Car Detailing.

[VladimirIlyich]

I hate cleaning my car but going to vacuum and try to wash it(if poosible due to drought,yes really a drought in a country where it rains for 50 weeks a year!) today.

[dockers_strike]

7 minutes ago, Simbo said:

Yes that’s pretty much exactly what I use.

 

Have read a little about ceramic coating but don’t know loads about it…..feels like it’s something I would cock up (if that’s possible).

 

Do you watch any YouTube videos on detailing? I like Forensic detailing and Pan The Organiser….both very good channels.

I had a metallic black car back in about 2012 that never looked particularly good even when new. I took it to a detailing guy about 20 odd miles from home and asked if I was ok to watch. He said yeah providing you dont start up as competition.

 

I just watched him go through the process and he gave me some tips so tried to follow them. The best advice was the 2 bucket method, never to use a sponge and how to use the clay.

 

I was going to invest in a trolley jack to take the wheels off and clean the inside of the alloys. Decided an EZ wheel brush and grazed knuckles was a cheaper option and just clean them on the car now.

3 minutes ago, Strontium said:

 

Is this satire? It reads like satire.

No. I just prefer my car to be clean and the paintwork not full of swirls, scratches or damaged by bird crap. It can make a difference if \ when you come to trade in or sell your car but that isnt the main reason I invest the effort.

[Rico1304]

I told you 

[dockers_strike]

This stuff looks quite good to give the car a little extra protection. Only 15 quid so not that much more than many ordinary Quick Detailers on the market.

 

Might order a bottle when the Chemical Guys QD has run out.

 

 

[stringvest]

Take mine to the Bulgarian lads once every six months.  They wash it.   It's a car FFS.  

[VERBAL DIARRHEA]

1 minute ago, stringvest said:

Take mine to the Bulgarian lads once every six months.  They wash it.   It's a car FFS.  

He drives an OCD.

[Chairman Meow]

8 minutes ago, stringvest said:

Take mine to the Bulgarian lads once every six months.  They wash it.   It's a car FFS.  

Flash bastard. 

 

I take mine to the place near mine once a year whether it needs it or not. Between parking at the farm I store my stuff at and being at the rally school which is also on an old farm my car only stays free of being covered in crap for about 10 minutes maximum after being washed. 

 

 

However, for anyone looking for car cleaning products I strongly recommend Sonax products. This may or may not be linked to the fact I had sponsorship from them and most likely will again if I ever got to the point of having a finished competition car at some point in the future. 

 

They also make the best screenwash on the planet, their winter blue screenwash is the only stuff I ever had which could clear wet mud almost instantly during a rally or rallycross instead of just smearing wet mud all over your screen for a couple of minutes. 

[dockers_strike]

7 minutes ago, stringvest said:

Take mine to the Bulgarian lads once every six months.  They wash it.   It's a car FFS.  

And apart from the Bulgarian 'lads' probably being paid less than minimum working wage in all sorts of shit weather, they put loads of swirls and scratches on it.

 

Then you complain when you trade it \ sell it privately you dont get top dollar for probably the 2nd biggest transaction you make after buying a house.

 

If you drive bangernomics, fair enough. Each to their own.

[VladimirIlyich]

16 minutes ago, stringvest said:

Take mine to the Bulgarian lads once every six months.  They wash it.   It's a car FFS.  

If you drive a Skoda it triples its value.

[ZonkoVille77]

I view a car as an object that gets me from A to B and that's it. Don't give a shit what it looks like or how old it is once it's safe, has Bluetooth connectivity and doesn't eat fuel. I wash mine 3 times a year at most or if there's bird shit on it. They're a necessary evil. 

[VladimirIlyich]

1 minute ago, ZonkoVille77 said:

I view a car as an object that gets me from A to B and that's it. Don't give a shit what it looks like or how old it is once it's safe, has Bluetooth connectivity and doesn't eat fuel. I wash mine 3 times a year at most or if there's bird shit on it. They're a necessary evil. 

I like the inside of the car to be nice and clean and tidy(impossible with a 2 year old grandaughter attracted to puddles like a magnet is to metal) but the exterior is not that important over all to me.

[ZonkoVille77]

3 minutes ago, VladimirIlyich said:

I like the inside of the car to be nice and clean and tidy(impossible with a 2 year old grandaughter attracted to puddles like a magnet is to metal) but the exterior is not that important over all to me.

 

Yea pretty much that. I don't like it messy inside at all but you can't look at the exterior while driving so I couldn't give a shit what it looks like. 

[dockers_strike]

35 minutes ago, ZonkoVille77 said:

I view a car as an object that gets me from A to B and that's it. Don't give a shit what it looks like or how old it is once it's safe, has Bluetooth connectivity and doesn't eat fuel. I wash mine 3 times a year at most or if there's bird shit on it. They're a necessary evil. 

That's fair enough if it floats your boat. Ive a mate who doesnt care about cars as long as it goes and doesnt break down.

 

He washes his with fairy liquid and a sponge. He asked me one day why his paintwork always looked dull and loads of 'circular scratches' all over it? But at the end of the day, he isnt bothered.

 

 

[dockers_strike]

Fuck me, you have to wonder about the state of the homes some of these people live in when the dirty bastards have a car with this much rubbish strewn around and filthy!

