Have a rant thread

[Unrighteous]

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"Oh I had a great year,<insert shit about work, meeting people and random encounters or going on holiday>

 

Just fuck off, you are dying on the inside

 

[Champ]

I have just been in M&S and they have their Easter eggs out on display! Its the second of Jan ffs

[Bobby Hundreds]

Fucking adverts using shitty female acoustic cover versions of songs but slowed down and all shittyness. Stop it its crap, the newest one is dont stop by fleet wood Mac. Just give it a fucking rest.

[Trumo]

I have just been in M&S and they have their Easter eggs out on display! Its the second of Jan ffs

 

They are a bit weird are M&S. Several years ago, I bought a couple of sandwiches for work and they gave me a free cooler bag. When I asked them why, they said it's because I'd spent more than a fiver on 'Food To Go' or something. I asked them what use the cooler bag would be, and they said it would keep the food fresh for longer. They were more than a little bit confused when I pointed out the cooler bag was nowhere near big enough for the sandwiches to fit in, but I took it anyway. This is not just a cooler bag, this is a M&S cooler bag pretending to be a wallet.

[RedKnight]

Fucking adverts using shitty female acoustic cover versions of songs but slowed down and all shittyness. Stop it its crap, the newest one is dont stop by fleet wood Mac. Just give it a fucking rest.

 

I was thinking this when I saw it. They all do it these days.

[stringvest]

Fucking adverts using shitty female acoustic cover versions of songs but slowed down and all shittyness. Stop it its crap, the newest one is dont stop by fleet wood Mac. Just give it a fucking rest.

 

I hear you - but the real culprit is called plinkity plonkity nursery rhyme music with a shit slightly out of tune upright piano. Sometimes covers, sometimes originals. Always shite. It's been going on for fucking years, and it was started by fucking Coldplay. Everytime one comes on the TV - which is about every 10 minutes if you're watching ITV or Sky - I have a right old rant, and my kids know not to stop me. My son, who can actually play the piano properly, tried playing one of these shite tunes once and I kicked the stool from under him.

 

In fact, it's not limited to the piano. Some cunts are proponents of this shite on ukelele. My son's ukelele is no longer playable.

[Trumo]

...My son, who can actually play the piano properly, tried playing one of these shite tunes once and I kicked the stool from under him.

 

In fact, it's not limited to the piano. Some cunts are proponents of this shite on ukelele. My son's ukelele is no longer playable.

 

Are these part of the same excruciatingly painful (or pleasurable if your name is Lewis!) episode?

[A_S]

New Year's Day here had a Modern Family marathon on telly, so the wife and I just had a lazy day watching that, as I definitely rate it as a top show.

 

So to annoy the living fuck out of me, EVERY single ad break they were showing previews for the Carrie Fucking Diaries. Seriously? I fucking hate Sex and the City so much so now they feel the need to do the fucking prequel and bore the shit out of me with the same fucking ad during every show I want to watch.

 

Even worse when they show the same ad twice within the same break. Possibly one of my biggest pet hates.

 

Fuck TV ads (except M&M and Snickers ones, they are always ace)

[GUS]

Fucking adverts using shitty female acoustic cover versions of songs but slowed down and all shittyness. Stop it its crap, the newest one is dont stop by fleet wood Mac. Just give it a fucking rest.

 

This

[md1892]

Fucking "Glee", thought that shit was done for, but oh no a new series being advertised everth fucking hour.

 

Where is a High School gunman when you need one ?

[ZonkoVille77]

Fucking adverts using shitty female acoustic cover versions of songs but slowed down and all shittyness. Stop it its crap, the newest one is dont stop by fleet wood Mac. Just give it a fucking rest.

 

Oh man that's a fucking head wreck. How many adds out there now do it?

Like slowing it down will make you want to buy something more cos its more "delicate" or something. Pure shite.

[Trumo]

Every single TV series that comes over from the US is advertised as 'the hit US show'. What constitutes a hit? One person over there watched it? I mention this in light of Aussie_Scouser's above rant about repeat previews of TV shows. A while back, I was watching Masterchef Australia on Watch, and in every ad break they showed trailers for 'hit US shows' like Grimm or Perception. Did anybody watch those in the US, never mind over here?

