Someone's having a real laugh - gollum?

[The Guest]

If i was moriiniho i'd do a gerrard in reverse. Make a massive bid for rooney, offer him astronomical wages, have him down at stamford bridge and then right before the season starts send him back to manchester. Say he failed the medical, not fit enough. That'd fuck em.

 

That would just end up motivating Rooney. The best thing that could happen is if he stays there and they don't put any more bids in.

 

He will be livid and he's a stupid cunt. He will cause problems and the other players will get pissed off with him.

 

If Chelsea somehow get him I think it would be a new lease of life for him.

[Adebisi]

Bony is gonna smash their arseholes in on the first day.

[Gnasher]

This will be the mancs first 5 results under moyes... I'm good at predicting, i nearly got a football coupon in once

 

Swansea 0-1 defeat

Chelsea 0-1 defeat

Liverpool 0-2 defeat

Palace 1-0 win dodgy penalty

Man city 0-2 defeat

 

Moyes then takes the vacant managerial position at Preston.

[MLB]

I'm not getting my hopes up about them collapsing just yet. Okay, their work in the transfer market has been terrible and they have had a couple of poor results, but let's not get carried away. At least, not until they've lost a few league games and their fans go into meltdown.

[Captain]

I don't need them to collapse. Just need them to be poorer than before, which they will be.

 

Sometimes I actually forget that the vile, old cunt isn't their manager anymore.

 

Hooray!

[Timão]

I don't need them to collapse. Just need them to be poorer than before, which they will be.

 

Sometimes I actually forget that the vile, old cunt isn't their manager anymore.

 

Hooray!

 

With you on that, you do not want them to collapse, a slow, steady decline would do.

 

Way to early to say that is going to happen, but I'd much rather have Moyes manage them than Ferguson.

[VERBAL DIARRHEA]

I don't need them to collapse. Just need them to be poorer than before, which they will be.

 

Sometimes I actually forget that the vile, old cunt isn't their manager anymore.

 

Hooray!

 

I fear the Emperor lives and Vader is just a wheezing yes man.

[rainman]

20th August 2012

 

1st game of season

 

Blueshite 1 v evil empire 0

 

Unfortunately, that didn't work out too well for us, did it.

[Captain]

Do you have a point, Raymond?

[setreal]

No but he's good with numbers.

[razor]

Sometimes I actually forget that the vile, old cunt isn't their manager anymore.

 

Do you think their on-tour defeats would get more than a cursory mention if he was still there?

 

The media have turned, there is no doubt about it. They've even admitted "Would Sir Alex have been asked questions as directly as this?" when they were having a field day in a press conference.

 

If he was in charge they'd have got their transfer targets, too.

 

Now all we need is the refs/FA to feel that same sense that the prison door's been opened and they're free to roam the palace. Smash it to pieces, boys - it feels good!

 

 

 

 

 

It has begun...

[Gnasher]

A couple of months ago they had..

 

Director.. David Gill

Manager.. Fergurson

Coach .. Some shit hot dutch fella who's name I can't remember

 

Now they've got..

 

Director.. Wood wood?

Manager.. Moyes

Coach.. Phil fucking neville

[Trumo]

As much as I want to take the piss, that club have a habit of landing on their feet in the very same situations that cause things to go tits-up at Liverpool. They might not have the overlord in direct charge but he will doubtless still be pulling a few strings in the background.

 

Rather than a sudden implosion, I would also prefer them to undergo a steady decline of the sort where hopes are built up and dashed in a seemingly endless period of transition. Liverpool need to get their shit together to take advantage regardless.

 

If the Mancs do begin to struggle, I hope all those gobshites in the media and on forums who kept taking about giving a manager time while Hodgson was busy laying waste to LFC remember their words when it comes to Moyes. Even the overlord spoke about giving him time, and the club gave Moyes a 6-year deal implying the very same, so it would be the height of hypocrisy if these very same people start calling for change after a few indifferent/shite results and performances.

