I got some great news yesterday

[zigackly]

I just don't like Graham Norton.

 

Well said.

[Red Soul]

I was the recipient of fantastic news yesterday and thought I would share my happiness with my virtual friends and family on the GF.

 

My ex mother-in-law has been diagnosed with terminal lung cancer.

 

Happy fucking days.

 

Are you serious elmyn?.

[zigackly]

Are you serious elmyn?.

 

Does the pope shit in the woods?

[King Emlyn]

I watched my father in law die of lung cancer, it is the most grotesque things I've ever seen. Fucking brutal.

[Red Soul]

I watched my father in law die of lung cancer, it is the most grotesque things I've ever seen. Fucking brutal.

 

Like most people I wouldn't wish that on anyone.

[lifetime fan]

Are you serious elmyn?.

 

 

Deadly...

[Strontium]

EDIT: thought better of recycling someone else's joke

[lifetime fan]

EDIT: thought better of recycling someone else's joke

 

 

It was mine wasn't it?!

[Jim MM]

Your horoscope for this week:

 

"Something big is coming your way! Unfortunately, it is inoperable."

 

How'd you know that, you a Cancerian as well?

[stevebaby]

I have just sent a little prayer to Jesus asking him to cause your ex MIL excruciating pain.

Hope this helps.

[Remmie]

Hooray your daughter's nan will die and she'll be devastated what a celebration.

[Fowlers God]

No, she's Father Ted

 

In that case she's already dead.

[Elmyn Noos]

I watched my father in law die of lung cancer, it is the most grotesque things I've ever seen. Fucking brutal.

 

I watched my dad die of it. I know what it does. She deserves it.

[Elmyn Noos]

Hooray your daughter's nan will die and she'll be devastated what a celebration.

 

She's not that close to her. She'll be upset, but not devastated. People die, she'll get over it. She only doesn't feel the same way as I do because she doesn't know what a cunt her nan was.

[Harry Squatter]

Can you tell us why she was such a cunt, maybe someone can then do a poll to see whether we think she deserves to die?

[Elmyn Noos]

I could but I'm not sure I can be arsed. People get cancer and its a shit way to go. Whenever someone "nice"gets it, hundreds of fartsniffs feel compelled to go on Facebook making comments like "why do terrible things happen to good people". Well, it's because terrible things happen to everyone. That this truly awful woman has lung cancer merely serves to reinforce the statistical certainty that shit things also happen to right cunts too. It's not karma, it's maths. I'm also tired of hearing people suddenly being afraid to call a cunt a cunt just because they are dead or dying. People around me winced when I heard the news of this woman's cancer and " I feel sorry for those close to her, but then I always have. I hope she suffers because if any cunt deserves it, it's her".

 

She almost certainly puts beans on a fry up, and adds milk to tea before taking the tea bag out of the mug. And she's a Geordie.

[razor]

I could but I'm not sure I can be arsed. People get cancer and its a shit way to go. Whenever someone "nice"gets it, hundreds of fartsniffs feel compelled to go on Facebook making comments like "why do terrible things happen to good people". Well, it's because terrible things happen to everyone. That this truly awful woman has lung cancer merely serves to reinforce the statistical certainty that shit things also happen to right cunts too. It's not karma, it's maths. I'm also tired of hearing people suddenly being afraid to call a cunt a cunt just because they are dead or dying. People around me winced when I heard the news of this woman's cancer and " I feel sorry for those close to her, but then I always have. I hope she suffers because if any cunt deserves it, it's her".

 

She almost certainly puts beans on a fry up, and adds milk to tea before taking the tea bag out of the mug. And she's a Geordie.

 

1970's "Take my mother-in-law for example; I wish somebody would take her...."

 

2010's "Hey, everyone who reads this forum, my mother-in-law has terminal lung cancer. Hahaha!"

 

 

I took it that the Graham Norton reference was about someone wanting to bit risque and close to the edge.

 

Noos, I have laughed at many things you have said. This one, not so much.

[Jairzinho]

I could but I'm not sure I can be arsed. People get cancer and its a shit way to go. Whenever someone "nice"gets it, hundreds of fartsniffs feel compelled to go on Facebook making comments like "why do terrible things happen to good people". Well, it's because terrible things happen to everyone. That this truly awful woman has lung cancer merely serves to reinforce the statistical certainty that shit things also happen to right cunts too. It's not karma, it's maths. I'm also tired of hearing people suddenly being afraid to call a cunt a cunt just because they are dead or dying. People around me winced when I heard the news of this woman's cancer and " I feel sorry for those close to her, but then I always have. I hope she suffers because if any cunt deserves it, it's her".

 

She almost certainly puts beans on a fry up, and adds milk to tea before taking the tea bag out of the mug. And she's a Geordie.

 

I'd like to retract all previous comments in this thread.

[Carvalho Diablo]

Just getting back from the pub and just before I was getting away one of my best mates told me his Ma is in hospital with cancer, prognosis dire with mere days left to live.

 

I was shocked because although I haven't seen either my mate or his Ma for a short while, when I saw her last she looked really well.

 

His Dad died of cancer a few years ago too.

 

Fucking wretched, horrible, twat of a disease. It eats away at people from the inside out; both those who have it, and those who are left behind by it.

[zigackly]

In the time this thread has existed I reckon a fair few people have died.

 

Also, I have had three epic meals of barbecue ribs, shoulder of lamb and a mighty chicken and mince curry.

[TheBitch]

In the time this thread has existed I reckon a fair few people have died.

 

Also' date=' I have had three epic meals of barbecue ribs, shoulder of lamb and a mighty chicken and mince curry.[/quote']

 

In the time this thread has existed I have had sex with 2 women, got drunk twice and got sunburnt.

Neither of the women were Noos mother in law.

[Remmie]

In the time this thread has existed I have had sex with 2 women, got drunk twice and got sunburnt.

Neither of the women were Noos mother in law.

At the same time?

[Elmyn Noos]

1970's "Take my mother-in-law for example; I wish somebody would take her...."

 

2010's "Hey, everyone who reads this forum, my mother-in-law has terminal lung cancer. Hahaha!"

 

 

I took it that the Graham Norton reference was about someone wanting to bit risque and close to the edge.

 

Noos, I have laughed at many things you have said. This one, not so much.

 

I'm not trying for laughs. We're always hearing about some poor sod who's been diagnosed with cancer who "doesn't deserve it".

 

I just thought people might be grateful for the knowledge that this horrendous disease, which people die from whether they deserve it or not, sometimes strikes down the sort of people that it would target all the time if it only afflicted the most cuntish people in society.

 

If shit stuff has to happen, and it does, I take a little bit of solace in the knowledge that it happens to cunts too.

[neko]

In the time this thread has existed I have had sex with 2 women, got drunk twice and got sunburnt.

Neither of the women were Noos mother in law.

 

are you still in Mexico, senor Bitch ?

[zigackly]

are you still in Mexico, senor Bitch ?

 

He didn't get sunburnt in the UK, I can give you that one for free.