[VladimirIlyich]

Car tax discs with the serrated edges that never come off the paper without ripping part of it. Its the 21st century ffs,there must be a better way.

[Rico1304]

Oh this fucking winds me up...

 

Tonight on ITV at 9 there is a program about Brits who've gone abroad and it hasn't all turned out rosy. Tough fucking shit, am I supposed to feel sorry for them because they don't get the chance to gloat about the lovely weather and spending the days by the pool? Well I don't, you took a chance and it didn't pay off, don't expect any sympathy or worse any fucking money off us.

 

My favourite saying at the moment is 'Idiot in "life isn't fair" shocker' it gets a lot of use.

[Rapey Hugh]

This issue has no doubt been raised before but what ever happened to the thick? You know, the idiots, the morons, the stupid fucking vacant individuals?

 

It would appear that they are all now "suffering" with some incredibly mild version of a real learning/ behavioural disability. This week I was ranting about this girl I know and how generally thick she is when suddenly I get told by some soft shite:

 

"actually I think she may be a little bit dyslecsic, and have, like, ADD or something?"

 

What the fuck? Don't cheapen real disabilities. You can have dyslexia and not be a fucking plank just like how having it might only contribute to an already naturally fucking dim cunts lack of intelligence. The dumb are just that, dumb. It may be sad and hard for people (especially parents) to take but just like there are the smart, the dumb walk the earth.

[Guest Slim(fast)Shady]

"can't do that, i'm dyslexcic" spouts the moron that has been expelled from countless schools and the schools he/she was at he/she never bothered turning up to! Erm.....don't think so!

[Pony Princess]

Do they still do those career aptitude tests in school? It is a shame that you can't label kids as thick these days, which some of them clearly are.

 

"So... you are completely minge-brained and we know you are as thick as shitty jam. Therefore, you should aim for a job cleaning spunk off the floors in a Soho porn shop."

 

Honesty is the best policy. Some kids are born thick and parents should help their kids embrace their inner mongyness, rather than look for labels like ADD, Arse-burgers etc.

[lifetime fan]

'Consultations'

 

It's not a fucking consultation at all, you've already made your mind up, you just want me to pick which way out of 3 you're going to fuck me over pay and benefits.

[Champ]

'Consultations'

 

It's not a fucking consultation at all' date=' you've already made your mind up, you just want me to pick which way out of 3 you're going to fuck me over pay and benefits.[/quote']

 

Work or DWP?

[lifetime fan]

Work or DWP?

 

 

Work.

 

Not had a penny from DWP yet.

[Champ]

 

Work.

 

Not had a penny from DWP yet.

 

Yeah, never make the mistake that they think any more of you than a bum on a seat...

 

that's why I'd be a useless manager

[Liverpool lad]

People with no social etiquette, one girl I know acknowledges all news with a prolonged 'shut up' or 'fuck off'

[King Gheedorah]

Oh this fucking winds me up...

 

Tonight on ITV at 9 there is a program about Brits who've gone abroad and it hasn't all turned out rosy. Tough fucking shit, am I supposed to feel sorry for them because they don't get the chance to gloat about the lovely weather and spending the days by the pool? Well I don't, you took a chance and it didn't pay off, don't expect any sympathy or worse any fucking money off us.

 

My favourite saying at the moment is 'Idiot in "life isn't fair" shocker' it gets a lot of use.

 

I saw that. The bit when the posh ladies went to the food bank was compelling TV. Surprised they didn't rev up the BMW.

[Pidge]

Cyclist cunts. Long, straight country roads, pitch black, vehicles going in both directions. Not the best time to travel side-by-side you darwin award-baiting retards.

 

...and the shitty little blinkers don't quite cut it compared to the lights of the other cars. Luckily I don't drive like a twat... unlike the guy behind me who nearly rammed me for slowing down.

 

Single file you stupid cunts.

[Juniper]

People that get on busy trains and make no fucking attempt to walk through to another carriage to see if there are any seats, which there usually are other than in the middle.

 

Fucks me off no end, especially when they look at you expecting you to give up yours as they cannot be arsed to have a look themselves.

 

Fuck off, have a look in another carriage then come back to me and I'll give it up.