Depression

[Total Longo]

I've been suffering from depression for the last 15 or so years, and more recently, anxiety. I used to self medicate with alcohol ( I drank daily) , but packed that up in Spring 2014. I know it's daft but for the most part I feel I deserve it and that its my destiny to be unhappy. I feel worthless to the extent that I often avoid looking in the mirror. I love my wife, she's boss, but it's not enough and I often feel lonely. So very lonely.

 

With the booze did you just stop it dead or was it a more gradual process?

[lifetime fan]

Booze for me isn't the problem - I can just make a problem a million times worse.

[VladimirIlyich]

Was.

What are you now,Mr Tumble?

[TheHowieLama]

Chuckle Master

[Kant]

Are any of those mindfulness apps in the Play store any good?

I'm only just starting out with all this stuff - and I haven't tried it myself - but I've heard a lot of people talking about Headspace. Had a quick look at the website there and it does look decent for a free try at least.

[Tony Moanero]

I'm going to have a massive glass of milk. I know that's got frig all to do with anything but I just really wanted to tell someone.

 

Milk.

With the booze did you just stop it dead or was it a more gradual process?

Just stopped it dead. I always liked a drink and was the biggest drinker in my circle of friends, but I'd drink more when experiencing a particularly bad bout of depression. I'd go to the pub at lunchtime and during my half an hour afternoon break and be back in there after work. Things got worse when I wasn't able to work due to long term illness, a situation that spanned a number of years. I'd get to the pub around midday/early afternoon and wouldn't leave until closing time. I'd then chase across town to a pub that was open later or take alcohol home with me. Getting drunk helped me block out a lot of what I had going on in my head but made my anxiety worse. The following day would be murder, and I'd just sit there, browsing shit on the Internet and posting on here until it was time to get ready to go the pub again. Eventually it got to the point where I didn't have the confidence to go to the bar despite knowing all of the staff and would send my wife. I'd be lying if I said I didn't miss the booze, I think about it most days. I guess I miss the short term escapism.

[s(k)aturation]

Chuckle Master

 

Ahem.

 

Überchuckleführer, I'll thank you to knowl

[s(k)aturation]

What are you now,Mr Tumble?

 

Jack Black, more like.

[Champ]

On the subject of mindfulness meditation, I've just started reading this book, which was recommended to me. It comes with a cd to guide you, and it recommends as little as ten minutes a day for eight weeks. Should be more than enough to get started for anyone interested. Much of it is specifically geared towards depression.

I'm off to do my ten minutes now.

Bloody hell, its just arrived! I'll report back

[VladimirIlyich]

Jack Black, more like.

I'd have preferred anybody but that twat,I hate him!

[VladimirIlyich]

Jack Black, more like.

I'd have preferred anybody but that twat,I hate him!

[VladimirIlyich]

 

 

Double post.

 

 

[s(k)aturation]

I'd have preferred anybody but that twat,I hate him!

 

I don't like the comparison either.

 

Bono any better?  

[Ginny]

Bloody hell, its just arrived! I'll report back

Mine just arrived too! It's gonna be pure Zen on here soon - no arguments or anything

[Champ]

Mine just arrived too! It's gonna be pure Zen on here soon - no arguments or anything

The only issue I have, I realise now, is that we dont really have a CD player in the house. I dont suppose they recommend it in the car!

[Jairzinho]

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WY08aXxor20

 

Just watched this having seen others recommend his book.

 

I thought the idea of being brave enough to stay with whatever mood you have was interesting (yet so simple).

[Champ]

Well, that's a bit ironic, me negging you by mistake for such a positive contribution to the thread. My apologies and I'm now offering someone the opportunity to do a good deed and re-setting this man's rep. Well, 2 people, actually

[Ginny]

Well, that's a bit ironic, me negging you by mistake for such a positive contribution to the thread. My apologies and I'm now offering someone the opportunity to do a good deed and re-setting this man's rep. Well, 2 people, actually

 

Done

[Stu Monty]

Well, that's a bit ironic, me negging you by mistake for such a positive contribution to the thread. My apologies and I'm now offering someone the opportunity to do a good deed and re-setting this man's rep. Well, 2 people, actually

I have restored balance.

[Champ]

I have restored balance.

And I am already putting into practice the techniques described in Jairz's vid. Well worth making the time to give it a listen

[melons]

It's worth checking out MIND in your area, they often run mindfulness courses. I've always found it easier to meditate and stay on track in locations outside the home and work place. At home I'm constantly thinking of things that I need to crack on with. I can't say how good MIND's sessions are, but I've never heard anyone come back with negative feedback. 

[El Rojo]

I bought that Williams/Penman book two years ago and still regularly listen to the meditations.

 

To put into context, I'm cynical and lazy and usually disengage from anything like this after a week or two.

 

Well worth the small investment of time and money required, and I always look forward to the ten or twenty minutes of peace and stillness it brings.

[s(k)aturation]

I have restored balance.

 

Balance is no fun.

[Ezekiel 25:17]

I havent checked any of the post dates here but if any of the bouts of depression have coincided with when I stopped posting I wouldn't be at all surprised, and for that, I apologise.

[Ezekiel 25:17]

On a serious note I have a lot of experience with this mainly brought on through bereavement, I've gotten through it all without medication and I'm great now, in a way I feel grateful that I've experienced extreme lows because I no longer fear them, and when I do feel low or anxious, I know what it is, instead of spending the years wondering why I couldnt sort my head out.