little things that annoy the shit out of you

[Mook]

Are the Scottish anything but pasty faced?

Racist.

[VladimirIlyich]

Are the Scottish anything but pasty faced?

Drunk?

[Mook]

Drunk?

Sexist.

[Vincent Vega]

Idiots who get in a lift in a hotel a few floors below you and then press the button for the ground floor even though someone is in the lift, it is going down and the ground floor button is already lit. Do they think I'm just stood in the lift going up and down all day and wouldn't think to press the ground floor button?

[lifetime fan]

Scrotes hanging around outside shops.

 

Scrote: Can you buy us some fags please mate?

Me: Why don't you buy them yourself?

Scrote: Because I'm not old enough

Me: No then. You're not old enough to smoke and fuck off out of my way.

[Jairzinho]

Did you at least give him his money back?

[Bjornebye]

Scrotes hanging around outside shops.

 

Scrote: Can you buy us some fags please mate?

Me: Why don't you buy them yourself?

Scrote: Because I'm not old enough

Me: No then. You're not old enough to smoke and fuck off out of my way.

 

Depends on my mood. I once got offered a blow-job off some girl to go and get her some wine. Got to be honest, if she had just offered me the blow-job and said nothing else i'd have got a suck off it. She looked about 20 and was quite fit in a Tulisa kind of way. 

 

I reckon she had just forgot her ID. 

 

I just got her the wine and sent her on her way then went home and had a wank. Like a true gentleman. 

[Mook]

I'd be useless anyway, boy in the shop refused me a carryout on Saturday because I didn't have any ID, I'm fucking 35.

 

I know you're meant to take it as a compliment but I was gasping on a bevvy.

[Bjornebye]

I'd be useless anyway, boy in the shop refused me a carryout on Saturday because I didn't have any ID, I'm fucking 35.

 

I know you're meant to take it as a compliment but I was gasping on a bevvy.

 

I read that in this man's voice

 

[Red Dawn]

Depends on my mood. I once got offered a blow-job off some girl to go and get her some wine. Got to be honest, if she had just offered me the blow-job and said nothing else i'd have got a suck off it. She looked about 20 and was quite fit in a Tulisa kind of way. 

 

I reckon she had just forgot her ID. 

 

I just got her the wine and sent her on her way then went home and had a wank. Like a true gentleman. 

 

Stig..mate..I've been reading these forums for a lot of years now and enjoy many of your contributions but I have to ask....have you ever met a female who didnt suck (or offer to suck) you off ?

[setreal]

Stig..mate..I've been reading these forums for a lot of years now and enjoy many of your contributions but I have to ask....have you ever met a female who didnt suck (or offer to suck) you off ?

 

Hey! 20k posts in two years don't fill themselves, give him a break.

[stringvest]

Hey! 20k posts in two years don't fill themselves, give him a break.

 

 

He met plenty when he was trying to chat the girls up in that mad bar in Reading as far as I remember.  

[Bjornebye]

I have nothing better to do these days than post on here. Especially at work and when commuting so you know, it adds up. 

 

As for the blow-job offers. No, even my nan wants a piece. If you met me you will see why. 13.4 stone of pure sex. 

[Bjornebye]

He met plenty when he was trying to chat the girls up in that mad bar in Reading as far as I remember.  

 

Love that place

 

[lifetime fan]

Love that place

 

 

It was on the sofa in front of that right hand window where the two lezzers were making out.

[Bjornebye]

It was on the sofa in front of that right hand window where the two lezzers were making out.

 

Why the fuck we left is beyond me. I was up for bedding in for the night with a bottle of sambuca and a lesbian sucking my toes. 

[lifetime fan]

I had a train to catch.

 

Pathetic excuse I know.

[Bjornebye]

I had a train to catch.

 

Pathetic excuse I know.

 

Hahaha me and Peter were the last to leave. Everyone just sloped off and left us both too it. 

 

I repeat, it was not a gay bar! 

 

Last I saw of stringy he was tucking into a pasty as I bolted off for the train. 

[Carvalho Diablo]

Hahaha me and Peter were the last to leave. Everyone just sloped off and left us both too it. 

 

I repeat, it was not a gay bar! 

 

Last I saw of stringy he was tucking into a pasty as I bolted off for the train. 

 

Righto.

 

[General Dryness]

I have nothing better to do these days than post on here. Especially at work and when commuting so you know, it adds up. 

 

As for the blow-job offers. No, even my nan wants a piece. If you met me you will see why. 13.4 stone of pure sex. 

 

And what does your other leg weigh?

[stringvest]

Trying to get a same day doctor's appointment - have to call at 0800.  Constantly engaged.  can't put ringback on the number, and then when you do eventually get through all the same day appointments have gone.  I reckon touts are getting them and selling them on.  

[Bjornebye]

Ridiculous thing to say.

 

 

What time you after?

[stringvest]

You're not even a real doctor.  i wish I'd known that before the prostate exam.

[lifetime fan]

Cunts ringing in sick for a shift 5 minutes before it starts, meaning I end up having to stop on after already doing 24 hours you fat fuck.

[Bjornebye]

Go easy on him Col, he is trying to get a doctors appointment !