Fish

[Redder Lurtz]

Lurtz Towers needs some pets. Unfortunately cats and dogs are not practical so I might get some fish. What's the most cost effective way to get some fish started off that won't die within a week of buying them?

[Liverpool lad]

Get a parrot. I have one and they are a boss pet to have

[lifetime fan]

Lurtz Towers needs some pets. Unfortunately cats and dogs are not practical so I might get some fish. What's the most cost effective way to get some fish started off that won't die within a week of buying them?

 

 

Go the fair.

[Redder Lurtz]

Get a parrot. I have one and they are a boss pet to have

 

Aren't they a bit noisy, and smuggled into the UK in inner tubes or something? And expensive?

 

Go the fair.

 

You'll notice one of my requirements is that that the fuckers don't shuffle off this mortal coil sharpish.

[Dougie Do'ins]

Never really thought as fish being pets. Boring as fuck.

[VladimirIlyich]

Taxidermy maybe?

[Captain Turdseye]

Mrs Turdseye has got a genuine phobia of fish. She went to see 'Ted' the other week after I'd already seen it, rang me afterwards to complain that I didn't warn her about the 20 second scene that was set in an aquarium. Her next door neighbour asked her to feed their goldfish while they went away, she seemed genuinely in fear of her life.

 

Naturally, like any good boyfriend would do, I've taken any opportunity to put Attenborough programmes on the documentary channels whenever I've got the remote. It's the little reef bugs and the sea snails that get her really twitchy. Fucking great fun.

[Redder Lurtz]

Never really thought as fish being pets. Boring as fuck.

 

Yeah but they're like plants aren't they. Mode decorative than anything. I've got two plants and I like them a lot but they don't move around much. Plus you can't buy an underwater castle for plants.

[Liverpool lad]

They are easy to get, I am training mine to say 'I am evil' and 'I am a fucking parrot' at the moment

[Redder Lurtz]

What brand of parrot is it Mark? And how much did it cost? And do you need a license for it like you do for a fish?

[Pony Princess]

Fish are not pets but they do make a good feature in any room and caring for them can become an interesting hobby.

 

For babbys first fishtank, you should set up a cold water tank. Cold freshwater fish are a lot more hardy than tropical and they are actually pretty interesting critters, even though they are not as brightly coloured as tropicals.

 

Have a look at these fishy little numbers, some of my favourite freshwater aquarium fish:

 

Borneo sucker

Weather/dojo loach

Silver/white cloud minnow

goldfish (shit loads of varieties, not as boring as they sound)

 

You can also have toads, newts and snails living in coldwater tanks.

 

My tank at the moment has 6 white cloud minnows, 2 weather loaches and 2 fire-bellied newts. They are all +2 years old now, the tank is really well balanced.

 

Fishkeeping is awesome. It is like gardening.. with water and fish...

[Redder Lurtz]

So what am I looking at cost wise to get started Chicken? I don't want to be ripped of by some fishy salesman type.

[lifetime fan]

Mrs Turdseye has got a genuine phobia of fish. She went to see 'Ted' the other week after I'd already seen it, rang me afterwards to complain that I didn't warn her about the 20 second scene that was set in an aquarium. Her next door neighbour asked her to feed their goldfish while they went away, she seemed genuinely in fear of her life.

 

Naturally, like any good boyfriend would do, I've taken any opportunity to put Attenborough programmes on the documentary channels whenever I've got the remote. It's the little reef bugs and the sea snails that get her really twitchy. Fucking great fun.

 

 

 

Stick dead goldfish down the bog, she'd see the funny side in that.

[TheBitch]

Some good advice from CL, when you've mastered keeping tropicals for a few years you can move onto marine fish. Then we can talk.

 

I skipped keeping goldfish and tropicals and went straight in at the deep end(pun kinda intended) and went for a marine fish tank with corals the lot. They're awesome. Fish rule.

[TheBitch]

So what am I looking at cost wise to get started Chicken? I don't want to be ripped of by some fishy salesman type.

 

Depends what you're after Lurtz, do you want a good size tank or something smaller?

 

I was told to buy the biggest I could afford as changes in water conditions will be slower and easier to pick up in a larger tank, whereas in a smaller tank, drastic things can happen fast. All of this is irrelevant if you're keeping a few goldfish in a small tank though.

[lifetime fan]

[Dougie Do'ins]

What brand of parrot is it Mark? And how much did it cost? And do you need a license for it like you do for a fish?

It's a Pollycell.

[The Flâneur]

He's got 99 problems, but a bitch ain't one.

[Jairzinho]

.

[sparta7]

Get some tetras to start, ones that like that, colourful and you can get quite a few relatively cheaply to get going. And put proper plants in with your decorative shipwrecks, cannons etc to give them something to hide amongst and oxygenate the water. And if you add further species make sure they arent the type that eat fucking tetras, like I inadvertently did.

[Redder Lurtz]

He's got 99 problems, but a bitch ain't one.

 

What do you actually add to this site other than following me around late at night to fling what I assume you feel are clever insults? Oh that's right - fuck all. Why don't you do what most other sad, lonely, unhappily married blokes do who go on the internet late at night when their wife's tucked up in bed and visit pornhub or something? You're fucking pathetic man.

[Redder Lurtz]

Depends what you're after Lurtz, do you want a good size tank or something smaller?

 

I was told to buy the biggest I could afford as changes in water conditions will be slower and easier to pick up in a larger tank, whereas in a smaller tank, drastic things can happen fast. All of this is irrelevant if you're keeping a few goldfish in a small tank though.

 

I've no idea to be honest Bitch. Reckon I'll have a sneak around a pet shop tomorrow and see what starter kits there are.

[ticklemeclemo]

Betta fish are easy to look after, and dont cost much to start with

 

Some good info here

 

Betta Fish and Betta Fish Care

[Fowlers God]

They are easy to get, I am training mine to say 'I am evil' and 'I am a fucking parrot' at the moment

 

Serves me right for not reading through posts properly. Here's me thinking they aint fucking nemo buddy.

[Captain Turdseye]

The parrot in my Avatar is trained to say "Negged", "Beans are essential" and "Walk the plank, you dirty Manc"