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Showing content with the highest reputation on 11/02/19 in all areas

  1. 4 points
    thank fuck he hadn't seen you run a server upgrade, he'd have thought dog's dinners were a speciality!
  2. 4 points
    Love sharks. Went to the sea life centre in Blackpool a few weeks ago and they had a little baby oceanic black tip in one of the tanks. They had to take it out of the main shark tank and stick it in with the regular fish, as the sharks would have eaten it. It was about 18 inches long, just swimming around this tank like a little badass, intimidating all the fish. I could have watched it all day, but my parking ticket only half an hour left so I had to leave. Someone needs to put a stop to those Japanese cunts killing millions of them every year for shark fin soup just because they think it makes their needle dicks stay a little bit harder for a little bit longer. I read recently that shark fin soup doesn't even taste of anything and they have to put chicken or pork in to give it flavour. They just chop the fins off and throw them back in the sea, still alive. Fucking pricks.
  3. 4 points
    I still think, were you to scrape away the bile, anger, ifithadnabinfer, conspiracy theories, blue Christmas trees and sheers bitterness, it'd be like taking apart an infinite number of Russian dolls, and at the very centre there's a little Evertonian (holding his child and aiming a punch) with an atom of dignity left. Or at least as close an approximation as to pass for it. It's for that reason I don't think they'll ever go back for Moyes. They've blamed being shite on a variety of things, and those stories are now of greater substance than anything else about them. Moyes represents their best years post 2000, and a whole generation of young fans have solidified the narrative that he would've been challenging if he had the funds. Now they've got the Moshiri millions (trillions?), and they should be moving forwards; to take him back would both dispel that myth and reveal how truly desperate they are. On the day that they run out of such excuses and twisted histories, they'll turn to dust like staked vampires and dissipate into the wind, and we'll wonder if they ever existed to begin with.
  4. 4 points
    What do evertonians do at the roulette wheel? They don't like red, and they don't like black, so...
  5. 3 points
  6. 3 points
    "Place your bets please" "All on blue" "I'm afraid there isn't a blue option, sir" "All on blue, mate" "Sir..." "Born not manufactured" "Excuse me, sir?" "All on blue, mate." "Right you are" "Red, number 19" "Get yer coat Sarah"
  7. 3 points
  8. 3 points
    Imagine the fume if he put it all on red.
  9. 3 points
  10. 3 points
    Couple of Mr Ted releases for you guys, Muscle Milk is our latest - was released on Friday!
  11. 3 points
  12. 2 points
  13. 2 points
    Posting shit trainers on internet forums should be an illegal activity too.
  14. 2 points
    Aguero, what a striker. Bit thick for not having picked up a word of English after all these years, though.
  15. 2 points
    Text from god daughter last night in USA(she's out there working for Apple) GD - Hi, off to Yosemite National Park tomorrow(part of the conversation) Me Bird - Our Shans off to Yozzermite national park tomorrow Me - What do you mean, Yozzermite? MB - Yozzermite National Park Me - Fucks that *she spells it* Me - Yo-sem-it-e, national park, as in Yosemite Sam, from the cartoons? MB - They named a park after a cartoon character? Me - * loss of will to live* Me - No, they named it after an 80's unemployed character from a BBC drama series MB - What? Me - Yozzer MB - Yozzer who? Me - You know, the one they named the national park after? MB - Which National Park? Me - Yozzermite National Park MB - thats the one I said our Shans gone too Me - *sigh* Me - The Voice is on soon Me - *Googles best acid to melt down a cadaver*
  16. 2 points
    The poached eggs are like how I’d imagine Danger Mouse’s bollocks to be. Impressive stuff!
  17. 2 points
    I wouldn't fancy trainies made out of Swede though. I'd look a right turnip in them..
  18. 2 points
    The chip pushing into the egg yolk reminds me of first sexual experience. "Is it in?" "No." Good times.
  19. 2 points
    They Shall Not Grow Old 10/10 If you have any interest in the first world war get this watched. Still available on I Player https://www.bbc.co.uk/iplayer/episode/b0brzkzx/they-shall-not-grow-old
  20. 1 point
    The parallels with that and what’s going on over here are very pointed
  21. 1 point
    There's rumours that I am going after Scarlet Johansson in the summer. Whether she'll let me near her remains to be seen
  22. 1 point
    Some cunt has got reddit going again. Shocking. (https://www.reddit.com/r/redditsoccer)
  23. 1 point
    Bog rolls that snap off one sheet at a fucking time in work.
  24. 1 point
    Sounds like an Oasis album title. ‘Dirty kecks, clean sheets man, Our kid’s just shat in the back of the van, Don’t worry Digsy it’ll all be fine, Driving along in the sunshiiiiiine.’
  25. 1 point