One night stands

[Chris]

I reckon I could pull Ruth. She seemed to dig me quite a bit...

 

She's told me on numerous occasions, she'd fuck me if she was single. It's an unspoken thing we have these days, but the odd look we give each other confirms it.

[Unrighteous]

Ill let you off, you seem a sound lad.

 

Ta mate... I only had the best of intentons.

 

 

For tonight, anywho! :thumbsup:

[Chris]

Ill let you off, you seem a sound lad.

 

What a gent.

[Unrighteous]

She's told me on numerous occasions, she'd fuck me if she was single. It's an unspoken thing we have these days, but the odd look we give each other confirms it.

 

Indeed indeed... I honestly thought you were plugging her untill I start chatting to her at the Kray.

 

I then was thinking... wait a minute? Is she single? I know that look!

[Unrighteous]

you know chris... if I had your willingness to approach birds. My lifetime numbers would have probably been doubled...

 

Scary thought, that. My dick would probably fall off if that happened...

[Chris]

you know chris... if I had your willingness to approach birds. My lifetime numbers would have probably been doubled...

 

Scary thought, that. My dick would probably fall off if that happened...

 

I see this as the beginning of a formidable team, my good man.

[Randy Marsh]

Im actually getting a bit worried about myself. The only people that tip me behind the bar are fucking fellers. I had some homo lad coming on to me last night when i was serving him, he started sucking his fuckin finger in that way that birds do on television X or something. I fucking shit meself. Not a good sign. I think another trip to magaluf is in order!

[Unrighteous]

I see this as the beginning of a formidable team, my good man.

 

You just need to scout a good location down south. However, if I go to London I'll be forced to stay at some birds place... as I've a few down that way.

 

(I might require the use of your floor... or your roommate, however it goes)

[Unrighteous]

Im actually getting a bit worried about myself. The only people that tip me behind the bar are fucking fellers. I had some homo lad coming on to me last night when i was serving him, he started sucking his fuckin finger in that way that birds do on television X or something. I fucking shit meself. Not a good sign. I think another trip to magaluf is in order!

 

Back when I was a boucer... I had loads of gay fellas trying to get it on with me. Ridiculous, it was... some of the shit that they would say.

 

However, the vancouver gayers are quite fucking aggressive.

[Chris]

You just need to scout a good location down south. However, if I go to London I'll be forced to stay at some birds place... as I've a few down that way.

 

(I might require the use of your floor... or your roommate, however it goes)

 

Well with one comes another. Hook me up beeeeotch. You don't wanna fuck my roomie though. She's a loon. She performed fellatio on me back a couple of years ago. It wasn't great. I love the word fellatio, it reminds me of silence of the lambs... did he make you perform fellatio? Awesome.

[Unrighteous]

Your 'loon' roommate is still a fucking cutie and I live three hours away from her. So, it's win/win really.

 

Unfortunately, that would make another bird who will get angry if I don't give her a shag whilst in london...

 

 

I ONLY HAVE SO MANY NIGHTS IN A WEEKEND!

 

edit: I also recall that she fellated you. However, I followed your footsteps once before... and now giggle that DT followed mine.

 

(did he at least use protection with her? I didn't have any)

[Unrighteous]

Ugh... I mean... I'm a nice guy, virgin. What's your sisters number again, Chris? She was cute.

[Chris]

Your 'loon' roommate is still a fucking cutie and I live three hours away from her. So, it's win/win really.

 

Unfortunately, that would make another bird who will get angry if I don't give her a shag whilst in london...

 

 

I ONLY HAVE SO MANY NIGHTS IN A WEEKEND!

 

edit: I also recall that she fellated you. However, I followed your footsteps once before... and now giggle that DT followed mine.

 

(did he at least use protection with her? I didn't have any)

 

Dude, how do you know the roomie fellated me? Did I tell you that shit?

[Unrighteous]

Dude, how do you know the roomie fellated me? Did I tell you that shit?

 

Yup. I remember you showing me her pic off facebook and I was like, "I'd hit that."

 

ps Ive got some new pics from that bird from Lancaster... I forgot to show you. Yay for fun with mobile phones.

[Chris]

Dude, that chick tonight man. She was so cute. That cunt friend ruined a beautiful beautiful thing.

[Randy Marsh]

Right im off for a wank and a kip, buenos noches!

[Chris]

Yup. I remember you showing me her pic off facebook and I was like, "I'd hit that."

 

ps Ive got some new pics from that bird from Lancaster... I forgot to show you. Yay for fun with mobile phones.

 

Who's the lancaster chick?

[Unrighteous]

Indeed indeed... I was surprised my taken girl let me finger her in the fucking bar being taken and all that. What a whore.

[Chris]

Right im off for a wank and a kip, buenos noches!

 

Adious megadouche... ahppy wankage.

[Unrighteous]

Who's the lancaster chick?

 

The bird who sent me pics of herself starkers on the fur rug that I showed you that night...

 

and I've got some naughties from one of my birds in vancouver but they are on my comp.

[Chris]

Indeed indeed... I was surprised my taken girl let me finger her in the fucking bar being taken and all that. What a whore.

 

Whores rule

[Unrighteous]

Right im off for a wank and a kip, buenos noches!

 

Enjoy the wank, wanker.

[Unrighteous]

Whores rule

 

Yeah, it's surprising that we didn't find one outside the maccys. Liverpool is lousy with them.

[Chris]

Yeah, it's surprising that we didn't find one outside the maccys. Liverpool is lousy with them.

 

All you're gonna find in that Maccys is a slap in the mouth from some horrible shaven headed, scumbag lacoste wearing cunt, that I attempt to avoid with every fibre of my being, sadly. Goodnight dude.

[Unrighteous]

Night mate... I've got an epi of Curb your Enthusiasm to watch.