little things that annoy the shit out of you

[sir roger]

27 minutes ago, easytoslip said:

I remember now it was Richmonds, just over the Lift Bridge on the left opposite the Red Lion. 

I am having Richmond skinless sausages with lean bacon medallions on toast for my brekky this morning.

[easytoslip]

1 hour ago, sir roger said:

I am having Richmond skinless sausages with lean bacon medallions on toast for my brekky this morning.

Sound, might get some myself

The Sausage Factory sounds like a place Andy Warhol would regularly visit. 

When it was derelict, about 72/73 me and the mate was mooching around when this local loner type of lad caught us and asked what are you doing on my patch in the Sausage Factory, he had like a homemade weapon. 

Shit ourselves and legged it when we got the chance. 

 

[Harry's Lad]

5 hours ago, easytoslip said:

Sound, might get some myself

The Sausage Factory sounds like a place Andy Warhol would regularly visit. 

When it was derelict, about 72/73 me and the mate was mooching around when this local loner type of lad caught us and asked what are you doing on my patch in the Sausage Factory, he had like a homemade weapon. 

Shit ourselves and legged it when we got the chance. 

 

Was it his sausage?

[easytoslip]

38 minutes ago, Harry's Lad said:

Was it his sausage?

Haha no thank fuck, it was a gun thing, he'd been seen with it firing it into the canal,looking back maybe he was going to make us do stuff or we'll be shot with it. 

To quick for the cunt anyway but scary when you look back. 

 

[dockers_strike]

8 hours ago, Doctor Troy said:

When driving, people who barge their way out of a road in front of you forcing you to stop or slow down then put their hands up acknowledging you like you've let them out.

 

No mate, I had no fucking choice, it was either slow down or slam on because you're an impatient twat. 

Yeah nearly happened to me at a mini roundabout the other day taking the old girl shopping. Dozy cunt of a woman driving a van and signalling she was coming off at the first exit. Normally I virtually stop at mini roundabouts just in case but the old girl was muttering something so only slowed, aware a car behind was right on my bumper.

 

Next thing the stupid woman is driving across my entry waving like fuck mouthing 'oh sorry!' Yeah you fucking would have been if we'd collided or the cunt behind me went into me!

[Harry's Lad]

18 minutes ago, easytoslip said:

Haha no thank fuck, it was a gun thing, he'd been seen with it firing it into the canal,looking back maybe he was going to make us do stuff or we'll be shot with it. 

To quick for the cunt anyway but scary when you look back. 

 

Very scary to be honest.

Looks like you *cough* dodged a bullet there *cough*.

[easytoslip]

Well yes especially when you learn later on the things that went on sometimes. 

I doubt you could of faced a sausage for ever after, post sausage stress syndrome. 

[johnsusername]

Jack and the Beanstalk. This story is BAD NEWS. Right, so Jack breaks into / is let in by the Maid into a castle (depending on which version you read). Then he hides in a cupboard until the giant falls asleep and robs the giant's golden coins. When him and his mum have spent all that he goes back to the castle and robs his magic hen which lays golden eggs. And then the NEXT DAY goes BACK to the castle, waits for the giant to fall asleep and robs his magical harp! And if that wasn't bad enough, when the giant chases him Jack chops down the beanstalk and kills the giant. Sorry, the 'big, bad giant' (more media propaganda). The maid says he eats English men, but where's the proof? 

 

This shit winds me up. Like Peter Rabbit - every day breaking into Mr McGregor's garden to rob his fruit and veg. Mr McGregor is a hard working farmer and that little shit with his gang of shithead mates Benjamin Button and Lily Bobtail every day legging into next door's garden to thieve and destroy. I know Mr McGregor killed his dad so there's obviously beef there, but sort it out like a man. 

 

No wonder my stress levels are off the charts reading this shit every night! 

