What constitutes the perfect cooked breakfast?

[TheBitch]

9 hours ago, Lee909 said:

Is that one slice of bacon?

Three. 

2 sausages. 1 Cumberland. 1 Welsh dragon. 

2 slices of black pud. 

All from the butchers. Although the black pudding was sliced a bit thin for my liking. 

 

I don't normally go for hash browns but my mate was up from London and being a southerner doesn't like black pudding so I bought hash browns to fill up his plate a bit and then threw some on mine because I was feeling hungry. 

 

Not pictured are 2 slices of thick white toast and a cup of strong tea. No sugar. 

 

 

[aRdja]

36 minutes ago, TheBitch said:

Three. 

2 sausages. 1 Cumberland. 1 Welsh dragon. 

2 slices of black pud. 

All from the butchers. Although the black pudding was sliced a bit thin for my liking. 

 

I don't normally go for hash browns but my mate was up from London and being a southerner doesn't like black pudding so I bought hash browns to fill up his plate a bit and then threw some on mine because I was feeling hungry. 

 

Not pictured are 2 slices of thick white toast and a cup of strong tea. No sugar. 

 

 

Looked really good mate.

 

This is more of a preference than anything else, but I really can’t stomach sunny side up. I like my eggs medium over. 

[cloggypop]

This multiculturalism has gone too far. 

[SammyAftershave]

Those eggs look as though they are suffering from depression.

[Fugitive]

I’ve just ordered a fry-up from Just eat and I’m now starting to worry about what is going to turn up. This has the potential to be a fucking monstrosity.

 

will update when it arrives.

[Numero Veinticinco]

6 minutes ago, Fugitive said:

I’ve just ordered a fry-up from Just eat and I’m now starting to worry about what is going to turn up. This has the potential to be a fucking monstrosity.

 

will update when it arrives.

Ooh, yeah, that sounds like it could have uncooked bacon fat and warm bread written all over it. I look forward to seeing how fucked it is.

[Fugitive]

There was no description of what it consists of. The fear is that beans are involved.

[Numero Veinticinco]

If you ordered a full English, it will. The vast majority demand it. 

[Mook]

2 minutes ago, Numero Veinticinco said:

If you ordered a full English, it will. The vast majority demand it. 

If he's in Glasgow he wouldn't want to be ordering a 'full English'.

 

I have beans on a fry up but wouldn't want them in a home delivery one. In fact I only ever got one home delivery fry up, never again. Taking your life in hands doing that shit.

[Numero Veinticinco]

3 minutes ago, Mook said:

If he's in Glasgow he wouldn't want to be ordering a 'full English'.

 

I have beans on a fry up but wouldn't want them in a home delivery one. In fact I only ever got one home delivery fry up, never again. Taking your life in hands doing that shit.

Agree. I tried one after a night on the piss. Grim. 

[TheHowieLama]

I have a feeling it will be ice cold -- can't wait.

[Fugitive]

Fucking hell. It’s a fucking disaster from top to bottom.

 

One cheap anorexic link sausage that they sliced in half to make it look as if I got two.

Fatty undercooked shit bacon from a pig with aids.

Limp mushrooms.

overcooked eggs.

Cheap Black Pudding.

Shit looking Haggis.

 

That was bad enough but the lot of it was floating on a sea on fucking beans that looked like they had fallen out of somebody’s arse.

 

-75/10

 

straight in the bin.

[Numero Veinticinco]

Hahoohoowee that's fucking horrendous. How much did you pay for that little box of botulism?

[Fugitive]

1 minute ago, Numero Veinticinco said:

Hahoohoowee that's fucking horrendous. How much did you pay for that little box of botulism?

£5.50 + £2 delivery.

 

feel like jumping in the car and going around to firebomb the place.

[TheHowieLama]

It is fantastic!!!!

 

 

Try chewing on the aluminum foil to get the taste out of your mouth

[Guest]

7 minutes ago, Fugitive said:

£5.50 + £2 delivery.

 

feel like jumping in the car and going around to firebomb the place.

Think of the poor fucker who had to deliver it. He should have got £5.50 with the 'food' costing £2.

[Oh Buoy]

15 minutes ago, Fugitive said:

£5.50 + £2 delivery.

 

feel like jumping in the car and going around to firebomb the place.

Hahahaha. 

 

7 fucking fiddy. 

[Tony Moanero]

I rarely order food, but when I do I always make sure the delivery person waits until I’ve checked the contents and temperature of my order. Anything that isn’t up to scratch gets sent back. I can’t abide wasting money.

[Fugitive]

12 minutes ago, Shooter in the Motor said:

Think of the poor fucker who had to deliver it. He should have got £5.50 with the 'food' costing £2.

The cunt that dropped it off was also wearing an apron. I think the bitch cooked it as well.

[Jairzinho]

I don't think I've ever seen a breakfast before that genuinely looks like a collection of different turds.

[Mook]

I'm going to be honest here, get rid of the fungus & the beans & I would quite happily eat that, I mean it's shite but it'd do for a hangover.

 

Moral of the story though is don't get a fry up delivered, it's never going to be up to much.

[TheHowieLama]

Remove the meats -- chop all finely.

 

Place rest of mess (eggs, fungi, beans, bread) into food processor - puree.

 

Put in pot with 4 cups chicken broth - add chopped mixed meat.

 

VOILA!!! Full English soup!

[Bjornebye]

2 hours ago, Fugitive said:

Fucking hell. It’s a fucking disaster from top to bottom.

 

One cheap anorexic link sausage that they sliced in half to make it look as if I got two.

Fatty undercooked shit bacon from a pig with aids.

Limp mushrooms.

overcooked eggs.

Cheap Black Pudding.

Shit looking Haggis.

 

That was bad enough but the lot of it was floating on a sea on fucking beans that looked like they had fallen out of somebody’s arse.

 

-75/10

 

straight in the bin.

Looks like its been swept up off Sauchiehall Street. 

[Bjornebye]

2 minutes ago, TheHowieLama said:

Remove the meats -- chop all finely.

 

Place rest of mess (eggs, fungi, beans, bread) into food processor - puree.

 

Put in pot with 4 cups chicken broth - add chopped mixed meat.

 

VOILA!!! Full English soup!

It would be a lot quicker him just shitting into a flask.

[TheHowieLama]

True - but that will not fill a 30 minute episode