The world of a woman.

[Mook]

1 hour ago, Special K said:

Just once I'd like my wife to understand the concept of money in our bank account being finite.

 

Wants something doing this week but we don't have the money for it yet

 

"Does that me I can't get it done then?"

 

Yes, yes it does

 

 

'What are we saving for?' is my favourite.

 

See if the boiler breaks or one of us loses our job or the roof caves in or one of the two cats you insisted on getting needs an operation. Or if we want to retire or ever pay off that fucking mortgage.

 

Those are some of the things we are saving for.

[Mook]

'Everybody else does it on their credit card' is another one I love.

 

Take a walk down the street, spend five minutes on Facebook, 'everybody' are complete and utter morons. Fuck doing what they're doing.

[General Dryness]

4 hours ago, Mook said:

'Everybody else does it on their credit card' is another one I love.

 

Take a walk down the street, spend five minutes on Facebook, 'everybody' are complete and utter morons. Fuck doing what they're doing.

George Carlin nailed it.

 

“Think of how stupid the average person is, and realize half of them are stupider than that.”

[Rico1304]

Who pours hot wax down a sink? My wife does.  Then puts the washing machine on a floods the kitchen.  The fucking brand new kitchen. 
 

She can sort it out, I’m having fuck all to do with it.  

[Rico1304]

Might ask Alec Baldwin for a gun. 

[YorkshireRed]

I was discussing the Bob Mortimer book with the Wife. I’m currently reading it, she hasn’t read it.

Stupidly I shared an anecdote from the book with her. She, despite having zero evidence to back it up, claimed what he said happened didn’t occur in the way he described as “nobody would be like that”.

 

I considered arguing with her but what’s the point. I’m not of her world. 

[sir roger]

She is never happier than when she is on the phone while I am never happier to avoid the phone.

[A Red]

9 minutes ago, sir roger said:

She is never happier than when she is on the phone while I am never happier to avoid the phone.

When the phone rings in our house whilst we're watching something on tele, despite my protestations, she always answers it just in case its an emergency. Instead of then taking the fucking thing elsewhere she will then sit there with the tele on mute talking shite whilst giving me daggers for having a face like thunder.

[lifetime fan]

54 minutes ago, Rico1304 said:

Who pours hot wax down a sink? My wife does.  Then puts the washing machine on a floods the kitchen.  The fucking brand new kitchen. 
 

She can sort it out, I’m having fuck all to do with it.  

Why is she using hot wax???

[Rico1304]

Just now, lifetime fan said:

Why is she using hot wax???

Fuck knows. And I’m not speaking to her to find out.  

[sir roger]

Just now, lifetime fan said:

Why is she using hot wax???

That's the problem with watching old Madonna films and forgetting your age.

[niallers]

1 hour ago, Rico1304 said:

Who pours hot wax down a sink? My wife does.  Then puts the washing machine on a floods the kitchen.  The fucking brand new kitchen. 
 

She can sort it out, I’m having fuck all to do with it.  

You say that now in the highest fit of anger but you know you'll have to do it, even if it's just for your own peace of mind!

[Rico1304]

3 minutes ago, niallers said:

You say that now in the highest fit of anger but you know you'll have to do it, even if it's just for your own peace of mind!

She’s had a plumber round.  I’m in bed eating a hotdog. 

[niallers]

Just now, Rico1304 said:

She’s had a plumber round.  I’m in bed eating a hotdog. 

Maybe the first time in history something like this has worked. Kudos

[Rico1304]

4 minutes ago, niallers said:

Maybe the first time in history something like this has worked. Kudos

She usually have me over to be fair.  Although she’s about to go and get me some beers so she knows she’s got a lot of making up to do.  

[lifetime fan]

12 minutes ago, Rico1304 said:

She usually have me over to be fair.  Although she’s about to go and get me some beers so she knows she’s got a lot of making up to do.  

Make sure she doesn’t fob you off with the 330ml bottles or even the new cans. 
 

You want the proper job. 

[Rico1304]

4 minutes ago, lifetime fan said:

Make sure she doesn’t fob you off with the 330ml bottles or even the new cans. 
 

You want the proper job. 

620ml or she’s walking back to the shops.  

[Bjornebye]

54 minutes ago, A Red said:

When the phone rings in our house whilst we're watching something on tele, despite my protestations, she always answers it just in case its an emergency. Instead of then taking the fucking thing elsewhere she will then sit there with the tele on mute talking shite whilst giving me daggers for having a face like thunder.

 

[deiseach]

On 19/10/2021 at 18:37, Special K said:

Just once I'd like my wife to understand the concept of money in our bank account being finite.

 

Wants something doing this week but we don't have the money for it yet

 

"Does that me I can't get it done then?"

 

Yes, yes it does

I think the concept has finally trickled into my wife's head. It's only taken 20 years. Her mother, on the other hand...her philosophy is that if there is enough money in the account at this very moment then she can afford it. All the direct debits you might have between now and pay day? They'll be fine. Maddening. 

[Mook]

It's reached that time of the year when the heating goes on and women can display their full talent for sharing the heat with people or animals within ten metres of the house by constantly leaving all the fucking doors wide open.

[Mudface]

11 minutes ago, Mook said:

It's reached that time of the year when the heating goes on and women can display their full talent for sharing the heat with people or animals within ten metres of the house by constantly leaving all the fucking doors wide open.

Came back late tonight, heating's been whacked up to 22°C, not a single internal door off the hall is shut, and there was one person in the house.

[littletedwest]

We have the heating on and a fan going at same time

[niallers]

this is all of us men when it comes to the heating

 

 

[Bob]

On 22/10/2021 at 17:33, Rico1304 said:

She’s had a plumber round.  I’m in bed eating a hotdog. 

Posting in the trans thread too, while you gobble on a wiener in bed?

[Rico1304]

40 minutes ago, Bob Spunkmouse said:

Posting in the trans thread too, while you gobble on a wiener in bed?

I mean it’s just top lols. Top lols.