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Everything posted by scudger99

  1. scudger99

    Philippe Coutinho

    Viagra ?
  2. scudger99

    Computers and consoles - what have you got?

    Got an old Commodore 64 in the loft with a 5.25" floppy disk drive. Used to play strip poker on it, haven't even tried to power it up in years.
  3. Did you intentionally call Zaha Haha ? Or was that your take on Arsenal's offer ?
  4. Jesus. I'm sitting here waiting for my own 15 year old son to get home after 4 days away and that hits hard. Fair play to all those involved who went out of their way to make his last days more tolerable. Sad indeed.
  5. scudger99

    Messi vs Ronaldo

    Messi for me. Ronaldo in a straightener though.
  6. scudger99

    Summer 2019 Transfer Thread

    Did the window close early or something ?
  7. scudger99

    2018/19 Season Report Card - Dejan Lovren

    The likes of Lovren and Henderson have had to put up with their share of detractors, and have stuck to their guns and never wilted, to their eternal credit I wouldn't be looking to let Lovren go anywhere just yet. We've got a shitload of games next season, and the same fans who want Lovren gone now will be bellyaching like fuck when the injuries take their toll and we're putting Fabinho at centre back again. There's very little to be gained in Lovren leaving, other than to keep a particlular group of sad cunts happy. He's a proper positive character, just what Klopp wants around the place.
  8. scudger99

    Jurgen Norbert Klopp

    Had to put my glasses on to see that fucker ! The horrors of middle age.....
  9. scudger99

    Jurgen Norbert Klopp

    The bird with him is all Gary Neville-ish in his presence. The teutonic James Bond 006.
  10. When I saw that Kane was starting. I knew their talisman would be well off the pace. And that we had 11 talismans on the pitch. Never really had any doubts, but Origi scoring was the moment the celebrations started for real in my household.
  11. scudger99

    2018/19 Season Report Card - Andy Robertson

    Made fae girders....... I remember being on the Anfield tour in our Treble year, and folks round Anfield were bringing up the old chestnut of "we won't win the league without a Scotsman in the side". I honestly thought at the time that Gary Mac would fill that role. Step forward Mad Dog. I'd fucking love a t-shirt with a picture of that moment where Robbo twatted Messi as he was running past him. I reckon that was the moment when Messi realized that he was in a real game with players who didn't give a flying fuck about his status and it was about to go Pete Tong.......
  12. scudger99

    Other Football - 2018/19 Season

    "Ross Barkley, as good as Steven Gerrard". I'm going to rename Stones to Stoned, the cunt plays like he had a couple of tokes just before kick off.
  13. scudger99

    Alisson Becker

    He doesn't have to pretend he's a Champions League winner and number 1 goalkeeper for what is currently the best side in Europe. After that, nothing matters a fuck.
  14. scudger99

    Mane: I am very happy in the Premier League 

    By kick off tonight at least one of the clickbait sites will advertise that interview as "Mane wants to emulate his hero and be a Barca player next season". And fuckwits will read it and believe it.
  15. scudger99

    Andrew Robertson

    Cockmastery at its finest.
  16. scudger99

    Andrew Robertson

    Hoose !
  17. scudger99


    A few tinnies of a Saturday night then get the Volcano vape out when the kids are out of the picture. Did loads of acid and speed in my early twenties, fuck that sitting up all night shit nowadays ! The smoking side of it puts me right off now, hence the vapouriser. Far cleaner and better effects too.
  18. scudger99


    I've kept spiders and snakes in the past, but these yellow and black striped jersey wearing pointy arsed little bastards are one creature I cannot bear. I've got scar tissue on one arm where a wasp stung me repeatedly as a young boy and it went sceptic. My brother ended up with a wasp nest in his loft that was 4 feet across, and the guy who came to deal with it told him "when you leave for work in the morning, don't slam the door. And FUCKING RUN". He wasn't joking either, these fuckers go mad to protect their nest and enough stings can cause the body to go into shock. I've stood on a dead wasp and the cunt still stung my foot. Spiteful,baleful horrible little bastards. What part do they play in the ecological chain ? Isn't this one species that the planet would benefit from having wiped out ?
  19. scudger99

    Alisson Becker

    Shit post, must do better.
  20. scudger99

    Tommy Smith

    My heart sank when I saw the thread title. I still remember an interview with a young Paul Mariner of Ipswich (?) when Tommy was getting towards the latter stage of his career, and Mariner said "he's a smashing player, getting tackled by him is like getting hit by a runaway coal truck !". Underrated as a player, his header in 1977 had me diving off the couch screaming like a fucking loon. I am genuinely gutted tonight, what an absolute fucking downer to start the weekend. Thanks for the memories Tommy, you will be sadly missed.
  21. scudger99

    Can: Training under Klopp was difficult

    I find the thing about the work ethic a tad surprising, but it's what separates the elite players from the rest. That drive to continually improve and push themselves to the limit. I don't think Can likes to be pushed out of his comfort zone, so he's more Emre Won't than Emre Can. We haven't missed him, apart from those glossy locks.
  22. scudger99

    Mohamed Salah

    Results would suggest otherwise. But I agree with the general point being made. If Salah was playing to the same incredible standard he was last season we would probably be top of the table and 3 or more points clear to boot.
  23. scudger99

    Southampton (A) 5/4/2019

    When Keita equalized it was like he'd just found a fresh turd in his breakfast. Cunt of a man.