Family Strife

[Kevin D]

7 hours ago, Paulie Dangerously said:

OK got a genuine gripe to put in here. As mentioned on the world of woman thread, MrsD's brother left his wife and moved up here a month and a half ago. He's got a job, a flat and is nearly 50. I'm going to preface this with the fact he was born with very mild brain damage, and although he wouldn't be first pick on the pub quiz team, he's a generally functioning member of society. 

 

The whole situation is starting to get on my tits now. He can't do anything. I've had to install his washing machine, put up a curtain rail and Mrs D and his mum have arranged everything for him. His stuff was all moved when he was in work and I lugged the rest of the bags with minimal assistance from him. He went from livng with mum, to living with dad, to living with cuntwife so don't think he's ever actually had to fend for himself. He's at ours for tea multiple times a week; he's a unit and is eating and drinking us out of house and home. Ive stopped having beers in because half of them end up in him. He keeps mentioning the takeaway he bought for us last month as a thank you for everything we've done . 

 

He's now got profiles on our netflix, disney and deezer accounts and hasn't offered a penny towards them (principle, not price the issue here) he watches on a 42" telly we've given him, instead of having it in our bedroom which was the plan, but is constantly moaning he can't get the sound on his bluray player to work through it. 

 

I've told MrsD that when we're back in work in September it needs to stop because I can't be having him round when I'm trying to work of an evening. He needs to start building a life for himself, I've sent him links to various social clubs  spurs related things (he's a Tottenham fan) and encouraged him to get to know his new work colleagues. Its only been a month since he's been up so I'm probably being really harsh but my whole summer holidays has been spent sorting his life out and I'm approaching the end of my tether. 

 

He's family though whaddayagonnado?

 

End rant. 

 

 

[Jairzinho]

7 hours ago, Paulie Dangerously said:

OK got a genuine gripe to put in here. As mentioned on the world of woman thread, MrsD's brother left his wife and moved up here a month and a half ago. He's got a job, a flat and is nearly 50. I'm going to preface this with the fact he was born with very mild brain damage, and although he wouldn't be first pick on the pub quiz team, he's a generally functioning member of society. 

 

The whole situation is starting to get on my tits now. He can't do anything. I've had to install his washing machine, put up a curtain rail and Mrs D and his mum have arranged everything for him. His stuff was all moved when he was in work and I lugged the rest of the bags with minimal assistance from him. He went from livng with mum, to living with dad, to living with cuntwife so don't think he's ever actually had to fend for himself. He's at ours for tea multiple times a week; he's a unit and is eating and drinking us out of house and home. Ive stopped having beers in because half of them end up in him. He keeps mentioning the takeaway he bought for us last month as a thank you for everything we've done . 

 

He's now got profiles on our netflix, disney and deezer accounts and hasn't offered a penny towards them (principle, not price the issue here) he watches on a 42" telly we've given him, instead of having it in our bedroom which was the plan, but is constantly moaning he can't get the sound on his bluray player to work through it. 

 

I've told MrsD that when we're back in work in September it needs to stop because I can't be having him round when I'm trying to work of an evening. He needs to start building a life for himself, I've sent him links to various social clubs  spurs related things (he's a Tottenham fan) and encouraged him to get to know his new work colleagues. Its only been a month since he's been up so I'm probably being really harsh but my whole summer holidays has been spent sorting his life out and I'm approaching the end of my tether. 

 

He's family though whaddayagonnado?

 

End rant. 

 

[Paulie Dangerously]

5 hours ago, Captain Turdseye said:

*Puts on Tony Moanero hat*
 

 

What takeaway did he buy you? And what did you have?

Chinese. I had Singapore vermicelli.

5 hours ago, General Dryness said:

Isn't your missus french? Is he french? Tell him to fuck off back to France.

They're both duel nationality, he doesn't currently have a passport. No doubt I'll fill that form in too. 

5 hours ago, Anubis said:

Take him on a field trip to ASDA. Show him the ready meal section and bid farewell with the words “run wild and free, my padawan.”

He bought a big daddy steak from Aldi about a week ago and hasn't eaten it yet because he's been at ours. 

51 minutes ago, Bjornebye said:

Tough one Paulie. Whats the missus saying about it? Is she agreeing with you are is she all in on carrying on helping him function? If she's siding with you then she needs to talk with him. Failing that, Vlads idea's pretty solid. 

 

Is he on dating sites and stuff? Get him on them pronto. 

She's all in on getting him set up, there just doesn't seem to be a point where we say, "Right, you need to do this now." He's had a bad time the last few years with his marriage and it was her idea that he moved to Liverpool as he'd at least have us who he knows. Get him on tinder, what an idea. 

