Anti-match report

[Spy Bee]

I couldn't go to the ressies tonight as I had promised to go with a friend to watch Lemar. Here is my match report of the evening...

 

 

Lemar would be better if he were blind.

 

I've been to see Lemar kick off tour tonight in Rhyl with by mate Jenbo. It was a funny old night and I'm glad to report that I managed to get through the whole evening without shouting out "Lemar, what's your surname!".

 

We arrived to a rather bizarre scene as Lemar's support act appeared to have been dragged in from the local karaoke bar. She assured us this was not the case and that she had "travelled down from Glasgow" and she was very tired. If this hadn't whipped the crowd up into enough of a frenzy, she went on to inform us that she has three children aged 12, 10 and 8 and that sometimes makes you very tired. We went for a pint while we waited for the man with no surname to begin.

 

I'm not a particular fan of Lemar, but tonight his biggest fan in the world ever was there. I mean this guy was a big big big Lemar fan. No I'm not saying he was fat, he was immensely passionate. The guy must have been 45, he had short spikey grey hair and wore glasses. As soon as Lemar entered the fray he was on his feet and he really looked like he was living the dream. He insisted on clapping along even when there was no discernable beat and wore the expression of a man determined not to let the greatest moment of his life pass him by.

 

He didn't. When Lemar belted out what was obviously his favourite song he began to sob, almost uncontrolabley. He wept and wept and the tears poured down his cheeks. The man had achieved his destiny. I think it's great that music can touch people, but for this great moment to happen in front of 900 screaming girls and 120 people who had nothing better to do on a Tuesday evening was quite unexpected.

 

Oh yeah Lemar and blindness. He's makes a better Stevie Wonder than he is a Michael Jackson or a Justin Timberlake. His voice is brilliant (although more masturbation that emotional attachment) and his balads are very nice. He can dance some, but he'd be better off sticking to what he's best at.

 

Lemar enjoyed himself "Rhyl is the place to be!" he said, assuring us that this was not irony with the addition of "No seriously!".

 

Anyway, not a bad evening. A good warm up to Damien Rice in Berlin on Thursday.

 

PS. If the answer is blowing in the wind, is the answer and empty packet of wotsits?

[Stu Monty]

Where did he play then, the fucking Sun Centre?

[Spy Bee]

Where did he play then, the fucking Sun Centre?

 

Pretty much. The Pavilion, which is attached to it. It's not a bad little venue actually. I'd like to see someone good there.

 

It's not advertised as a date on his website, so he must do a couple of testers before he goes to bigger venues.

[Spy Bee]

I have no defence. I did go and see Lemar. If I shag a whore in Berlin will that get me my masculinity back?

 

I'm not going to, but I'll say I did if I can be a man again.

[Kurt]

I have no defence. I did go and see Lemar. If I shag a whore in Berlin will that get me my masculinity back?

 

I'm not going to, but I'll say I did if I can be a man again.

 

You can say it...and in the words of George Costanza "It`s not a lie if YOU believe it"

[Alan Sex]