The world of a woman.

[Fugitive]

Quite within your rights to kick her out on the streets, or walk out yourself.

Her tits make her invincible.

[Rico1304]

I’m away with work tonight on a dorks woo in Leeds. Just phoned the wife and it went to answerphone. Instead of saying ‘Just got back to my room’ I said ‘just got back to our room’. There may be trouble ahead.

[tokyojoe]

I’m away with work tonight on a dorks woo in Leeds. Just phoned the wife and it went to answerphone. Instead of saying ‘Just got back to my room’ I said ‘just got back to our room’. There may be trouble ahead.

Yep. You're in the shit now mate.

[Elite]

Yep. You're in the shit now mate.

Probably Louie Spences..

[Paulie Dangerously]

ToddleD had a christmas fair at one of the Nurseries she goes to last night.  She was looking forward to it all day to see Father Christmas and have some cake.  Unfortunately one of the "festive surprises" was someone dressed up in one of those rubber, realistic dinosaur costumes.  ToddleD has serious beef with anything that should be on a television presenting itself to her in real life.  People dressed as Mickey Mouse in town is another example of this.  True to form she went batshit and refused to sing carols and see father christmas and it was pretty much a stressful hour thanks to Denver the Dinosaur.

 

We ended up indulging in a Wethies curry club later with my mum & dad who were also there when my mum pipes up "I know it's frustrating she didn't like the dinosaur, but when you think about it it's great she has a natural caution of it because it'll help her stay safe"

 

Yes mum, it'll help her stay safe from all the marauding prehistoric dinosaurs we have knocking about L9 

[Elite]

My missus is at work this morning and I'm off so I had to sort out the baby and get my daughter ready for school. Get everything sorted in a bit of a mad rush and am about to get the kids in the car for the school run but can't find the keys anywhere, text my missus to ask where's shes put them and they are in her coat pocket that shes wearing for work. So she has both sets of car/house keys on her, so I am basically under house arrest all day and can't take the baby anywhere.

 

Luckily one of the other school mums picked up my daughter.

[VladimirIlyich]

ToddleD had a christmas fair at one of the Nurseries she goes to last night. She was looking forward to it all day to see Father Christmas and have some cake. Unfortunately one of the "festive surprises" was someone dressed up in one of those rubber, realistic dinosaur costumes. ToddleD has serious beef with anything that should be on a television presenting itself to her in real life. People dressed as Mickey Mouse in town is another example of this. True to form she went batshit and refused to sing carols and see father christmas and it was pretty much a stressful hour thanks to Denver the Dinosaur.

 

We ended up indulging in a Wethies curry club later with my mum & dad who were also there when my mum pipes up "I know it's frustrating she didn't like the dinosaur, but when you think about it it's great she has a natural caution of it because it'll help her stay safe"

 

Yes mum, it'll help her stay safe from all the marauding prehistoric dinosaurs we have knocking about L9

Kids are weird,and their female relatives even weirder!

I remember as a very young kid going to a Black and White Minstrels show and being terrified and crying my eyes out for no apparent reason.

*This was in no way a racist reaction as I spent my early years in the largely multicultural are of L8 and our family had black friends going back years.* It could also have been that those Black and White Minstrels shows were always popular on the telly back then and when fiction meets fact it can scramble a little kid's brain.

[Mook]

I'm still absolutely petrified of anyone dressed up like that. We get them at the shopping centre by me all the time & I'll go way out of my way to avoid anyone on stilts, dressed up as a dinosaur or Super Mario or whatever.

 

Scary bastards, no wonder kids start crying when they see them.

[Elite]

Bet you aren't scared of Penelope Cruz dressed as Mario.

[Elite]

I am sure the ones of you that have kids are aware of this Naughty Elf fad that happens every december.

 

Now I don't mind it as it's a bit of fun for the kids and you can get a bit creative so your kid has something to laugh at in the morning when they get up.

 

However, I fucking hate that it's turned into a competition for likes on Facebook with parents more interested in how many likes/comments they get on their 'Elfs Antics' of the previous night than it being a bit of fun between them and their kids.

 

I posted this on here cos' it's women who are the main culprit.