[Garrincha]

Moyes is a good manager, but he's not good enough to mimic Ferguson, he won't keep the media at bay as Ferguson did and he will never garner the respect of that squad like Ferguson had. His two main mistakes thus far are the hiring of the Everton back room staff and aiming too high with his transfer targets. Thiago was more their level, but the Fabregas / Modric interest is going nowhere. He'll fail to attract those types of players which will have a negative effect on other potential targets because they'll see players rejecting the club.

[razor]

As much as I want to take the piss, that club have a habit of landing on their feet in the very same situations that cause things to go tits-up at Liverpool.

 

Fear not, my friend. I know there have been little glimmers of hope that it will end - freak results or departing players, the odd media crisis or fan backlash.

 

But this is the mother of all falls. Mountains are overthrown, cliffs shall topple and walls will crumble to the ground.

 

For this, THIS IS THE ONE.

[scudger99]

You just know that some bugger will quote that back to you if Gollum manages to land either the Prem or CL next season.

Not that it's likely, but shit has a tendency to happen.

[razor]

You just know that some bugger will quote that back to you if Gollum manages to land either the Prem or CL next season.

Not that it's likely, but shit has a tendency to happen.

 

Feel welcome to do so, Scudgy, lad.

 

[YOUTUBE]-aqY-8cMVdg[/YOUTUBE]

 

*Reclines in comfy chair with expensive cigar and large, crisp brandy.*

[aladdinsane]

As much as I want to take the piss, that club have a habit of landing on their feet in the very same situations that cause things to go tits-up at Liverpool. They might not have the overlord in direct charge but he will doubtless still be pulling a few strings in the background.

 

Rather than a sudden implosion, I would also prefer them to undergo a steady decline of the sort where hopes are built up and dashed in a seemingly endless period of transition. Liverpool need to get their shit together to take advantage regardless.

 

If the Mancs do begin to struggle, I hope all those gobshites in the media and on forums who kept taking about giving a manager time while Hodgson was busy laying waste to LFC remember their words when it comes to Moyes. Even the overlord spoke about giving him time, and the club gave Moyes a 6-year deal implying the very same, so it would be the height of hypocrisy if these very same people start calling for change after a few indifferent/shite results and performances.

 

I'm hoping that his ego will get in charge of any rational and he will actually not interfere and let Moyes fail, thus immortalising himself even further in folklore.

[rainman]

Do you have a point, Raymond?

 

sorry i was so unclear.

 

the point that i was hoping would be understood, was that, although the evil empire lost their 1st game of the season to a load of shite, (and we all laughed and rejoiced), sorrowfully, both sides subsequently finished above us in the table at the end of the season.

 

hope that clarifies any confusion.

 

ps

 

are you any relation to captain thain?

[Captain]

I don't really see the point in comparing to last season for obvious reasons.

[Gnasher]

Moyes imo has already made some glaring errors...

 

1. He's let the coach leave

2. He's handled the rooney situation badly

3. He thinks he can bully and manipulate the press like fergerson

4. He's gave senior coaching roles to the likes of neville and giggs, he also offered a coaching role to scholes,, why? to curry favour with the players, get them onside, imo it shows weakness, none have first class coaching experience, it's a short term fix to suit david moyes.

6. Showing up his inexperience at the top end of the transfer market, going public on targets then missing them ( just hope he don't sign bale)

7. Lack of world football knowledge, he said his last opponents should offer " a reasonable test" as they were mid table in their league. Man utd ended up getting beat.

 

I can honestly see this being a crash a burn job.

[Gnasher]

I forgot number 8

 

8. Arse licking to fergie

 

" he TOLD me i was to be the next man utd boss" "I was dressed in jeans when i went to his house" and " i thought he was going to tell me im taking one of your players"

 

Shut the fuck up you sycophantic weak willed cunt. Gives the impression to the players he can be bullied.

[rainman]

No but he's good with numbers.

 

nice one centurion. like it. like it.

[rainman]

I don't need them to collapse. Just need them to be poorer than before, which they will be.

 

Sometimes I actually forget that the vile, old cunt isn't their manager anymore.

 

Hooray!

 

with you on most of that, but it would still be funny to see them collapse completely.

