Kind of did though, really.