Yet another dilemma.

[She Knows It]

My fucking amazing old trout of a mother has volunteered me to be a model for her friend's daughter, who has an interview for a hairdressers next week. The girl has only moved up here from Birmingham last week and knows nobody (hence her panic about finding a model and my Mum nominating muggins here). She phoned me, and to be honest she sounds about 6, and quite retarded (though that might just be the accent).

 

I've been trying really hard to grow my hair since loads of it fell out last year and I had to get it cut short. I'm worried this girl is going to butcher my head, and I'll end up having to have it dead short again. I'll do anything to help anyone ordinarily, but I'm not feeling very comfortable about this. However, if I pull out she won't get the job.

 

Should I sack her off? After all, I've never even met the girl. Or is Good Samaritanism the way forward?

[Section_31]

Nah fuck that, don't be taking any risks with your bonce, say you've got lice or something?

[Redexile]

My fucking amazing old trout of a mother has volunteered me to be a model for her friend's daughter, who has an interview for a hairdressers next week. The girl has only moved up here from Birmingham last week and knows nobody (hence her panic about finding a model and my Mum nominating muggins here). She phoned me, and to be honest she sounds about 6, and quite retarded (though that might just be the accent).

 

I've been trying really hard to grow my hair since loads of it fell out last year and I had to get it cut short. I'm worried this girl is going to butcher my head, and I'll end up having to have it dead short again. I'll do anything to help anyone ordinarily, but I'm not feeling very comfortable about this. However, if I pull out she won't get the job.

 

Should I sack her off? After all, I've never even met the girl. Or is Good Samaritanism the way forward?

tell her you'll do it but is she ok with the fact that you have an uncontrollable twitch which makes your head jerk violently and does she have insurance cover should her scissors pierce your ear drum/

[hamstrung]

Shave your head. Problem solved.

[She Knows It]

But then she'll be jobless and it'll all be my fault. It was the same with the fucking war in Iraq.

[Anubis]

Ring her and tell her your mother has reconsidered and would LOVE to model for her. Your mother isn't going to say 'no' when her friend thanks her.

[grazywalker]

Send Dirk instead

[Anubis]

Or Madstock. In fact, take them along but just don't tell them where they're going.

[ticklemeclemo]

Maybe you could find a homeless person and treat them to a nice bob cut or maybe even a perm, that way the 6 year old with the accent gets the job and you keep the flowing locks

[Section_31]

Can't you wear a wig and let her cut that?

[She Knows It]

I reckon I might just ring her and explain I'm a bit nervous about it, and tactfully ask for her credentials. Do you reckon that would be cheeky?

[Anubis]

Nope. After all, you're the one who has to live with her efforts, not her.

[Kopite]

I reckon I might just ring her and explain I'm a bit nervous about it, and tactfully ask for her credentials. Do you reckon that would be cheeky?

 

Your hair fell out?

 

What happened?

[Flying Pig]

SKI, she's ok. My Mum had her's done. looked great.

[gazelle]

No way dont do it, she might be shit. It's your hair SKI - its taking you that long to grow it, tell her sorry but no. IMO

[Remmie]

Ha ha you vain git. It's only a haircut. Sand. Vagina.

[Big Ig]

An argument for the defence - blokes can just do a Grade 1 if it goes tits, birds can't, unless they've caught lesbo-itis. SKI, if this goes tits, it's a lifetime of lumberjack shirts and fuzzy taches for you!

[She Knows It]

Cheers Gazelle, I'm thinking I might do that unless I find out she was a senior stylist at Toni & Guy, rather than a Saturday floor sweeper at "Upper Cutz" in Wolverhampton.

 

Remmie, it's far more than just a haircut. When you get to my age, you need longer hair to hide your wrinkles and jowls.

 

Ig, if I catch lesbo-itis, it'll be of the hot, minxy, pornotastic type not your Sandi Toksvig variety.

[Big Ig]

See, now why can't we have a global epidemic of that (albeit the strain that lets blokes join in, or there'd be procreation problems afoot) rather than bloody bird flu, ebola or pokemon?

[odris]

Do it i say.

[Nick Leeson]

I'm all for it. I let you cut my hair twice and you completely fucked it up both times so I'm owed this. I wanna see you with a lego man hair do.

[bigredruss]

it's only a hair do bet someone else would be gratefull of a freebie. i'm sure the salon would put it right if it was bad

[AVEEZ]

just playin catch up from last week - but I say tell her to fuck right off.. she's clearly not a stylist or the salon wouldnt be asking her to prove her worth..theyd be getting references!!!

 

No way on gods green earth would I allow the girl near my hair -vanity or not - it would never ever happen!!

[Malarkey]

But then she'll be jobless and it'll all be my fault. It was the same with the fucking war in Iraq.

 

It's not your fault. It's your Ma's for volunteering you.

[Unrighteous]

I would fucking tell her to go do one... my mother too for volunteering it.