[easytoslip]

10 minutes ago, johnsusername said:

Jack and the Beanstalk. This story is BAD NEWS. Right, so Jack breaks into / is let in by the Maid into a castle (depending on which version you read). Then he hides in a cupboard until the giant falls asleep and robs the giant's golden coins. When him and his mum have spent all that he goes back to the castle and robs his magic hen which lays golden eggs. And then the NEXT DAY goes BACK to the castle, waits for the giant to fall asleep and robs his magical harp! And if that wasn't bad enough, when the giant chases him Jack chops down the beanstalk and kills the giant. Sorry, the 'big, bad giant' (more media propaganda). The maid says he eats English men, but where's the proof? 

 

This shit winds me up. Like Peter Rabbit - every day breaking into Mr McGregor's garden to rob his fruit and veg. Mr McGregor is a hard working farmer and that little shit with his gang of shithead mates Benjamin Button and Lily Bobtail every day legging into next door's garden to thieve and destroy. I know Mr McGregor killed his dad so there's obviously beef there, but sort it out like a man. 

 

No wonder my stress levels are off the charts reading this shit every night! 

No offence but I don't actually any of that and what it refers to, are you reading to your kids? 

[johnsusername]

5 minutes ago, easytoslip said:

No offence but I don't actually any of that and what it refers to, are you reading to your kids? 

Haha yea Jack and the Beanstalk every night to the three year old. And she's constantly watching Peter Rabbit. 

[easytoslip]

1 hour ago, johnsusername said:

Haha yea Jack and the Beanstalk every night to the three year old. And she's constantly watching Peter Rabbit. 

Fair play to you, it's got to be done. 

[Evelyn Tentions]

17 hours ago, johnsusername said:

Jack and the Beanstalk. This story is BAD NEWS. Right, so Jack breaks into / is let in by the Maid into a castle (depending on which version you read). Then he hides in a cupboard until the giant falls asleep and robs the giant's golden coins. When him and his mum have spent all that he goes back to the castle and robs his magic hen which lays golden eggs. And then the NEXT DAY goes BACK to the castle, waits for the giant to fall asleep and robs his magical harp! And if that wasn't bad enough, when the giant chases him Jack chops down the beanstalk and kills the giant. Sorry, the 'big, bad giant' (more media propaganda). The maid says he eats English men, but where's the proof? 

 

This shit winds me up. Like Peter Rabbit - every day breaking into Mr McGregor's garden to rob his fruit and veg. Mr McGregor is a hard working farmer and that little shit with his gang of shithead mates Benjamin Button and Lily Bobtail every day legging into next door's garden to thieve and destroy. I know Mr McGregor killed his dad so there's obviously beef there, but sort it out like a man. 

 

No wonder my stress levels are off the charts reading this shit every night! 

Mr Inbetween

 

 

[Mudface]

17 hours ago, johnsusername said:

Jack and the Beanstalk. This story is BAD NEWS. Right, so Jack breaks into / is let in by the Maid into a castle (depending on which version you read). Then he hides in a cupboard until the giant falls asleep and robs the giant's golden coins. When him and his mum have spent all that he goes back to the castle and robs his magic hen which lays golden eggs. And then the NEXT DAY goes BACK to the castle, waits for the giant to fall asleep and robs his magical harp! And if that wasn't bad enough, when the giant chases him Jack chops down the beanstalk and kills the giant. Sorry, the 'big, bad giant' (more media propaganda). The maid says he eats English men, but where's the proof? 

 

This shit winds me up. Like Peter Rabbit - every day breaking into Mr McGregor's garden to rob his fruit and veg. Mr McGregor is a hard working farmer and that little shit with his gang of shithead mates Benjamin Button and Lily Bobtail every day legging into next door's garden to thieve and destroy. I know Mr McGregor killed his dad so there's obviously beef there, but sort it out like a man. 

 

No wonder my stress levels are off the charts reading this shit every night! 

They're just giving it to The Man. Very subversive. 

