Why scowling, play-acting Nani won't be my player of the season

[ReDeus]

A good article in the Mirror*, about time somebody in the media started echoing what every non-ManU fan is saying.

 

Why scowling, play-acting Nani won't be my player of the season

By Oliver Holt

 

A Manchester United fan asked me the other day if I would consider voting for Nani as Footballer of the Year.

 

Well, maybe there is a way of saying this more gently but I’m not going to waste time searching for it...

 

I’d get my back waxed before I voted for Nani.

 

If it was a choice between him and the beach ball that scored against Liverpool last season, I’d take the beach ball.

 

If it was vote Nani or watch a box-set of Ian Wright on Live From Studio Five, I’d settle down in front of the TV.

 

If Ashley Cole said it was either put the cross by the Portuguese or help him with target practice, I’d start running to and fro across the firing range.

 

You’re getting my drift.

 

Nani’s not in my top five this season. He’s not even in my top 20.

 

I don’t like him.

 

I don’t like the way he plays the game.

 

I don’t like his puerility, his petulance or his play-acting.

 

I don’t like his blatant efforts to gain an unfair advantage.

 

I know that, by some criteria, he has had a fine season for United. He has scored crucial goals. He is a fine dribbler. His game has matured.

 

But that’s not enough. Not when you behave the way he does. Not when you do what he did against Spurs this season.

 

Not when you try a delayed dive that could easily have got Younes Kaboul sent off. Not when you then handle the ball as you fall.

 

And not when you take advantage of confusion between the referee and Spurs goalkeeper Heurelho Gomes to kick the ball into an empty net.

 

I don’t care which United players were urging him to do it - it is still probably the most glaring example of bad sportsmanship this season.

 

Nani’s at it all the time. He goes down like he has been shot at the merest excuse. He waves imaginary cards at referees to try to get opponents booked.

 

And here’s the saddest thing - despite the backflips and the cartwheels when he scores, there is actually very little joy in his game.

 

He plays with a scowl. He plays with anger. He plays like everyone is against him. It has become a self-fulfilling prophecy.

 

When he was genuinely hurt by a shocking challenge from Jamie Carragher at Anfield earlier this month, no one believed him at first because of his history.

 

He had a gash in his leg that put him out for a week but he’s cried wolf so often that when he really was a victim of a bad tackle, people thought he was up to his old tricks again.

 

Being anti-Nani isn’t an anti-United thing. Not for me anyway.

 

I wouldn’t vote for Didier Drogba for exactly the same reasons.

 

And, yes, I accept that England players like Steven Gerrard, Michael Owen and Wayne Rooney have been guilty of winning penalties with dives in the past.

 

Cristiano Ronaldo did his share of play-acting, too, but I came to appreciate that he was one of the bravest players in our league.

 

He rode plenty of bad tackles and he took way more punishment than Nani. He was also twice the player that Nani is.

 

It would be nice to think that Nani will change. That he will come to realise that in order to win wider respect in England, he needs to cut out some of the melodrama.

 

Until that happens, he’s not in the reckoning for Footballer of the Year as far as I’m concerned.

 

My vote is going to Scott Parker, for the way he has held West Ham together almost single-handedly as they fight against relegation.

 

Parker has been an inspiration at Upton Park, playing through injury, even playing against Spurs 10 days ago a few hours after the death of his father. He has been a beacon of excellence in a struggling team.

 

He has given everything to the cause. He has done it without moaning and without agitating for a move. He exudes class off the pitch and on it.

 

There are plenty of others for whom you could say the same.

 

My top five this season are Parker, Luka Modric, Jack Wilshere, Nemanja Vidic and John Terry.

 

So here’s a tip for Nani. When you play at Upton Park on Saturday, try and stay on your feet for a couple of minutes.

 

And while you’re there, take a look at how Parker goes about his business.

 

You never know, you might learn something.

* good, except for including John fucking Terry as a top 5 player of the season.

[PaulMcC]

Holt is a shit writer.

[Guest davelfc]

He had a gash in his leg that put him out for a week

 

I've had worse paper cuts. The crying twat.

[Manny]

Still bleating on about the "shocking" challenge I see. He tried to apologise twice, but the crying twat blanked him and then made allegations later in the week that Carra has tried to end his career before, which I don't have any recollection of. Stuart Holden was the victim of far worse circumstance, but still had the good grace to accept an apology and accept his fate. Nani is a fucking tosser, a Ronaldo without the walk to back the talk. Fuck him.

