little things that annoy the shit out of you

[Bruce Spanner]

Sometime around Bruce finishing work yesterday this conversation happened. We’ll refer to the other person in this conversation as ‘Her’ to protect the guilty.

 

B ‘Have we got everything WE need for the weekend so we can bunker down and don’t need to leave?’

 

H ‘Yes’

 

B ‘You sure. I’m calling at the shops anyway and can pick up anything WE need?’

 

H ‘It’s fine I got everything WE needed yesterday’

 

 

Fast forward to this morning...

 

B ‘where’s the coffee?’

 

H ‘is there none, I don’t drink it so I don’t know ?’

 

B ‘No, is there any bread?’

 

H ‘You know I’m off carbs’

 

B ‘so no coffee, no bread and by the looks of no a fucking thing for me to eat or drink at all?’

 

H ‘we’ve got smoked salmon’ 

 

B ‘Get your clothes on and get to the fucking shops’ 

 

The little thing that annoys me? 
 

Consideration, it doesn’t cost a thing.

 

Now I’m hungry and coffeeless through lack of consideration.

 

Shameful scenes.

 

 

 

[Elite]

22 minutes ago, Bruce Spanner said:

Sometime around Bruce finishing work yesterday this conversation happened. We’ll refer to the other person in this conversation as ‘Her’ to protect the guilty.

 

B ‘Have we got everything WE need for the weekend so we can bunker down and don’t need to leave?’

 

H ‘Yes’

 

B ‘You sure. I’m calling at the shops anyway and can pick up anything WE need?’

 

H ‘It’s fine I got everything WE needed yesterday’

 

 

Fast forward to this morning...

 

B ‘where’s the coffee?’

 

H ‘is there none, I don’t drink it so I don’t know ?’

 

B ‘No, is there any bread?’

 

H ‘You know I’m off carbs’

 

B ‘so no coffee, no bread and by the looks of no a fucking thing for me to eat or drink at all?’

 

H ‘we’ve got smoked salmon’ 

 

B ‘Get your clothes on and get to the fucking shops’ 

 

The little thing that annoys me? 
 

Consideration, it doesn’t cost a thing.

 

Now I’m hungry and coffeeless through lack of consideration.

 

Shameful scenes.

 

 

 

You should have learned by now to never trust females with shopping.

 

You can ask them to buy one item and they'll still forget it.

[alles ist gut]

I’d have polished off the smoked salmon before posting on here, though.

[Bruce Spanner]

5 minutes ago, alles ist gut said:

I’d have polished off the smoked salmon before posting on here, though.

I don’t like smoked salmon and she’s well aware of this.
 

I had Pringles and a cup of tea for breakfast, I’m fucking livid. Saturday is the day for a languorous breakfast which stretches long into the morning, not snaffling a handful of Pringles and a cup of PG.

 

There will be repercussions for this, of this be in no doubt! 

[Herp McDerp]

34 minutes ago, Bruce Spanner said:

I don’t like smoked salmon and she’s well aware of this.
 

I had Pringles and a cup of tea for breakfast, I’m fucking livid. Saturday is the day for a languorous breakfast which stretches long into the morning, not snaffling a handful of Pringles and a cup of PG.

 

There will be repercussions for this, of this be in no doubt! 

 

You're beginning to sound like one of them now.

[Bruce Spanner]

4 minutes ago, Herp McDerp said:

 

You're beginning to sound like one of them now.

“He who fights with monsters might take care lest he thereby become a monster. And if you gaze for long into an abyss, the abyss gazes also into you.”

 

Wise words, heeded my good man.

 

I’ll plot a new course.

[Curly]

On 18/11/2020 at 21:59, littletedwest said:

A bird i used work with sent me a picture of her in a low cut top saying"is this too slutty for instagramme" I was mirroring my phone to the TV at the time so WhatsApp popped up. Luckily our takeaway arrived at the door at same time so the mrs was distracted.

Fuck - that would have been carnage that mate! You’d never have explained that away fully.

[Bjornebye]

41 minutes ago, belarus said:

Fuck - that would have been carnage that mate! You’d never have explained that away fully.

