What constitutes the perfect cooked breakfast?

[Bjornebye]

Fit 

[TheHowieLama]

The plate is trying to crack itself open to get away from that.

[Spy Bee]

On 09/03/2024 at 14:29, tokyojoe said:

Bacon, black pud, fried bread, two Braughing bangers , egg and mushrooms. As is obvious to the connoisseurs on here NO BEANS!!! I had to take the pic on the sofa or one of the moggs would have made a start on it.

On September 19th, 2008, an event occurred at the Large Hadron Collider, which is known as The Quench Incident. This has been explained away as being nothing more than a routine overheating of superconducting magnets, but, if you think about it, this moment corresponds directly with the time that the entire world began it's journey to The Abyss. I have thus far, thought that this was quite an outlandish conspiracy theory, but the above picture has confirmed to me that The Quench Incident, was in fact the beginning of the end, and that there is indeed no hope for humanity, or indeed existence itself.

[Fugitive]

3 hours ago, Bjornebye said:

Fit 

You on rations, mate?

[Bjornebye]

4 minutes ago, Fugitive said:

You on rations, mate?

Trying to eat less carbs. Gay I know 

[Elite]

Like the WW2 version of Keto.

[Fugitive]

51 minutes ago, Bjornebye said:

Trying to eat less carbs. Gay I know 

The plate belongs on a ceiling with a chandelier hanging from it, Liberace.

[Pidge]

That plate would look fantastic with some orange bean drippings clagging up the rim.

[Barrington Womble]

So this tasted a whole load better than it looks. From a place on city road in London called shepherdess cafe. £12.40 including a cup of tea. Believe it or not, that's 2 eggs (one directly on top of the other) and the sausage looks like a cheap chippy one, but it wasn't it was a decent one. It looks 2/10, tastes more 6/10. 

 

[Bjornebye]

1 minute ago, Barrington Womble said:

So this tasted a whole load better than it looks. From a place on city road in London called shepherdess cafe. £12.40 including a cup of tea. Believe it or not, that's 2 eggs (one directly on top of the other) and the sausage looks like a cheap chippy one, but it wasn't it was a decent one. It looks 2/10, tastes more 6/10. 

 

Believe it or not? More like Ripley’s Believe It Or Not 

[cloggypop]

13 minutes ago, Barrington Womble said:

So this tasted a whole load better than it looks. From a place on city road in London called shepherdess cafe. £12.40 including a cup of tea. Believe it or not, that's 2 eggs (one directly on top of the other) and the sausage looks like a cheap chippy one, but it wasn't it was a decent one. It looks 2/10, tastes more 6/10. 

 

 

The sausage looks like a duck billed platypus. 

[Mudface]

27 minutes ago, cloggypop said:

 

The sausage looks like a duck billed platypus's syphilitic dick.

 

[TheHowieLama]

52 minutes ago, Barrington Womble said:

So this tasted a whole load better than it looks. From a place on city road in London called shepherdess cafe. £12.40 including a cup of tea. Believe it or not, that's 2 eggs (one directly on top of the other) and the sausage looks like a cheap chippy one, but it wasn't it was a decent one. It looks 2/10, tastes more 6/10. 

 

[Mook]

48 minutes ago, cloggypop said:

 

The sausage looks like a duck billed platypus. 

 

Ha ha, it fucking does as well.

 

Quite a good opening lyric to a song that.

[Champ]

11 minutes ago, Mook said:

 

Ha ha, it fucking does as well.

 

Quite a good opening lyric to a song that.

Where do you stand on the bacon, @Mook

[Bjornebye]

3 minutes ago, Champ said:

Where do you stand on the bacon, @Mook

Looks like he already has 

[Champ]

3 minutes ago, Bjornebye said:

Looks like he already has 

Nah, I think it looks all right

[Bjornebye]

2 minutes ago, Champ said:

Nah, I think it looks all right

I’d like it cooked more evenly myself 

[Fugitive]

1 hour ago, Barrington Womble said:

So this tasted a whole load better than it looks. From a place on city road in London called shepherdess cafe. £12.40 including a cup of tea. Believe it or not, that's 2 eggs (one directly on top of the other) and the sausage looks like a cheap chippy one, but it wasn't it was a decent one. It looks 2/10, tastes more 6/10. 

 

 

[cloggypop]

39 minutes ago, Mook said:

 

Ha ha, it fucking does as well.

 

Quite a good opening lyric to a song that.

 

If only Arthur Lee was still alive. 

[Champ]

18 minutes ago, Bjornebye said:

I’d like it cooked more evenly myself 

I reckon it’s been cooked in a frying pan. I like that it’s not done to the usual crisp

[Bjornebye]

3 minutes ago, Champ said:

I reckon it’s been cooked in a frying pan. I like that it’s not done to the usual crisp

The fat looks like the last heat it saw was when the pig went outside for a wee 

[an tha]

2 hours ago, Barrington Womble said:

So this tasted a whole load better than it looks. From a place on city road in London called shepherdess cafe. £12.40 including a cup of tea. Believe it or not, that's 2 eggs (one directly on top of the other) and the sausage looks like a cheap chippy one, but it wasn't it was a decent one. It looks 2/10, tastes more 6/10. 

 

Denial is not just a river in Egypt...

[Mook]

2 hours ago, Champ said:

Where do you stand on the bacon, @Mook

 

Looks good to me.

[Remmie]

On 18/03/2024 at 07:09, YorkshireRed said:

Chessington World of Adventures, resort hotel. 
 

Working here this week. 
 

I’m already a bit miffed as there’s loads of teenagers stopping here this week. I think they’re on some kind of school trip. 
 

Anyway, the boisterous cunts were rampaging up and down the corridors until gone 9.00 pm last night. 
 

I usually stay in the Premier Inn, round the corner, but thought I’d just stay here this time.
 

All I can say about the breakfast is that the one in the Premier Inn is better.

 

4/10 (point lost as I’m sat looking over towards where the giraffes live and the lazy, lanky, fuckers are still in bed. 

Those beans will slowly envelop the poor egg like a python slowly suffocating it's prey. The egg stood no chance and came to a frankly horrific and sickening end. 

 

Such a proud little orange yolk standing in defiance against the wretched, luminous orange sewer spew of oblivion. 

 

They say a picture says more than a thousand words and this is worse than a thousand of the most harrowing words you can find like tory donor, crypto advice and welcome to Bolton. Oh the humanity!