[johnsusername]

17 hours ago, easytoslip said:

Fair play to you, it's got to be done. 

You read these stories so many times that boredom will be overtaken by pettiness. Like, in the Little Mermaid, how can the merfolk speak underwater? What do they eat? How do they eat? How come they can breathe normally underwater and in the open air? 

 

This is Lockdown madness, it's getting to me.  

[markcd]

21 hours ago, johnsusername said:

Jack and the Beanstalk. This story is BAD NEWS. Right, so Jack breaks into / is let in by the Maid into a castle (depending on which version you read). Then he hides in a cupboard until the giant falls asleep and robs the giant's golden coins. When him and his mum have spent all that he goes back to the castle and robs his magic hen which lays golden eggs. And then the NEXT DAY goes BACK to the castle, waits for the giant to fall asleep and robs his magical harp! And if that wasn't bad enough, when the giant chases him Jack chops down the beanstalk and kills the giant. Sorry, the 'big, bad giant' (more media propaganda). The maid says he eats English men, but where's the proof? 

 

This shit winds me up. Like Peter Rabbit - every day breaking into Mr McGregor's garden to rob his fruit and veg. Mr McGregor is a hard working farmer and that little shit with his gang of shithead mates Benjamin Button and Lily Bobtail every day legging into next door's garden to thieve and destroy. I know Mr McGregor killed his dad so there's obviously beef there, but sort it out like a man. 

 

No wonder my stress levels are off the charts reading this shit every night! 

What about Goldilocks eh? Breaks into some poor bears house, eats all the porridge, breaks the chair, and then when they come home she's asleep in their kids bed like some crackhead burglar. She needs a kicking if you ask me.

[Bjornebye]

In Narcos Steve says when he see's Escobar getting taken in by the police it's the first time he saw him in the flesh but thats not true because he see's him at the hotel with all the other bosses and then in the Hall of Representatives, him and Pena are sat in the gallery watching him get told to fuck off. 

 

 

[Bobby Hundreds]

[YorkshireRed]

People who tell you ‘how they are’ when you ask them ‘how they are?’.

 

Any normal person, particularly those sprinkled with any degree of Britishness, knows that the only acceptable responses to this are;

 

Fine thanks.

 

I’m ok.

 

Good.

 

A reciprocal follow up of “how are you?” is also reasonable and will be answered by one of the above.

 

We are then both free to go about our miserable lives in peace. 

 

Actually telling me your current state of play and forcing me to listen, whilst I’m simultaneously dying inside, is simply not cricket.  

[Bobby Hundreds]

I've never had so much time off in my entire life and rather than use that time usefully, learn something a new skill maybe, improve myself I’ve done absolutely fuck all. I'm absolutely livid with what a cunt I am. I could of invested time in myself. 

[Stouffer]

Web pages that jump about when you're trying to select something. 

 

Grrrr.

[Bjornebye]

2 minutes ago, Stouffer said:

Web pages that jump about when you're trying to select something. 

 

Grrrr.

Does my head right in that. The echo site is the worst for it. 

[Kevin D]

10 minutes ago, Bobby Hundreds said:

I've never had so much time off in my entire life and rather than use that time usefully, learn something a new skill maybe, improve myself I’ve done absolutely fuck all. I'm absolutely livid with what a cunt I am. I could of invested time in myself. 

 

I learned German last year and have completely forgotten it.

[Jairzinho]

Princess Latifa. Don't care. 

[easytoslip]

I bought two packets of dark chocolate digestive biscuits only to get back to find one was milk chocolate, so some cunt must of put the milk ones back with the dark ones, what a ghastly trick to play. 

 

[Harry's Lad]

On 18/02/2021 at 17:50, Bjornebye said:

Does my head right in that. The echo site is the worst for it. 

Yeah, it's a pain in the arse when you're trying to click on the Holly Willoughby fans are going wild about...................... Insert headline about her skirt, blouse, frock etc.