What professions have you banged?

[Sugar Ape]

What kind of job has the dirtiest birds I wonder? Probably nurses in my experience. Pure filth. I've done a few dance teachers as well. They push the nurses close.

 

Going back to my most recent ones I can remember it would be :

 

Childminder, nurse, hotel manager, Insurance company worker, BP garage worker, nurse, Child support agency, Home & Bargain.

 

The Home & Bargain one, I woke up with her when I was living in Orrell Park and could vaguely remember pulling her in town the night before and her saying she couldn't come back because she was in work the next day. I promised her I'd drop her off in the morning, I asked her where she worked when I woke up and she said Home and Bargain in Birkenhead.

 

I proper couldn't be arsed dropping her off over there so I said I still felt pissed so I wasn't driving and she'd have to get the train. She had a face on her like thunder. I walked her the train station because she had no idea where she was and said ' see you later ' as she was walking into the station.

 

She turned round with the most vicious look I've ever seen and said ' go fuck yourself you horrible lying scruffy prick. ' I was fuming at the cheeky bastard. One thing I'm not is scruffy. I couldn't think of a reply straight away so I just walked to Walton Vale and got my brekkie from Sayers.

[DAgger]

[s(k)aturation]

Apparently the prostitution business is full of goers.

[Sugar Ape]

Apparently the prostitution business is full of goers.

 

I always get prostitutes and Australians mixed up, what's the difference again?

[Pony Princess]

Awesome thread. I really like it and you'll get some rep when I can do. I'm just going to stick with females as I don't want to go all woofter:

 

- Student psychologist: top stuff, glasses, proper secretary looking and would suck me off and let me spunk all over her face with glasses on. bareback for months, probably should get that checked out.

 

- Incapacity benefit case (one of those chronic pain diseases) - boss blow job, ginger, nice fanny with a little red landing strip, was a bit dirty shagging a bird on crutches. would totally smash that again.

 

- Welsh pub landlady, black belt in kickboxing. hard as fuck, welsh and nice shagging a bird who would kick the arse of people who annoyed me. glasses again and spunk on them again, i think that might be my fetish. cracking ride. i'd marry her if she wasn't a woman.

 

- single mother unemployed: dirty as fuck. met her at college and she sucked my dick for fixing her computer. was fucking awesome but the porch over the doorway wasn't very attractive. she was proper dirty in bed when we met up again numerous times but really needy and chickenlicken only has one major concern, and that is chickenlicken.

 

- girl doing the YTS scheme on that canal boat that goes round bootle - went out with her for a while, not dirty,loads of missionary, really boring, major problem with alcohol, wanked off on her arse once when she was asleep

[s(k)aturation]

I always get prostitutes and Australians mixed up, what's the difference again?

 

Negligible.

[s(k)aturation]

Speaking of prostitution, the ad game was once fertile ground for game birds I seem to remember.

[silverlining]

All in media or advertising. Needy, spoiled and hard work.

 

Apart from the wife who is something to do with IT

[Magic Sponge]

I had a one night stand with a dental nurse. When I was getting off in the morning, she gave me a mr smiley sticker.

 

All night when I was destroying her, she kept saying that she wasn't a slag and that we should go out on date's and all that jazz.

 

As I was walking down her path the next day, getting off, she's at the door and shouts, holding the ten digit number I gave her, "I can't wait for you to take me out, it'll be lovely", bit of a pause, "what's your name again mate?".

[llego]

french Doctors Without Borders chick in congo. easiest pull of my life.

[Tossed and blown]

Nurse, shitkicker, teacher, doctor, nurse, nurse, veterinary nurse, veterinary nurse, stable girl, receptionist, veterinary nurse, telephonist.

 

The sciences have always been a strong point.... good grouping, as they used to say in 'the darts'.

[chauncey]

The filthiest was a (then trainee) journalist who is that most prized of all females: skinny with big tits. She was a bad slag - a girl for whom "loves the Scouse cock" might have been coined - and there were a fair few of us who had a game but she was such a dirt. On the rare occasion I see her byline in the Echo I still get a twitch.

