little things that annoy the shit out of you

[Harry's Lad]

3 minutes ago, Bjornebye said:

He twats the bike into a kerb doesn't he? 

He never sees the sudden curve til it's way too late....

[Bjornebye]

8 minutes ago, Harry's Lad said:

He never sees the sudden curve til it's way too late....

All this while some cunt somewhere must be tolling a bell 

[dockers_strike]

Fucking old girl is going to want the central heating on if the temperature drops any more! Put a fucking cardie on FFS!

[Bjornebye]

18 minutes ago, dockers_strike said:

Fucking old girl is going to want the central heating on if the temperature drops any more! Put a fucking cardie on FFS!

Hahaha it was cold this morning to be fair. Coldest the house has been when I got up in months. 

[Captain Willard]

26 minutes ago, dockers_strike said:

Fucking old girl is going to want the central heating on if the temperature drops any more! Put a fucking cardie on FFS!

Mrs williard/Kurtz is now of an age where her core body temperature is less stable than fucking Cherynobl in the hours before the meltdown. We veer between the thermostat at 30 or the patio doors wide open sometimes within minutes. It’s a thermal rollercoaster in our house these days. 

[Elite]

42 minutes ago, dockers_strike said:

Fucking old girl is going to want the central heating on if the temperature drops any more! Put a fucking cardie on FFS!

I'm looking forward to it being freezing. Love winter.

[Harry's Lad]

23 minutes ago, Elite said:

I'm looking forward to it being freezing. Love winter.

I prefer winter to summer, I hate being too hot. Having said that, I woke up for a piss about 4 this morning freezing. 

We always have the bedroom window open and that was a pretty strong cold breeze.

You don't expect that in the middle of August. 

[TheBitch]

Working for the gas/elec company for free. 
 

“Send us a meter reading”
 

“No come and fucking get it yourselves you cunts”

[Harry's Lad]

Just Eat/Uber Eats.

Why the fuck do they seem to take priority when you go to the Maccies or KFC etc and why are they all allowed to lounge around inside maskless, coughing and spluttering all over the gaff.

Mrs HL had arranged to meet up with some friends this morning and go for a coffee at McDonald's and didn't get served for 45 minutes because of them.

Why the fuck should lazy bastards get their order before people who actually get off their arses and go to these places.

Cunts.

[Tony Moanero]

25 minutes ago, Harry's Lad said:

Just Eat/Uber Eats.

Why the fuck do they seem to take priority when you go to the Maccies or KFC etc and why are they all allowed to lounge around inside maskless, coughing and spluttering all over the gaff.

Mrs HL had arranged to meet up with some friends this morning and go for a coffee at McDonald's and didn't get served for 45 minutes because of them.

Why the fuck should lazy bastards get their order before people who actually get off their arses and go to these places.

Cunts.

Coffee at McDonald’s? Your wife must be a glutton for punishment, mate.

[Harry's Lad]

18 minutes ago, Tony Moanero said:

Coffee at McDonald’s? Your wife must be a glutton for punishment, mate.

Skem mate, there's nowhere else. As my arl fella used to say, If the world had an arsehole, this is where it would be.

[Section_31]

When you've had a shit in the bog and someone says it stinks. Well yeah.

[Captain Turdseye]

2 hours ago, Harry's Lad said:

Just Eat/Uber Eats.

Why the fuck do they seem to take priority when you go to the Maccies or KFC etc and why are they all allowed to lounge around inside maskless, coughing and spluttering all over the gaff.

Mrs HL had arranged to meet up with some friends this morning and go for a coffee at McDonald's and didn't get served for 45 minutes because of them.

Why the fuck should lazy bastards get their order before people who actually get off their arses and go to these places.

Cunts.

I tried using Uber Eats last night for the first time. Ordered really early and asked for delivery between 6:00 and 6:30. 
 

They emailed at 5:45 and it just said “Your order has been cancelled.” No explanation or anything. Bastards. I phoned the restaurant and the fella said “We’re busy, we’ve only got one chef, all deliveries cancelled, sorry, bye.”

 

I’m a glutton for punishment as well as a glutton for Prezzo calzones so I’m gonna try again in a bit. Maybe they’ll be less busy today…

 

But yeah, I took Turdsette to the cinema last week and told her she could have KFC for dinner first. It’s basically next door. We had to wait ages behind three of these drivers to get served. 

[Babb'sBurstNad]

Calzone rep.

[stringvest]

just received a letter from merseyflow.  Cunts.

[Bjornebye]

3 minutes ago, stringvest said:

just received a letter from merseyflow.  Cunts.

Absolute racket. Cunts. get it sorted right away mate and make sure you speak with them or you'll have a demand from Marstons for 140 quid and they will claim you haven't tried to get in touch. 

[Captain Turdseye]

2 hours ago, Babb'sBurstNad said:

Calzone rep.

It was gooood. 
 

The party is over now. I’m gonna have to go and buy some vegetables. 

[Captain Turdseye]

Beans probably. 

[Elite]

Just now, Captain Turdseye said:

It was gooood. 
 

The party is over now. I’m gonna have to go and buy some vegetables. 

As long as you coat them in sugar and trans fats you'll enjoy them.

[Bjornebye]

Just now, Elite said:

As long as you coat them in sugar and trans fats you'll enjoy them.

Yeah just get carrot cake and loads of full fat cream then deep fry it. 

[Elite]

1 minute ago, Bjornebye said:

Yeah just get carrot cake and loads of full fat cream then deep fry it. 

I used to always roast veg and pour honey over the top of it. Still healthy right?

[Trumo]

3 hours ago, Section_31 said:

When you've had a shit in the bog and someone says it stinks. Well yeah.

 

Don't let them in while you're in there then.

 

Oh, wait...

[Babb'sBurstNad]

Just seen some bellend off Love Island is on the BBC's Hundred cricket coverage. These people are like TV herpes.

[Dr Nowt]

Mosquitos, and specifically that cunty, gloating ‘I’m coming for you’ noise they make, when you’re in bed, know full well there’s one in the room preparing to dive-bomb you, but can’t be arsed to get back up and hunt for it. Confident I’ll wake up tomorrow eaten alive by the fucking thing.

 

[manwiththestick]

I mentionef the MiL and her dog before, now don't get me wrong, I like dogs but we don't have one as I don't have the free time to spend walking them.

 

Anyway she turns up to see the wife and the dog is clearly damp from an earlier walk but she just let's it in the house which straight away upsets our two cats, I nip out to the shops to get out of the house, come back after about half an hour and the fucking dog is lying on the couch, my couch to be exact. Fucking fuming, house and couch smelling of wet dog. The missus is fine with this and can't see why I'm annoyed and grabbing the Febreeze out of the cupboard the second her mum and dog are out of the house.