There'll be carnage if he doesn't post the picture on here for us all to have an opinion

 

 

 

 

But yeah, FUCK. THAT. 

[littletedwest]

Its about five years ago so don't have it, wasn't like he were having an affair but I'd have struggled explaining it

[Tony Moanero]

7 hours ago, Bruce Spanner said:

I don’t like smoked salmon and she’s well aware of this.
 

I had Pringles and a cup of tea for breakfast, I’m fucking livid. Saturday is the day for a languorous breakfast which stretches long into the morning, not snaffling a handful of Pringles and a cup of PG.

 

There will be repercussions for this, of this be in no doubt! 

Negged. Pringles are a cunt’s crisp.

[Bruce Spanner]

15 minutes ago, Tony Moanero said:

Negged. Pringles are a cunt’s crisp.

It was more a narrative device to explore my displeasure, don’t worry I know they aren’t real crisps. The Pringles were literally the only consumable thing in the house, apart from smoked salmon,  a rogue lime and three thousand condiments and sauces, as I crawled down stairs in the expectation of a long, lazy breakfast.

 

You are of course correct though and under normal circumstances they’d not pass my lips.
 

Find my posts in the crisps thread for examples of real tastes. 

[Elite]

14 minutes ago, Tony Moanero said:

Negged. Pringles are a cunt’s crisp.

Spot on. Literally no part of them is nice. Crap shape and texture. Bland and rimmed with piss pot flavouring. 

 

The only positive is that you can make a break out of them, then swiftly shove them in the bin.

[Bruce Spanner]

2 minutes ago, Elite said:

Spot on. Literally no part of them is nice. Crap shape and texture. Bland and rimmed with piss pot flavouring. 

 

The only positive is that you can make a break out of them, then swiftly shove them in the bin.

They are made by boiling the potato’s and skimming the starch of the top of the water and then dehydrating the starch, it’s then shaped in to the disk shape. They do this until the potato is completely dissolved.

 

Grim.

 

Sometimes it’s better to not know how the sausage is made.

[Elite]

1 minute ago, Bruce Spanner said:

They are made by boiling the potato’s and skimming the starch of the top of the water and then dehydrating the starch, it’s then shaped in to the disk shape. They do this until the potato is completely dissolved.

 

Grim.

 

Sometimes it’s better to not know how the sausage is made.

You know an awful lot about them don't you? Mr Pringle.

[VladimirIlyich]

9 hours ago, Elite said:

You should have learned by now to never trust females with shopping.

 

You can ask them to buy one item and they'll still forget it.

Women refuse to make lists,which then leads to them spending a fuckload of money on useless shit and playing into the hands of the shops. I,like quite a few fellas,make a list and rarely put superfluous stuff into my shopping basket which then leads to her complaining that I haven't read her mind and put stuff in that she wants, but hasn't told me about.

[Bruce Spanner]

Just now, Elite said:

You know an awful lot about them don't you? Mr Pringle.

About fifteen years ago I found this out and have always refused to eat them since.

 

Then this shitstorm happened and my lizard brain started craving S&V ones, I assume as some reflexive childhood safety emulation; a psychological safety blanket of sorts.
 

That’s the only thing I can think off as they’re disgusting. 

[KMD7]

On 15/11/2020 at 18:49, Mudface said:

Yeah, I remember submitting something to it probably back in about '95, when I was finishing at Uni and we had access to the computer labs to write up our theses. I think it was probably either a review or some details about Sybil as I'd just read the book (great film that, btw). 

Saw that Sybil movie must have been 30 years ago. Sally Field was the Sybil character I think? Great film.

[easytoslip]

51 minutes ago, Bruce Spanner said:

They are made by boiling the potato’s and skimming the starch of the top of the water and then dehydrating the starch, it’s then shaped in to the disk shape. They do this until the potato is completely dissolved.

 

Grim.

 

Sometimes it’s better to not know how the sausage is made.

Or a Bowyers Pork Pie. 

[Mudface]

27 minutes ago, KMD7 said:

Saw that Sybil movie must have been 30 years ago. Sally Field was the Sybil character I think? Great film.

