Stupid Football Fashions

[WaltonRed]

Yeah when they have their kids names or somthing like that

[Trumo]

Subs that take 5-10 minutes to get ready to come on when summoned. Sometimes they even forget their shirts in the dressing room. I think Capello once told a player to get changed back because he'd wasted so much time. Ryan Babel is particularly guilty of this slackness. Get a chair massager if you have that much trouble waking your arse up!

 

Subs that delay their introduction by having tape applied to cover their wedding rings, earrings, nipple rings, nose rings, cock rings, bracelets or chains. You're a footballer, not P-Diddy!

[Trumo]

Yeah when they have their kids names or somthing like that

 

*cough* Tevez *cough*

 

On his shinpads.

[Pidge]

Tevez, that reminds me of one.

 

Any cunt player who carries a mask/dummy/dildo any prop around with them for use in a celebration. The only celebration with a prop that was any good was Gazza at Euro 96

[Original202]

It's been around quite a while now but I hate players and managers bringing their kids on the pitch for cup final celebrations and end of season laps of honour.

 

Started around 2000, Dennis Wise took his kid up with him when lifting the FA Cup and the Mancs were all at it when they won the league.

 

Load of shite.

[Bellflower]

I hit corners for my team and if the ball is an inch outside the arc and to the left a bit, it makes it easier to swing it in to your liking when your hitting an in-swinger with your right foot.

You seem to know what you're doing, could you take our corners ?...........

[torahboy]

Twatoos. Particularly down the arms ones that 'tell the story' of their fucking done fuck all but play football lives.

[Johnni]

First names of the player on the back of their shirts.

The placing of the ball on the corner thing does make a difference but not on the penatly spot.

Socks rolled up to cover the knees - Terry, Henry.

[El Rojo]

Massive, ridiculously expensive headphones around the neck during post match interviews.

 

And they're probably listening to some awful watered down R&B sludge when they're not speaking to the microphone in cliches.

[nickjt]

Big blop of vicks vapour on the shirt. Arsenal around 05 I think!

 

Deffo hate kids on pitch for laps of honour as mentioned above.

 

The ever increasing use of higher squad numbers, noticed today that bentnder was 52!

[RedKnight]

What is the deal with those lilac boots? Villa has them on tonight.

[Kevin D]

Stupid fucking psyching-yourself-up type of stupid posing chest-puffing bollocks just before taking a freekick. Ronaldo started it, now I see Gerrard doing it. Quite irrritating.

 

C.Ronaldo's free-kick routine is incredible in how self-involved it is. Made worse whenever he's on ITV and Tysledly cannot contain himself in anticipation as the arrogant cunt pouts and toes it straight into the wall.

[Trumo]

What is the deal with those lilac boots? Villa has them on tonight.

 

Some new Nike boot. You can buy the real thing for only £285. That's right. TWO HUNDRED AND EIGHTY FIVE POUNDS STERLING! Nike clearly go for Hicks' patented overpriced commodity approach.

[Trumo]

That white tape that players pretty much cover their entire sock with. Yes your shinpad isn't going anywhere, but if you get shithouse-tackled like Eduardo, it's a bit of a mission to get your socks off.

[Ian Sea]

Not sure if this is a fashion but I fucking hate how players feel the need to appeal for absolutely everything these days. They're not playing cricket and should play to the whistle.

[George Costanza]

The obvious one is making a meal out of every single challenge/foul. The pathetic yelps that seem to follow a hefty challenge annoy the fuck out of me, you've been kicked not shot you twat. Get up and get on with the game.

 

Great shout with tatoos and also footballers obsessed with their fucking hairdo's. Sorry Dave but alice bands are a modern footballing twatism.

[Franny DelMucho]

Can't stand this new breed of footballer who think they are super heroes e.g. Ronaldo, Nani. You know the type i mean, the way they stand with there arms out and clenched fists, the way they run, hold they're chest out etc. Sure there are loads more of these twats and when i find out who they are i will enjoy hating them aswell. Think this is why i love footballers like Xavi and Iniesta - no posing just a game that consists of pure skill and doesn't require all that fucking super hero shite thrown in to the mixer.

[Malarkey]

Short sleeves with gloves. This phenomenon is aptly named the "Cain Connolly" combo.

[Faustus]

Soccer AM actions or phrases invading popular culture.

 

I actually don't mind Soccer AM, to be honest. You know what you're going to get and it's decent hangover telly when you're zonked out on the couch, but I hate the people who view at as like a lifestyle guide in how to act and talk when they're at the football.

[straight_red]

Not sure if this is a fashion but I fucking hate how players feel the need to appeal for absolutely everything these days. They're not playing cricket and should play to the whistle.

 

Spot on with that one. Nothing worse than seeing someone conceed an obvious throw in on the halfway line and then throw a paddy because it's been given against them. Does appealing for everything really get you more decisions?

 

I know refs are poor at times, but they're not stupid.

[The Dude Abides]

Players who change the name they have on their jersey to their first name, or shorten it. 'Lass' springs to mind though i'm sure there's more.

 

William Gallas wearing the no. 10 shirt at Arsenal. You're a CB you stupid cunt.

 

Players that make a big song and fucking dance in the papers about how they aren't going to celebrate if they score because they have too much respect for their old club.

[AngryOfTuebrook]

I hit corners for my team and if the ball is an inch outside the arc and to the left a bit, it makes it easier to swing it in to your liking when your hitting an in-swinger with your right foot.

Weirdest thing about is that no linesman ever pulls anyone up on it. Why not?

[rubble-rouser]

First names of the player on the back of their shirts.

.

 

The arsenal PA announcer only reading out the first names of the players fucks me off. With Henry, maybe, but with Gael fucking Clichy!

[Original202]

Weirdest thing about is that no linesman ever pulls anyone up on it. Why not?

 

Because the rules state that the ball merely has to touch the line.

[AngryOfTuebrook]

The arsenal PA announcer only reading out the first names of the players fucks me off. With Henry, maybe, but with Gael fucking Clichy!

 

I'd love to hear that:

 

PA - "GAEL"

Crowd - "FUCKING CLICHY!"