Joke!

[AngryOfTuebrook]

What football team do Scottish ghosts support?

 

Wraith Rovers.

[VladimirIlyich]

8 hours ago, AngryofTuebrook said:

What football team do Scottish ghosts support?

 

Wraith Rovers.

I'll do the Grandad jokes around here!

[dylstar]

I have a joke about chemistry but Na

[easytoslip]

It wasn't buggery m'lud, he was just giving me a wank with his arse. 

[AngryOfTuebrook]

[AngryOfTuebrook]

[JagSquared]

I thought of a carpentry joke.

 

I’m just not sure If it woodwork though.

[Davelfc]

I have recently been diagnosed with a rare amnesia where I deny the existence of certain 80s bands, there is no cure. 

[Butch]

Doctor : I’m afraid you’re suffering from extreme obesity
Woman: Yeah, it runs in the family
Doctor: Don’t lie you fat fuck; no one runs in your family!!

[dylstar]

Anycunt know how long it takes tae get yer hearing aid back aff the doctors? Handed mine in 2 weeks ago n no heard anything since

[halewood pete]

[halewood pete]

[halewood pete]

[halewood pete]

[halewood pete]

[halewood pete]

[halewood pete]

[halewood pete]

[halewood pete]

[halewood pete]

[halewood pete]

[Davelfc]

I sent a naked picture of myself to everyone in my address book. Not only was it embarrassing but it cost a fortune in stamps. 

[JagSquared]

I lost my hair years ago but I still carry around a comb with me.

 

i can’t part with it.

[Nelly-Szoboszlai]

This is a story to inspire you to reach for your dreams and never ever give up ...

 

Many years ago my mate's missus came a close second in the Miss Liverpool 1997 competition. Later that year she was beset by a long period of bad luck. She suffered years of drug and alcohol abuse and a series of eating disorders. She lost a leg and needed facial reconstruction surgery after a road traffic accident. Later, she suffered 90% burns in a factory fire. Several of her teeth were knocked out and an eye gouged in a fight outside a KFC Chicken Take Away. The stress caused severe hair loss and facial warts. But she never stopped believing.

 

And then finally, last month... 

 

...she was crowned Miss Birkenhead 2020.

[bigthrusts]

Herb crusted fish? There's a thyme and a plaice for that.