 

 

[dandyman]

On 11/08/2022 at 21:22, dockers_strike said:

Anyone into it? Some people just wash their car using any old sponge aka a grit magnet and even use washing up liquid on the paintwork which is a big no, no. That'll just strip any polish, glaze or wax off the bodywork and leave the paintwork looking dull.

 

Although there's no hose pipe ban in the United utilities area I know of and certainly not 10 days ago, I resisted the urge to use the snowfoam cannon and powerwash on SWMBO Twingo. It hadnt been washed for a good 3 months and that had been finished off with some Meg's quick detailer to keep the dust at bay.

 

But needs must so even though the day was showery and the car already wet, I washed and dried the wheels before setting to with the 2 bucket method. Plunge the washmitt into the clean, wash down a panel or two, rinse the mitt in the 2nd bucket then back into the first with the car wash. After all the car including shut lines was washed down, it's out with the clay bar to remove the dead flies stuck on the front bumper, bonnet and tar spots from the wings, door panels and sills. I prefer Bilt Hamber clay because you can use clean water as the lube.

 

Once all the necessary panels are clayed and between the showers, it was another rinse off then use a couple of waffle weave cloths to dry the whole body including windows off. A couple of large micro fibre cloths helped mop up any remaining water. The sky looked a bit shit and another shower was imminent so I decided there was unlikely to be time to put a glaze on it or attack the interior so that'll have to wait for another day! Finally gave it a going over and buff with Chemical Guys Synthetic Quick Detailer.

 

Also bought some CG Waterless Wash and Wax for when the inevitable ban comes along. Have to go easy with this as you cant use it on heavy dirt. Essentially the car has to be relatively clean else you risk scratching the paint work.

 

I havent bothered cleaning the engine on the Twingo since we got this so I guess I need to get a suitable all purpose cleaner next.

 

Not bad going for just under 2 hours work when normally, it takes a good 4+ hours to do a complete job inside and out.

Oi oi!!

[mattyq]

Difficult to wank too this thread

[VladimirIlyich]

3 hours ago, mattyq said:

Difficult to wank too this thread

You need more oil.

[dockers_strike]

4 hours ago, mattyq said:

Difficult to wank too this thread

You havent heard or seen 'beading porn' then?!

 

In the meantime, have a wank over Sarah.

 

 

[cochyn]

Two buckets, Meguiars shampoo, elbow grease, chamois and Simoniz Original wax to finish (lasts forever). Everything else is bunkum. Never rotary polish the car - all it does is abrade the lacquer until it's gone. Use something like Megs Scratch-X to fill any swirls. Auto Glym leather conditioner is a must (for leather seats obvs, proper fucks up velour).

 

[dockers_strike]

10 hours ago, cochyn said:

Two buckets, Meguiars shampoo, elbow grease, chamois and Simoniz Original wax to finish (lasts forever). Everything else is bunkum. Never rotary polish the car - all it does is abrade the lacquer until it's gone. Use something like Megs Scratch-X to fill any swirls. Auto Glym leather conditioner is a must (for leather seats obvs, proper fucks up velour).

 

That Megs Scratch X is good stuff for covering minor blemishes.

 

Now we only have the Twingo, I hand apply the wax and glaze. Not an Auto Glym man myself. Alway found it left bits of a chalky residue on the paintwork. The pro detailer I went to swears by it and said I was probably applying too much! I did use the leather conditioner and found that to be very good.

[Bjornebye]

On 18/08/2022 at 12:53, stringvest said:

Take mine to the Bulgarian lads once every six months.  They wash it.   It's a Penny Farthing FFS.  

.

[Dr Nowt]

On 18/08/2022 at 12:53, stringvest said:

Take mine to the Bulgarian lads once every six months.  They wash it.   It's a car FFS.  

Bucarkke.

[Captain Turdseye]

On 18/08/2022 at 12:53, stringvest said:

Take mine to the Bulgarian lads once every six months.  They wash it.   It's a car FFS.  

Romanians and Lithuanians run the car wash game in my town. They’re not to be fucked at. 
 

On 18/08/2022 at 13:24, VladimirIlyich said:

I like the inside of the car to be nice and clean and tidy(impossible with a 2 year old grandaughter attracted to puddles like a magnet is to metal) but the exterior is not that important over all to me.

 

Spot on. You spend your time in the car, not looking at it from the outside. I like the inside clean, especially for long journeys. If I’m travelling far I’ll take it to the Lithuanians for a spruce up. 
 

Clean interior and Bluetooth connection for Spotify are the only two things I care about. 

[dockers_strike]

On 18/08/2022 at 13:24, VladimirIlyich said:

I like the inside of the car to be nice and clean and tidy(impossible with a 2 year old grandaughter attracted to puddles like a magnet is to metal) but the exterior is not that important over all to me.

To be honest, I find keeping the inside in tip top condition is more of a drag. I tend to just give it the old vacuum cleaner and wipe down with a micro fibre cloth to every 3 or 4 external cleans enough. There again, our 1 + year old grandson hasnt been in the car yet.

 

Getting the inside of windows smear clean is a job that always fails me despite a mountain of glass cleaners!

[Captain Turdseye]

Was on a B road an hour or two ago. National Speed Limit, usually takes me 40 mins each way, and there was some auld cunt in a Twingo doing 35mph all the way along with a massive tailback. Absolute bellend. If you’re scared to drive quickly, get off the fucking road. 
 

I’ve now got no time for any cunt who drives a Twingo. I didn’t get a good look at the wax job on it, so I don’t know if it was Dockers or not.