[Pureblood]

Sharenting on Facebook is through the roof.  

[Jairzinho]

Yes but don't forget women can survive without a man.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Or so they claim................

Yes, until they want someone to open a jar.

[lifetime fan]

Girl I work with hasn’t shut up for the last month telling everyone she’s going to the Dominican Rupiblic for Christmas.

 

Came back from the post office with a thousand pounds worth of euros.

[General Dryness]

Girl I work with hasn’t shut up for the last month telling everyone she’s going to the Dominican Rupiblic for Christmas.

 

Came back from the post office with a thousand pounds worth of euros.

How do these people cope with everyday challenges like getting dressed, or food shopping?

[VladimirIlyich]

Reading this thread its so easy to understand why our country voted for Brexit. I'm sure a lot of women thought it was a new breakfst cereal.

[Trumo]

How do these people cope with everyday challenges like getting dressed, or food shopping breathing?

.

[tokyojoe]

Girl I work with hasn’t shut up for the last month telling everyone she’s going to the Dominican Rupiblic for Christmas.

 

Came back from the post office with a thousand pounds worth of euros.

 

Magnificent.

[Creator Supreme]

Couple of knobheads in our place had Christmas jumpers on yesterday but not too many, one of the female managers though - dressed as Mrs Claus!!!

 

I don't know how I managed to get through the day without punching her stupid fucking head in!

[Elite]

Girl I work with hasn’t shut up for the last month telling everyone she’s going to the Dominican Rupiblic for Christmas.

 

Came back from the post office with a thousand pounds worth of euros.

I'd ask at the exchange to be sure no matter where I was going, its a no brainer to somewhere like that.

[Chip Butty]

ToddleD had a christmas fair at one of the Nurseries she goes to last night.  She was looking forward to it all day to see Father Christmas and have some cake.  Unfortunately one of the "festive surprises" was someone dressed up in one of those rubber, realistic dinosaur costumes.  ToddleD has serious beef with anything that should be on a television presenting itself to her in real life.  People dressed as Mickey Mouse in town is another example of this.  True to form she went batshit and refused to sing carols and see father christmas and it was pretty much a stressful hour thanks to Denver the Dinosaur.

 

We ended up indulging in a Wethies curry club later with my mum & dad who were also there when my mum pipes up "I know it's frustrating she didn't like the dinosaur, but when you think about it it's great she has a natural caution of it because it'll help her stay safe"

 

Yes mum, it'll help her stay safe from all the marauding prehistoric dinosaurs we have knocking about L9 

 

I take it you're discounting the Bull, the Windsor and Wethies in the L9 catchment area. 

[Dougie Do'ins]

Girl I work with hasn’t shut up for the last month telling everyone she’s going to the Dominican Rupiblic for Christmas.

 

Came back from the post office with a thousand pounds worth of euros.

I'm sure I posted on here about four years ago about a girl I used to work with. She'd been to Las Vegas but had no idea she'd been to America. 

[tokyojoe]

I'm sure I posted on here about four years ago about a girl I used to work with. She'd been to Las Vegas but had no idea she'd been to America. 

She probably thought it was Blackpool.

[Fowlers God]

We have no kids tomorrow as they’re going out with her dad. Weather permitting I’ll be playing the unmentionable in the morning so just to pay lip service I asked her if she’d like to meet me in the pub afterwards.

 

Her: why would I come to the pub with you after football? You don’t want me there.

(In my head) yeah you’re fucking right. I never want you in the pub with me ever so stop fucking moaning at me for not inviting you out with me.

Me: I can never win can I?

[Furmedge]

Couple of knobheads in our place had Christmas jumpers on yesterday but not too many, one of the female managers though - dressed as Mrs Claus!!!

 

I don't know how I managed to get through the day without punching her stupid fucking head in!

 

Our work had the Christmas jumpers day yesterday.  I chose to work from home.

[Rico1304]

I lost my wallet a couple of weeks ago on a train. Just had an email from the National Trust as the woman who found it contacted them as my membership card was in there. Why the fuck didn’t she just sent the wallet to me after all my address is on my drivers license which was also in there.