38 minutes ago, Rico1304 said:

Just come on to him one night.  He’ll either shit himself and you’ll never see him again or you’ll get a fuck out of it. 

He can't handle me at my worst so he doesn't deserve me at my best. 

35 minutes ago, Kevin D said:

 

If anyone is looking for a Foster man I have a number. 

9 minutes ago, Jairzinho said:

I've said my piece. 

[Harry's Lad]

8 hours ago, Paulie Dangerously said:

OK got a genuine gripe to put in here. As mentioned on the world of woman thread, MrsD's brother left his wife and moved up here a month and a half ago. He's got a job, a flat and is nearly 50. I'm going to preface this with the fact he was born with very mild brain damage, and although he wouldn't be first pick on the pub quiz team, he's a generally functioning member of society. 

 

The whole situation is starting to get on my tits now. He can't do anything. I've had to install his washing machine, put up a curtain rail and Mrs D and his mum have arranged everything for him. His stuff was all moved when he was in work and I lugged the rest of the bags with minimal assistance from him. He went from livng with mum, to living with dad, to living with cuntwife so don't think he's ever actually had to fend for himself. He's at ours for tea multiple times a week; he's a unit and is eating and drinking us out of house and home. Ive stopped having beers in because half of them end up in him. He keeps mentioning the takeaway he bought for us last month as a thank you for everything we've done . 

 

He's now got profiles on our netflix, disney and deezer accounts and hasn't offered a penny towards them (principle, not price the issue here) he watches on a 42" telly we've given him, instead of having it in our bedroom which was the plan, but is constantly moaning he can't get the sound on his bluray player to work through it. 

 

I've told MrsD that when we're back in work in September it needs to stop because I can't be having him round when I'm trying to work of an evening. He needs to start building a life for himself, I've sent him links to various social clubs  spurs related things (he's a Tottenham fan) and encouraged him to get to know his new work colleagues. Its only been a month since he's been up so I'm probably being really harsh but my whole summer holidays has been spent sorting his life out and I'm approaching the end of my tether. 

 

He's family though whaddayagonnado?

 

End rant. 

 

Why do I have visions of Charles Hawtrey in Carry on Camping?

 

It's a tough position to be in and I don't envy you. Is your Mrs onside with you, him, or is she just waiting to see how things pan out?.

 

Personally, I'd make some excuse that you're going to be busy for the next few days, or take your Mrs away for the weekend if you can, that way he'll have to fend for himself during that time and then see what happens. It could be a start anyway.

 

Failing that, you could just do a Terry Scott from the same film.

 

Hope this helps.

 

 

[Moo]

8 hours ago, Paulie Dangerously said:

OK got a genuine gripe to put in here. As mentioned on the world of woman thread, MrsD's brother left his wife and moved up here a month and a half ago. He's got a job, a flat and is nearly 50. I'm going to preface this with the fact he was born with very mild brain damage, and although he wouldn't be first pick on the pub quiz team, he's a generally functioning member of society. 

 

The whole situation is starting to get on my tits now. He can't do anything. I've had to install his washing machine, put up a curtain rail and Mrs D and his mum have arranged everything for him. His stuff was all moved when he was in work and I lugged the rest of the bags with minimal assistance from him. He went from livng with mum, to living with dad, to living with cuntwife so don't think he's ever actually had to fend for himself. He's at ours for tea multiple times a week; he's a unit and is eating and drinking us out of house and home. Ive stopped having beers in because half of them end up in him. He keeps mentioning the takeaway he bought for us last month as a thank you for everything we've done . 

 

He's now got profiles on our netflix, disney and deezer accounts and hasn't offered a penny towards them (principle, not price the issue here) he watches on a 42" telly we've given him, instead of having it in our bedroom which was the plan, but is constantly moaning he can't get the sound on his bluray player to work through it. 

 

I've told MrsD that when we're back in work in September it needs to stop because I can't be having him round when I'm trying to work of an evening. He needs to start building a life for himself, I've sent him links to various social clubs  spurs related things (he's a Tottenham fan) and encouraged him to get to know his new work colleagues. Its only been a month since he's been up so I'm probably being really harsh but my whole summer holidays has been spent sorting his life out and I'm approaching the end of my tether. 

 

He's family though whaddayagonnado?

 

End rant. 

 

September sounds like a good compromise but you should start laying the groundwork with him now, so tell him too that once you're back working he can't be coming round all the time so he needs to learn to cook and get on some dating sites.  Oh and that he can carry on with Netflix etc but seeing as though he's working he can contribute, even if he just buys you a few bottles of beer a month (rather than actually handing over his £6 share).

[Bjornebye]

Change his netflix profile name to "Malingering Cunt" 

[Bruce Spanner]

3 minutes ago, Bjornebye said:

Change his netflix profile name to "Malingering Cunt" 

 

[Evelyn Tentions]

17 hours ago, Paulie Dangerously said:

OK got a genuine gripe to put in here. As mentioned on the world of woman thread, MrsD's brother left his wife and moved up here a month and a half ago. He's got a job, a flat and is nearly 50. I'm going to preface this with the fact he was born with very mild brain damage, and although he wouldn't be first pick on the pub quiz team, he's a generally functioning member of society. 

 

The whole situation is starting to get on my tits now. He can't do anything. I've had to install his washing machine, put up a curtain rail and Mrs D and his mum have arranged everything for him. His stuff was all moved when he was in work and I lugged the rest of the bags with minimal assistance from him. He went from livng with mum, to living with dad, to living with cuntwife so don't think he's ever actually had to fend for himself. He's at ours for tea multiple times a week; he's a unit and is eating and drinking us out of house and home. Ive stopped having beers in because half of them end up in him. He keeps mentioning the takeaway he bought for us last month as a thank you for everything we've done . 

 

He's now got profiles on our netflix, disney and deezer accounts and hasn't offered a penny towards them (principle, not price the issue here) he watches on a 42" telly we've given him, instead of having it in our bedroom which was the plan, but is constantly moaning he can't get the sound on his bluray player to work through it. 

 

I've told MrsD that when we're back in work in September it needs to stop because I can't be having him round when I'm trying to work of an evening. He needs to start building a life for himself, I've sent him links to various social clubs  spurs related things (he's a Tottenham fan) and encouraged him to get to know his new work colleagues. Its only been a month since he's been up so I'm probably being really harsh but my whole summer holidays has been spent sorting his life out and I'm approaching the end of my tether. 

 

He's family though whaddayagonnado?

 

End rant. 

 

Change all your passwords

 

[Section_31]

Took my mum to springwood cemetery the other week for father's Day as my nan and granddad have a shared plaque on a plot where their ashes are buried. 

 

Bizarrely, my mother's ex who passed away is next to them as my sister insisted his plaque was put there (it was her one involvement after his death other than buying supermarket flowers for the coffin, which I think she obviously - as usual - only did to cause upset, given as none of the wider family could stand him, including my nan and grandad. It's got to be renewed every five years, someone else paid last time but my sister isn't going to pay this time as, according to her, 'he's not really there anyway.' 

 

Anyway, my mum had obviously told her she was going that day, and my sister was supposed to be going separately with her fella to lay flowers at her dad's plaque.

 

Me and my mum arrived with a plant each for my grandad to discover:

 

(1) my sister hadn't brought flowers for her dad and...

 

(2) my nan and grandad's plaque was gone..

 

I told my uncle who'd paid for it and he contacted the cemetery people and they were baffled. It hadn't fallen off, it'd been removed. After a few weeks they replaced it free of charge.

 

I'm 100% certain it was my sister though. I think she'd been as planned that morning and decided to leave it as a surprise for us when we got there. 

 

I went back a week later to see if they'd replaced it, they hadn't at this point but one of our plants had been moved from my grandad's plot to my sister's dad's.

 

My mum asked out loud a few weeks later why someone would nick it and my sister replied 'maybe it's because it didn't have 'god bless on?'.

 

She is a one woman pain machine who excells at nothing other than causing distress. I've never met anyone like that, even people who commit heinous acts usually have s reason such as financial gain, she just does shit to be a cunt.

[Captain Willard]

Mrs williard has to go into to hospital for an abdominal scan. Hopefully nothing serious. Her own mother had just declined to babysit becuase she says “these things take ages”. In the same conversation she said it’s a shame Mrs williard is not free as she was planning to go shopping that day. I’m absolutely furious 

[Bjornebye]

9 minutes ago, Captain Willard said:

Mrs williard has to go into to hospital for an abdominal scan. Hopefully nothing serious. Her own mother had just declined to babysit becuase she says “these things take ages”. In the same conversation she said it’s a shame Mrs williard is not free as she was planning to go shopping that day. I’m absolutely furious 

Hope the mrs is ok. 

[Moo]

8 minutes ago, Captain Willard said:

Mrs williard has to go into to hospital for an abdominal scan. Hopefully nothing serious. Her own mother had just declined to babysit becuase she says “these things take ages”. In the same conversation she said it’s a shame Mrs williard is not free as she was planning to go shopping that day. I’m absolutely furious 

I just don't get this level of self centeredness.  

I dunno how old her mother is but there's a generation I think that really struggle to show they care and would rather put on a hard face.  Maybe she comes into this category.

I hope your missus is okay.

[Captain Willard]

4 minutes ago, Bjornebye said:

Hope the mrs is ok. 

Thanks. Hopefully it’s nothing. I’m more pissed about the mother in law 

[Captain Willard]

5 minutes ago, Moo said:

I just don't get this level of self centeredness.  

I dunno how old her mother is but there's a generation I think that really struggle to show they care and would rather put on a hard face.  Maybe she comes into this category.

I hope your missus is okay.

Thanks. I’m sure she’ll be fine. More pissed at the mother in law. 

[VladimirIlyich]

4 minutes ago, Captain Willard said:

Thanks. I’m sure she’ll be fine. More pissed at the mother in law. 

I think you're doubly pissed at your Mother in Law! And rightly so.

[Harry's Lad]

32 minutes ago, Captain Willard said:

Mrs williard has to go into to hospital for an abdominal scan. Hopefully nothing serious. Her own mother had just declined to babysit becuase she says “these things take ages”. In the same conversation she said it’s a shame Mrs williard is not free as she was planning to go shopping that day. I’m absolutely furious 

Best wishes to your wife Mate.

[Captain Turdseye]

He’s shit stirred in the Bitchfest thread, he posts leaflets for elections, he’s took ‘Captain’ in his username and now he’s trying to replace my mother in law with his mother in law as the worst on the forum. I’ll have nothing left at this rate. 
 

 

 

PS. Hope Mrs Wellard gets well soon. 

[YorkshireRed]

1 hour ago, Captain Willard said:

Mrs williard has to go into to hospital for an abdominal scan. Hopefully nothing serious. Her own mother had just declined to babysit becuase she says “these things take ages”. In the same conversation she said it’s a shame Mrs williard is not free as she was planning to go shopping that day. I’m absolutely furious 

Still a little confused as to whether Mrs Willard is the same person as Mrs Kurtz or not but, whoever she is, I hope she gets well soon.

 

Fuck the mother in law (not the having sex kind of fucking).

[Captain Willard]

1 hour ago, Harry's Lad said:

Best wishes to your wife Mate.

Thanks. I’m sure she’ll be fine. 

[Captain Willard]

1 hour ago, Captain Turdseye said:

He’s shit stirred in the Bitchfest thread, he posts leaflets for elections, he’s took ‘Captain’ in his username and now he’s trying to replace my mother in law with his mother in law as the worst on the forum. I’ll have nothing left at this rate. 
 

 

 

PS. Hope Mrs Wellard gets well soon. 

Ha ha. Thanks. I’m sure she will be fine. 

[Captain Willard]

46 minutes ago, YorkshireRed said:

Still a little confused as to whether Mrs Willard is the same person as Mrs Kurtz or not but, whoever she is, I hope she gets well soon.

 

Fuck the mother in law (not the having sex kind of fucking).

Thanks. I’m sure she will be fine. 

[littletedwest]

1 hour ago, Captain Turdseye said:

He’s shit stirred in the Bitchfest thread, he posts leaflets for elections, he’s took ‘Captain’ in his username and now he’s trying to replace my mother in law with his mother in law as the worst on the forum. I’ll have nothing left at this rate. 
 

 

 

PS. Hope Mrs Wellard gets well soon. 

 

[Captain Willard]

3 hours ago, Captain Turdseye said:

He’s shit stirred in the Bitchfest thread, he posts leaflets for elections, he’s took ‘Captain’ in his username and now he’s trying to replace my mother in law with his mother in law as the worst on the forum. I’ll have nothing left at this rate. 
 

 

 

PS. Hope Mrs Wellard gets well soon. 

At the risk of over sharing (far too fucking late for that), she has relented. Your mother in law can have her crown back. 

[Section_31]

Had a coffee with a mate the other day and mentioned in passing my mum had met her fella in prison where he was doing five years for knocking some bloke's eye out with a snooker cue (he later died of a brain haemorrhage they couldn't tie it to the iniury hence GBH). She started writing to him as part of some church bollocks while he was still in Wakefield nick. This was the bloke she chose to bring into our home when I was seven years old.

 

 

Look on my mate's face was priceless. I do occasionally take it for granted that not everyone else had such a 'quirky' childhood.

[Section_31]

Me mum hasn't been able to send texts to my uncle or cousin for a few weeks (the only other family members who are of any help to her, frequently give her food, lend her money etc), she suspected it was her phone network but I checked their numbers in her phone and they'd been changed, by my sister without doubt.

 

Just another day at the office.