 

Holt's smoking something naming Terry in his top 5, mind, agree with the OP.

[giblinho]

Look, Parker has been unbelievable, but speaking of Holden, why isn't he put in the same esteem as Parker as before his injury I would have said he was clearly Bolton's best player and they're currently in 7th, not 17th

[Trumo]

Look, Parker has been unbelievable, but speaking of Holden, why isn't he put in the same esteem as Parker as before his injury I would have said he was clearly Bolton's best player and they're currently in 7th, not 17th

 

I think this is simply a case of overstating how well Parker has played, because so many of his teammates have been generally appalling this season so he's maybe stood out more. Not that he's not played well, but I don't think he's played as well as people keep saying. In contrast, Holden has done well in a Bolton side that has probably surpassed expectations this year, so the team as a whole has looked very good rather than 1 or 2 individuals. That also goes a long way to explaining why Bolton are 7th and not 17th.

[fowler9]

Adam by far for me but won't get it due to who he plays for

[Beno]

I like Holt simply for the fact that he's the only one in the whole media who is not afraid to call out Ferguson or anyone else from ManUre when they're being a complete twat.He will say what all the other journos are thinking but are too scared to actually print.

[Istvan Kozma]

there is something about reading the name john terry that makes me feel a bit sick inside, like if you bite into some food that has been fried and nothing but oil comes out and makes you feel ill. like that.

[lfctid]

van der saar could get it. he is retiring too. giggs got it a couple years ago. almost like a gesture and if they win the league one of the scum will probably get it. yaya toure and nasri had good first halves of the season but haven't really kicked on...

[Istvan Kozma]

guaranteed player of the year

 

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Edited March 31, 2011 by Istvan Kozma

[RoboRiise]

I've got to admit I had a chuckle the other morning reading that Holt piece over a leisurely breakfast in McDonalds and for a change I was laughing with Holt rather than at him.

 

Funniest thing about those clips above is Ferguson's outrage. In one of them, even Howard the manc is standing over Nani as if to say "seriously son, what the fuck are you doing? Do you know how big a cunt you look right now? Do you even care?" but from Baconface's reaction you'd think five blokes had run onto the pitch and set about him with bats.

 

I mean, it's not even a bit of a pantomime from him for the cameras and the manc fans or something, he's actually hassling the fourth official. I pray for the day one of them has the balls to turn round and say "Ferguson, you're taking the piss. Now get out of my fucking face and sit down or it's a red card. Fuck your knighthood, fuck Big Sam, fuck the LMA - I'm an official, you're a spectator and it's time you got that fact into your alcohol-soaked brain, you dirty little shitbag."

 

You can say what you like about their players but we all know that the old pantshitter could stop them doing that overnight if he wanted to. Instead he revels in it, the smug fucking parasite.

[Philbert]

I've got to admit I had a chuckle the other morning reading that Holt piece over a leisurely breakfast in McDonalds and for a change I was laughing with Holt rather than at him.

 

Funniest thing about those clips above is Ferguson's outrage. In one of them, even Howard the manc is standing over Nani as if to say "seriously son, what the fuck are you doing? Do you know how big a cunt you look right now? Do you even care?" but from Baconface's reaction you'd think five blokes had run onto the pitch and set about him with bats.

 

I mean, it's not even a bit of a pantomime from him for the cameras and the manc fans or something, he's actually hassling the fourth official. I pray for the day one of them has the balls to turn round and say "Ferguson, you're taking the piss. Now get out of my fucking face and sit down or it's a red card. Fuck your knighthood, fuck Big Sam, fuck the LMA - I'm an official, you're a spectator and it's time you got that fact into your alcohol-soaked brain, you dirty little shitbag."

 

You can say what you like about their players but we all know that the old pantshitter could stop them doing that overnight if he wanted to. Instead he revels in it, the smug fucking parasite.

 

"Examples lead us and we shall likely see, such is the Prince, shall his people be". A fish rots from the head down and Ferguson and his piss-poor behaviour is the root cause of his players' shennanigans, and wholly responsible for the reason why Man U are hated. We hate them for what they are, not who they are, and the blame for that lies with a supposed Knight of the Ream.....pitiful:wallbutt: