Jim MM

Shall I compare thee to thy summer outlay? Thou art more lowly and more desperate No wins do shake thy darling buds in play And summer's glee hath all too short a date. Sometime too bright the head of Klaassen shines, But mostly is thy goal complexion dim; And every Farhad Billionaire sometime declines, By results, or nature's changing course, untrimmed; But thy eternal summer shall not fade, Nor lose possession of the shite thou ow'st, Nor shall relegation battles drag thou wand'rest in his shade, When in the bottom three to Championship thou grow'st. So long as men can breathe, or eyes can see, So long lives redshite, and this gives life to thee.

18.City 19.Utd 20.Watford

Good luck to Denmark in the playoffs BTW. I'm convinced Ireland will draw Italy because I work with a load of Italians.

International breaks have also given me some of my favorite LFC moments too. Last year's refusal by Cameroon to accept Joel Matip's right to make up his own mind was great fun but my all time favorite still has to be Roy Hodgson sending Sturridge into a game without his crutches to "test his resolve".

Nil satis nisi optimum.

I care about international football. I'm not English so that helps but I still retain this idealistic notion that international should be a cut above, somehow higher class. I'm watching guys like David Myler, Shane Duffy, James McLean - donkeys in multi million dollar business LFC is part of and they gave me the best football buzz since Dortmund 18 months ago. Mane? Fantastic footballer, the last man we want to lose to injury and I have no doubt his absence is going to cost us dearly again. I don't blame international football though, this shit happens every time there's an international break and if the club wants/needs to maintain a squad of international level players then it needs to suspend its blind adherence to the doctrine that the Sky TV Premier Champions League is the only show in town because, thank god, it isn't.

High praise indeed from a man in your line of work.

Just ruined a fabulous Philip Tracey number with an audacious backheel. Need to work on my technique.

"Do or do not, you cunt. There is no 'attempting'"

Aye. At least John Henry doesn't park his yacht up on a trailer outside the asda.

Gonna backheel myself in the bollocks is what I'm gonna do.

I'm hoping Mignolet gets sent off for a headbutt.

I doubt Ferguson would give him permission to do that.

Sturridge would be all up in Heisenberg's face going "I AM THE ONE WHO GETS KNOCKS!"

15 points, y'unbelievin' kuffar bastards.

I was just reading the BBC report on Rooney and came across this : I can only assume he was too pissed to pull the other bulb out properly.

Raging Bell

Yeah, I hate the way that always happens.

Sack of Potatoes Tea Lady ~ Someone From the U18s ~ Plank ~ Jack Russell Wes Hoolahan ~ Kit Man ~ Traffic Cone Competition Winner ~ My Arse ~ Ringo Starr

I hope not. Under the circumstances I think that would impugn our probity.

Thank God Wayne was there though. And what a hero for risking his reputation (and associated sponsorships and endorsements), his career, his liberty and his marriage to help a drunk tart get home safely. If he hadn't intervened God knows what kind of overpaid, overexposed celebrity whose missus was out of town might have taken advantage of her.

I'm not sure tbh, but I've put a few feelers out and I'll find out more over the weekend.

Within the next week sometime, by the way. My sources tell me.

No, but her da heard him boasting about it and he had to apologize in front of everyone. Now he's saying they're going to get married, and in fairness she does look fit, if a bit moody. But her da keeps telling old mate to fuck off, no way is this gobshite marrying his daughter. So she is getting the hump over this fighting with her mam and her sisters. Now her family are calling her a cow. They're refusing to go to any wedding and she's saying they're not invited to her fucking wedding anyway.

This. An installment plan like they're buying a fucking three piece suite. This is a key player for us, starter for Brazil, this lad is going to win multiple trophies in any one season, and the Ballon D'Or. Barcelona are carrying the biggest transfer wad EVER! and they're slapping a down payment on the table that would allow us replace him with almost anyone we wanted from the Championship. Cunts.