What constitutes the perfect cooked breakfast?

[Karl_b]

5 hours ago, Captain Willard said:

I’m on a big weight loss drive mainly powered by expensive injections so this morning I turned down the all expenses cooked breakfast at the airport for this. 

 

Looks quite nice that 

 

Cooked though? 

 

Negged.

[lifetime fan]

5 hours ago, Captain Willard said:

I’m on a big weight loss drive mainly powered by expensive injections so this morning I turned down the all expenses cooked breakfast at the airport for this. 

I hope you were in a lounge and didn’t pay for that! 

[Bjornebye]

3 hours ago, Anubis said:

Fuge, do you ever get the feeling that these places know you're an Englishman?

 

I mean, seriously.....

 

They’ve scraped that off a junkies ceiling 

 

 

 

[lifetime fan]

Just now, Captain Willard said:

Expenses 

Thank God for that, bet that was over £13 as well wasn’t it? 

[Jairzinho]

2 hours ago, Bjornebye said:

They’ve scraped that off a junkies cock

 

 

 

 

[Spy Bee]

17 hours ago, Vincent Vega said:

Might’ve known that prick would be an anti-beaner. He’s typical of their sort. 
 

The nearest half of the plate was cooked by a close encounter with the sun, the furthest part of the plate was cooked by a close encounter with the moon!

[DJLJ]

17 hours ago, Vincent Vega said:

Might’ve known that prick would be an anti-beaner. He’s typical of their sort. 
 

I see Lifetime Fan was allowed to enjoy grilling one part of the plate.

[Pete]

23 hours ago, Captain Willard said:

I’m on a big weight loss drive mainly powered by expensive injections so this morning I turned down the all expenses cooked breakfast at the airport for this. 

Well then.  That doe not constitute a cooked breakfast at all. 

[lifetime fan]

1 hour ago, Captain Willard said:

The coffee is hot

Negged for drinking coffee instead of tea. 

[Pete]

1 hour ago, Captain Willard said:

The coffee is hot

Well that makes all the difference then!

[Stouffer]

[DalyanPete]

On 21/05/2024 at 13:24, Fugitive said:

This has to be one of the worst things that has ever happened to me. I’m fucking shaking with anger.

 

The have given me uncooked streaky fucking bacon, the sausage was cooked on an ice cube, the toast is literally only toasted on one side, the hash brown has been raped in transit and they added fucking beans.

 

 

How the fuck have they managed to make a full english look like a chippy meal?

[DalyanPete]

On 21/05/2024 at 15:04, Captain Willard said:

I’m on a big weight loss drive mainly powered by expensive injections so this morning I turned down the all expenses cooked breakfast at the airport for this. 

I admire your drive but i would have refused you boarding.

[Mudface]

29 minutes ago, Stouffer said:

 

I'm literally seething with anger at this. Fucking cunts.

[DalyanPete]

30 minutes ago, Stouffer said:

Sunburnt bacon

[Rushies tash]

32 minutes ago, Stouffer said:

 

Where's the rest of it? This, and you had to watch GB News? Fucking hell mate.

[YorkshireRed]

34 minutes ago, Stouffer said:

Even the teapot is trying to distance itself from that nonsense breakfast. 

[cloggypop]

1 hour ago, Stouffer said:

 

I see the Brexit food shortages are hitting hard. 

[Bob]

I'm backing Stouff here. If that plate had beans on it, that'd be a fine looking breakkie. An argument can be made for a.second sausage, or some.balck pudding, a hash brown even, and they'd be valid, but what is there is only really undone by the obvious focus on what is not there. 

 

Add beans, job done. Great start to the day.

[DJLJ]

1 minute ago, Bob said:

I'm backing Stouff here. If that plate had beans on it, that'd be a fine looking breakkie. An argument can be made for a.second sausage, or some.balck pudding, a hash brown even, and they'd be valid, but what is there is only really undone by the obvious focus on what is not there. 

 

Add beans, job done. Great start to the day.

A new low.

[Spy Bee]

2 hours ago, Stouffer said:

Bacon, egg and toast look great - I also think this is white pepper on the egg, which is the only pepper that should ever go anywhere near eggs.

 

Mushrooms look good.

 

Sausage looks lonely and like it's been dipped in lava.

 

Everything else looks missing!

[TheHowieLama]

It is very flat.

 

A flat English Breakfast.

[Curly]

On 21/05/2024 at 19:02, Special K said:

Thick cunt Lee Anderson trying to start a culture war over the worst fry up I've ever seen

 

 

https://twitter.com/LeeAndersonMP_/status/1792830107947848023?t=czqgQacMPcd90qDg2tc7Lg&s=19

I fucking hate that meff

[Bjornebye]

3 hours ago, Stouffer said:

This isn’t a breakfast, it’s a cry for help 

 

Stouff call 116 123 asap 

 

[Bjornebye]

Just now, Captain Willard said:

I was at Heathrow at 6 am today. Never fails to amuse me to see blokes with wives and kids in tow ordering pints to accompany their breakfast. Only at airports is this acceptable, they wouldn’t crack open a can at home to go with their cornflakes. 

Most would if they could get away with it. Also, some people aren’t keen fliers so a beer or two steadies the nerves. Plus he’s dragging the wife and kids so he probably needs a beer. Add to that he’s probably in holiday mode and is glad to finally be off work for a little while and able to enjoy this thing we lamely call life. Not only that but there are no real time zones past check in and that’s just a fact so shove your berries and fibre with coffee breakfasts up your cat flap, let men be men.