Cake Cunt - Leave a Review

[stringvest]

ask her if the vegetable peeler can be used as a razor

[VladimirIlyich]

Tell her Gordon Ramsay is short a cake maker.

[Captain Turdseye]

It seems she’s ignoring me now. I might have to order a cake.

[Anubis]

It would be quite funny to bake a really shit ‘sorry your cake business shut down’ cake.

Possibly going to give this a go tonight. Will keep you posted.

[Numero Veinticinco]

Possibly going to give this a go tonight. Will keep you posted.

It’d be amazing.

[Captain Turdseye]

Yes!

 

She posted them for sale for £20 in three different groups. I’ve just gone onto a different one with that link and offered her £3.50 for them.

Just upped my offer to £3.80 and she said she’d sold them to someone else. I asked how much she charged someone for an eight quid set of knives and she deleted the entire post.

 

Anubis, please incorporate a knife engraved with £7.99 into your cake design.

[TheHowieLama]

Alot riding on this Anubis -- don't fuck it up.

[Anubis]

ANNOUNCEMENT

 

The Devils And Angels Cakes And Bakes tribute cake will debut on this thread at 7pm tonight.

 

Quite frankly, I feel as though I have captured the very essence of Amy's work - combining a heartfelt and touching message, together with attention to detail which celebrates her greatest hits. Even the form of the overall cake is a metaphor for Amy's entire business.

 

I think you guys are going to love it.

 

Anubis.

[Numero Veinticinco]

I can’t wait.

[Captain Turdseye]

Oh my god. I wasn’t even this excited before the CL final.

 

Will there be a GF invasion of the Facebook page or am I gonna be left to do that on my own?

[TheHowieLama]

Somebody ping Usher so the site doesn't crash

[Anubis]

Unfortunately the only access I have to Facebook is as the firm's page admin, so you'll have to do the honours.

[Captain Turdseye]

Unfortunately the only access I have to Facebook is as the firm's page admin, so you'll have to do the honours.

We’re gonna need volunteers or else everyone in this town will think I’m a ‘orrible cunt.

 

My bird has been sharing the cakes on a Facebook page called ‘Dafuq is Dis?’ and Amy’s been getting rave reviews on there as well.

[Numero Veinticinco]

It’s the first time I actually went and had a look. I feel like such a cunt. Some of them are fucking horrendous and the English used in the reply to the latest one is pretty horrific.

[Dr Nowt]

It’s the first time I actually went and had a look. I feel like such a cunt. Some of them are fucking horrendous and the English used in the reply to the latest one is pretty horrific.

For some reason that just reminded me of the old Adam West Batman series.

 

I remember watching one as a kid where he’d been sent a ransom letter, and at one stage stops reading it to complain “The grammar is atrocious.”

[Numero Veinticinco]

For some reason that just reminded me of the old Adam West Batman series.

 

I remember watching one as a kid where he’d been sent a ransom letter, and at one stage stops reading it to complain “The grammar is atrocious.”

 

[Numero Veinticinco]

[Anubis]

Ladies and gentlemen, I give you the Devil's & Angels Tribute Cake.

 

Note how I have used Amy's signature lettering. Thrill as we communicate our heartfelt apology in a language she will understand - text speak. And it would not be appropriate if we didn't enquire after her wellbeing, and what better way to do so than TLW's favourite Facebook enquiry?

 

 

 

Note the jagged cracks and crumbling cake, as though the cake has experienced a cakequake, which stands as a metaphor for Amy's cracked and crumbling business.

 

 

 

And to top it off, I have included nuanced references to Amy's greatest work. Severed unicorn heads remind us of the smashed unicorn cake.

 

 

 

Around the rim of the cake we have the famous Formula 1 cake half-poo-tyres. A fitting tribute I'm sure you'll agree.

 

[TheHowieLama]

Straight to the Hall of Fame this 

[Captain Turdseye]

That’s fucking superb. I don’t think anyone here could argue if you said you were giving up practising law to go full-time in the cake game.

 

What’s the price tag on that one?

[TheHowieLama]

It says 7.99 - each one comes with a free knife

[Dr Nowt]

It says £7.99 but he’s selling it for a score.

 

It’s what she would have wanted.

[Dr Nowt]

[TheHowieLama]

Now 6 and counting

[Captain Turdseye]

Mrs Turdseye has linked the thread in the FB group they’ve been discussing the cakes in.