 

Most frigid: primary school teacher - roughly the same age as me but, man, was she inexperienced. More often than not a bevvy loosens them up but this bitch would just fall akip*! Probably the prettiest girl I've ever been with but laziness like that was just asking to be cheated on... Though they're a mixed bag, have always found uni students to be the easiest pulls. Student's a profession these days, isn't it?

 

 

*Before; not during, unfortunately.

[Remmie]

2 of the 3 dirtiest were unemployed, the other worked at a pub. What is it about not having a profession that free's women's minds to sticking their tongue up your arsehole (not even requested either)?

From other thread

[Rico1304]

Prior to my lovely wife I went out with a policewoman, nurse and then an air hostess. It was like being Robin Askwith.

 

The nurse was by far the dirtiest, she used to say "can we do it up the bum tonight?" all the time. To pay her way through Uni she became a lap dancer which kind of fucked her up. I'm still friends with her though, she's normal again now and a lovely girl.

 

The air hostess is a slag and hates me. She used to do long haul to Bahrain where lots of the girls had rich Arabs 'friends' who took them out and bought them gifts - but there was no sex. Of course there wasn't you slag.

 

I was with the copper for years. Never go out with a copper.

[Ezekiel 25:17]

Probably had all of the above at one point, remember this police woman one, it was funny she'd be out all weekend bashing people around the head with her truncheon but as soon as I started to doing it to her with mine, ohhh, thats a different story.

[lifetime fan]

Nurse, shitkicker, teacher, doctor, nurse, nurse, veterinary nurse, veterinary nurse, stable girl, receptionist, veterinary nurse, telephonist.

 

The sciences have always been a strong point.... good grouping, as they used to say in 'the darts'.

 

I've never met a bird who has or works with horses that doesn't go like the clappers.

 

Nurse

Care workers

Psychologist

Barmaid

Student

Waitress

Speech therapist

Translator

Unemployed single mother

 

Looking at that list I'd show it to any lad thinking of working in care, so many opportunities....

[Magic Sponge]

Probably had all of the above at one point, remember this police woman one, it was funny she'd be out all weekend bashing people around the head with her truncheon but as soon as I started to doing it to her with mine, ohhh, thats a different story.

 

'ello, ello, ello, ello.

 

Etc.

[VladimirIlyich]

Im not surprised nurses are dirty bitches,a mouth full of jizz will usually trump(pun intended) a face full of shite.

[lifetime fan]

Yep, was a student nurse that wanted me to rape her. Proper slag.

[RJ Fan club]

Students, Admin, Pharmacist, Town Planner, Nutritionist, Graphic Designer, Surveyor, Benefits Officer, Bar Maid, Ecologist, Accountant.

 

My other half is a Conservation Officer. So whilst it is somewhat Development Industry based, I think you can see I'm willing to go off piste.

[Sugar Ape]

Students, Admin, Pharmacist, Town Planner, Nutritionist, Graphic Designer, Surveyor, Benefits Officer, Bar Maid, Ecologist, Accountant.

 

My other half is a Conservation Officer. So whilst it is somewhat Development Industry based, I think you can see I'm willing to go off piste.

 

A Nutritionist sounds like hard work. What was she like?

 

Also, I thought you said a conservative officer for a minute there so almost negged you. Not sure what one of them would be, but just sounded Tory like.

[silverlining]

Where the fuck do you lot meet women? Stable girl?!

 

I think my extraordinarily narrow scope says a lot about me, none of it good.

[Chippy]

Care worker, single mother (plural), girl who worked in a Chinese takeaway, make-up artist, accountant, office worker, a good few unemployed over the years, a prison officer, children's nursery employee, tesco manager, beautician. God knows how many more in my 20's.

[silverlining]

I have so obviously not had enough sex with different women

 

I could say I was choosy, which I am, but that's a loser's excuse.

[Guest davelfc]

Yeah I'd say I'm choosy as well but the problem is, so are the women.