 

i still remember getting battered as a team, and me individually, at old toilet the season they got relegated.

 

unfortunately, they came back.

 

they were poorer than before, last season, and although they got off to a weak start, they still recovered to finish above us.

 

i think that the point that i'm trying to make is, that despite some set backs, they have an annoying habit of finishing above us in recent times.

 

in order for us to reverse this we must get stronger, not them get weaker.

[Guest San Don]

Gollum the dinosaur!! What was it he said? "It wasnt like this at the shite"!

 

Robin van Persie's pre-season injury niggle is down to 'dinosaur coaching' methods, says Dutch fitness expert - Telegraph

 

Van Persie was withdrawn at half-time during United’s friendly in Japan on Tuesday because he had experienced tightness in a thigh.

 

Moyes said the substitution was pre*cautionary and that he expected the striker to be fine, but the new Manchester United manager was still subjected to stinging criticism from Raymond Verheijen, who has worked with Barcelona, Chelsea and Manchester City among others and has a reputation for being outspoken.

 

Writing on his Twitter account, Verheijin noted that Moyes had previously said United had ‘overtrained’ Van Persie at the start of pre-season.

 

He wrote: “In Sydney Moyes said: ‘We’ve overtrained Robin this week to build up his fitness’. [in Japan] he picked up muscle injury. It really makes you wonder how these prehistoric training methods can still take place at the highest level.

 

"The only way to solve this problem in Jurassic Park is to improve education of these dinosaur coaches, fitness clowns & scientific cowboys.

 

"All over the world in pre-season you see the pattern ‘overtraining-fatigue-injuries’. Always avoid accumulation of fatigue in pre-season.

 

"But as long as most dinosaurs are still in denial & ignore how things develop in other countries, nothing will ever change in Jurassic Park. Obviously, players like RVP should learn to protect themselves better against ‘overtraining’ & ‘punishing training’.”

 

Moyes admits he will be forced to rely on Ryan Giggs to guide him through the early stages of United’s Champions League campaign after admitting he has much to learn about the competition.

 

Moyes, who suffered a 4-2 aggregate defeat with Everton against Villarreal in the 2005-06 qualifying stages, will experience the Champions League proper for the first time as a manager when United begin their group stage fixtures in September.

 

Having taken charge of Everton on 26 occasions in Europe, Moyes was unable to go beyond the last 16 of the Uefa Cup or Europa League, but he takes charge of United with the club aiming to build a squad capable of winning the European Cup for a fourth time.

 

But while conceding that he will go into the Champions League as a relative rookie this season, Moyes believes that player-coach Giggs, who has more than 150 European appearances to his name, will be a crucial sounding board during the group stages.

 

“For me, the Champions League will be a thrill, but I’m going to have to learn a lot quickly,” Moyes said. “That’s where I’m looking to the likes of Ryan Giggs and a few players around me for the things which I need to be told about.

 

“It’s not all about the playing side of it – I’ve been in the Champions League [qualifiers], watched loads of games and managed in the Europa League – everybody has to start somewhere.”

 

With efforts continuing at United to lure Barcelona midfielder Cesc Fabregas to Old Trafford, Moyes, in Osaka ahead of Friday’s friendly in Japan, remains hopeful of adding to the squad he inherited from Sir Alex Ferguson before the start of the season.

 

But having admitted that he must win a trophy quickly, Moyes is determined to add to the club’s history of success in Europe.

 

“The history of this club is immersed in Europe and I think to win one of the big European tournaments would always been seen as something special,” Moyes said.

 

“Winning your own domestic league is very important, but winning the Champions League has become very important, for the country and Premier League as well.

 

“I think the year when Manchester United and Chelsea played in the final, everyone connected to football in this country stuck their chest out.

 

“It was the German teams this year, in the past it’s been the Spanish teams. I genuinely think there’s a swell of pride from our country that we want the British teams to do really well.

 

“But I’ve got to say I’m really looking forward to it and hopefully we can do well this season and I do think it’s a much more open competition than it has been in the past.

 

“Even from the draw – if you don’t get a particularly good draw it can become a struggle whichever part of the world you’re playing in now.”