That's the one, yes, absolutely harrowing film, even though it was made for TV- it was shown in its full

two parts over two nights on the BBC in the early '80s I think, and I could barely sleep after the first episode (I was only 15 or so). Some of the scenes still give me goosepimples even years later, Field was amazing, switching personae at the drop of a hat. My roommate's bird was a psychology student and she had the book it was based on, that was even more chilling with abuse and torture explicitly recounted.

 

Then it came out once the author and Sybil herself had died, that it was very likely to be a complete fiction, if not outright fraud (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Shirley_Ardell_Mason). Still, it doesn't take away the power of some of the scenes in the film. There was a remake a few years back, I think, but it didn't have any of the power of the original.

 

 

This is well worth a watch, the film and book had a real effect on culture-

 

 

[Elite]

2 minutes ago, Colonel Kurtz said:

Car parking spaces are too fucking narrow.  Cars have got bigger and wider but the greedy car park owners refuse to acknowledge this so you’re left with a tiny gap and dinged doors. Go to the US and the car park spaces are twice as wide. 

That's because the people are as well.

[Curly]

On 20/11/2020 at 11:09, VladimirIlyich said:

Expect covid to be used to further big businesses grip on the market at the expense of the smaller ones. 

As is happening with this lockdown mate. Fucking depressing.

 

Another thing that’s depressing, is these shouts of racism about the Sainsbury’s advert. Heard something, so thought I’d have a look, and was non the fucking wiser after I’d seen it. I assumed it was a continuation of the BLM movement and that the portrayal of the black family in the ad was somehow derogatory, but I couldn’t see why. Then I look into it, and it’s fucking Britain first fucking dead head cunts complaining because it’s a black family in a British advert. Fuck off, for fuck sake.

 

Where are these cunts? I never come across them in life. It’s fucking mental. What’s wrong with them?

 

And if that wasn’t depressing enough, it now gives black British people a rightful reason to feel aggrieved at the minority response and further wedge a divide between people. The never ending whirlpool of wank. Shite.

[Curly]

11 hours ago, Bruce Spanner said:

Sometime around Bruce finishing work yesterday this conversation happened. We’ll refer to the other person in this conversation as ‘Her’ to protect the guilty.

 

B ‘Have we got everything WE need for the weekend so we can bunker down and don’t need to leave?’

 

H ‘Yes’

 

B ‘You sure. I’m calling at the shops anyway and can pick up anything WE need?’

 

H ‘It’s fine I got everything WE needed yesterday’

 

 

Fast forward to this morning...

 

B ‘where’s the coffee?’

 

H ‘is there none, I don’t drink it so I don’t know ?’

 

B ‘No, is there any bread?’

 

H ‘You know I’m off carbs’

 

B ‘so no coffee, no bread and by the looks of no a fucking thing for me to eat or drink at all?’

 

H ‘we’ve got smoked salmon’ 

 

B ‘Get your clothes on and get to the fucking shops’ 

 

The little thing that annoys me? 
 

Consideration, it doesn’t cost a thing.

 

Now I’m hungry and coffeeless through lack of consideration.

 

Shameful scenes.

 

 

 

Schoolboy that mate - that needs a follow up question confirming what she’d bought.

[Curly]

3 hours ago, littletedwest said:

Its about five years ago so don't have it, wasn't like he were having an affair but I'd have struggled explaining it

Struggled? You’d have had no fucking chance.

 

”Who is she (again)?”

”(I’ve told you!) Some bird from work”

”Why is she texting YOU that?”

”I don’t know”

”I bet you fucking don’t you little cheating twat”

On repeat for years

[Dougie Do'ins]

Not being able to use certain characters like / in MS document names.  

[Mudface]

Just Eat/ takeaway delivery times-

• Delivery in 25-30 minutes, great.
   
• Order and this extends to between 45-60 minutes. OK, maybe they got busy in the two minutes it took to make the order.
   
• Thirty minutes later, automated text arrives to say it's on its way.
   
• Another 45 minutes and two phone calls later ('ooh, it's on its way, but I can't call the driver right now'), it finally arrives.

Time wasting assholes.