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Premier League Round Up (Oct 27-29 2023)

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It’s not often I’m wrong and when I am I’ll do whatever it takes to dig in and find a way out of admitting it. So this doesn’t happen very often, but I’ll hold my hands up and say I was wrong about Eddie Nketiah.


Not specifically because he scored a hat-trick in their 5-0 rout of Sheffield United, I’ve been thinking it for a few weeks but didn’t want to say anything in the hope that it was just a purple patch and I was actually right about him. I’m not though, he’s proved me wrong.


I never thought he was shit, but I didn’t think he was good enough to play for a team at the level Arsenal are at and saw him more as a Bournemouth or Wolves level player. He’s much better than that. Don’t get me wrong, I’m not saying he’s great or anything but he’s way better than I gave him credit for.


Mark that one down in your diary as it will be a few years before I ever need to (or am willing to) eat humble pie like that again.


His first goal was lovely. Quality first touch and then a composed finish. He went to the fans and was pointing to his ear though. Not sure what that was about but maybe Arsenal fans felt the same way about him that I did? His second was a clinical finish after the keeper flapped at a corner. Again, he kind of just stood in front of the fans with a look that said “how do you like me now”.


Then he banged in a beauty for his hat-trick and although he was at least smiling at this one, he pointed at his chest and then at the turf as if to say “I belong here”. Then he celebrated with the subs, not the crowd. Saka gave him the match ball and only then did he acknowledge the fans. He obviously thinks Arsenal fans are knobheads, which makes me appreciate him even more. If he wasn’t playing for them I’d be anointing him “my boy” this week.


Arsenal were then awarded a penalty for a foul on Vieira. The ref missed it but VAR correctly identified it and told him to look at the screen. Norwood did that footballer thing of pointing at the ball and dismissing the grounded player as though he didn’t touch him. Except he was nowhere near playing the ball and his studs caught his opponent on the back of the heel. Footballers are such cheating fucks aren’t they? They all do it, the only thing that differs is the varying degrees. Is Norwood pointing to the ball that he didn’t play any less of an offence than a player diving? Both are trying to con the ref.


Nketiah let Vieira take the pen and he made it 4-0. Tomiyasu made it 5-0 from a corner. His first ever goal for them that, but Sheffield United are so bad that’s going to happen a lot. Joe Gomez will probably score against them.


There was an Emile Smith Rowe sighting. Where the fuck has he been? He looked good a couple of years ago but Arsenal seem to have outgrown him now. I know he’s been injured but even when he’s fit he doesn’t seem to get a look in and they’ve bought a few players in his position. He’s done a reverse Nketiah. He’ll be the one at Wolves or Bournemouth. Probably Leicester actually, they’re coming back up and have tried to sign him before.


Sheffield United are clearly shit, but they’re also ravaged by injuries and there’s just no way a team like that is going to be able to cope. Even at full strength they’re probably the worst team in the league (maybe Luton) but things are so desperate they’re currently having to start Rhian Brewster, who is fourth or fifth choice I think. His first start for a year this was. I didn’t even see him on the MOTD highlights. Not his fault, they barely left their own half. Dire.

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Billing has "Philip" on his shirt. Apparently at the start of the season he announced that he wanted to be known only as "Philip" from then on.  The match commentators have responded by relentlessly referring to him as "Billing" ever since.  

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10 hours ago, Waitak said:

Billing has "Philip" on his shirt. Apparently at the start of the season he announced that he wanted to be known only as "Philip" from then on.  The match commentators have responded by relentlessly referring to him as "Billing" ever since.  


Can't believe I called him Peter again!

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