The world of a woman.

[Creator Supreme]

10 minutes ago, Arniepie said:

got a cracker.

Been messaging this girl for the last weeks. Gets on really well and arranges for her to come to ours on friday.

Takes Thursday off to spruce the house up, picks her up on Friday and when she gets her she says she cant stay her cos the house is a bit dusty(she has asthma). Offers to pay for a hotel instead,books it and then nips to the shop whilst she gets ready.

Gets a phone call from her in tears saying come back,race back thinking someone has broken in and she is crying saying she just wants to go home.

Fuming, take her back to the station and sit with her in the boozer waiting for a train. The ice breaks a bit and she says how embarrassed she is..we start to laugh about it and say we keep in touch.

Message incessantly for the last few days,arrange to meet on sat and she says she thinks she is falling for me.

Gets a text this morning saying she doesnt wanna talk and can we leave it for a bit.   

 

fucking basket case.

Change your locks, change your phone number, move, emigrate even.

 

Otherwise in a few weeks you'll come home to a dark house and you'll just hear "You're my wife now Dave"!

[littletedwest]

17 minutes ago, Arniepie said:

got a cracker.

Been messaging this girl for the last weeks. Gets on really well and arranges for her to come to ours on friday.

Takes Thursday off to spruce the house up, picks her up on Friday and when she gets her she says she cant stay her cos the house is a bit dusty(she has asthma). Offers to pay for a hotel instead,books it and then nips to the shop whilst she gets ready.

Gets a phone call from her in tears saying come back,race back thinking someone has broken in and she is crying saying she just wants to go home.

Fuming, take her back to the station and sit with her in the boozer waiting for a train. The ice breaks a bit and she says how embarrassed she is..we start to laugh about it and say we keep in touch.

Message incessantly for the last few days,arrange to meet on sat and she says she thinks she is falling for me.

Gets a text this morning saying she doesnt wanna talk and can we leave it for a bit.   

 

fucking basket case.

Sounds the opposite of what happened to my mate. He meets this bird, when pissed.

Agrees go on a date.sees her and she's fatter than be remembered.

Gets pissed with her and thinks fuck it.when she takes her clothes off he realises he can't.

 

She then locks him in her house and won't let him leave. For some reason rather than just kicking off he ran upstairs wrapped himself in all her towels and threaten jump out an upstairs window.

She let him out then 

[Arniepie]

Just now, littletedwest said:

Sounds the opposite of what happened to my mate. He meets this bird, when pissed.

Agrees go on a date.sees her and she's fatter than be remembered.

Gets pissed with her and thinks fuck it.when she takes her clothes off he realises he can't.

 

She then locks him in her house and won't let him leave. For some reason rather than just kicking off he ran upstairs wrapped himself in all her towels and threaten jump out an upstairs window.

She let him out then 

Outstanding!!

[manwiththestick]

25 minutes ago, Arniepie said:

got a cracker.

Been messaging this girl for the last weeks. Gets on really well and arranges for her to come to ours on friday.

Takes Thursday off to spruce the house up, picks her up on Friday and when she gets her she says she cant stay her cos the house is a bit dusty(she has asthma). Offers to pay for a hotel instead,books it and then nips to the shop whilst she gets ready.

Gets a phone call from her in tears saying come back,race back thinking someone has broken in and she is crying saying she just wants to go home.

Fuming, take her back to the station and sit with her in the boozer waiting for a train. The ice breaks a bit and she says how embarrassed she is..we start to laugh about it and say we keep in touch.

Message incessantly for the last few days,arrange to meet on sat and she says she thinks she is falling for me.

Gets a text this morning saying she doesnt wanna talk and can we leave it for a bit.   

 

fucking basket case.

She sounds that potentially she could turn a bit stabby, chalk it down as a massive drama swerved.

[sir roger]

Do you have any rabbits, Arnie ?

[Mook]

My mate went home on the bus the other night & it was only about 11pm so I went down my local for a few brandies, I was standing at the bar minding my own business and this bird turns round from her pals & starts chatting to me. We were getting on like a house on fire for about 20 minutes, even taking the piss out each other, I was finished my drink & spotted she was finished hers so casually said, "Can I get you a drink?".

 

Honestly, you'd think I'd asked for her thoughts on statutory rape. She couldn't get away quick enough. 

 

I rarely speak to girls when I'm out but it'll be even less frequent now. Bunch of fucking mental cases.

[Curly]

56 minutes ago, sir roger said:

Do you have any rabbits, Arnie ?

He used to

[Fowlers God]

On 26/01/2024 at 20:33, Strontium said:

She was trying to close tabs on Chrome on her iPad, and couldn't understand why it wasn't working. She was opening new ones instead. 77 open tabs she had.

 

On 26/01/2024 at 20:59, Mudface said:

 

My Mum did something similar on her phone and wondered why it was so slow. She is 78 though.

 

Is your Mum fucking SD?

[Mudface]

38 minutes ago, Fowlers God said:

 

 

Is your Mum fucking SD?

 

Hope not, she can do much better. 

[Strontium]

I can't really comeback there, it's probably true.

[YorkshireRed]

On 15/02/2024 at 17:50, Arniepie said:

got a cracker.

Been messaging this girl for the last weeks. Gets on really well and arranges for her to come to ours on friday.

Takes Thursday off to spruce the house up, picks her up on Friday and when she gets her she says she cant stay her cos the house is a bit dusty(she has asthma). Offers to pay for a hotel instead,books it and then nips to the shop whilst she gets ready.

Gets a phone call from her in tears saying come back,race back thinking someone has broken in and she is crying saying she just wants to go home.

Fuming, take her back to the station and sit with her in the boozer waiting for a train. The ice breaks a bit and she says how embarrassed she is..we start to laugh about it and say we keep in touch.

Message incessantly for the last few days,arrange to meet on sat and she says she thinks she is falling for me.

Gets a text this morning saying she doesnt wanna talk and can we leave it for a bit.   

 

fucking basket case.

RIP Arniepie. 

[Section_31]

On 15/02/2024 at 23:09, Mook said:

My mate went home on the bus the other night & it was only about 11pm so I went down my local for a few brandies, I was standing at the bar minding my own business and this bird turns round from her pals & starts chatting to me. We were getting on like a house on fire for about 20 minutes, even taking the piss out each other, I was finished my drink & spotted she was finished hers so casually said, "Can I get you a drink?".

 

Honestly, you'd think I'd asked for her thoughts on statutory rape. She couldn't get away quick enough. 

 

I rarely speak to girls when I'm out but it'll be even less frequent now. Bunch of fucking mental cases.

 

Possible because she was with her mates.

 

Women seem to live and die by what other women think (one of the things young lads misunderstand is that they think women get dressed up on nights our to impress men, they don't, they do it for other women). 

 

I've been fucked off after meeting a woman's mates, as has a mate of mine, he was seeing a girl happily for six months and was dropped literally the day after meeting her friends for the first time.

 

There's a reason most marketing and advertising is aimed at women. Men are simple cunts, all they want to do is shag women. So advertising can only get to us through women  (buy this car  get this job, make this money and you'll get a shag). 

 

That's why they could never make a version Take me Out where the roles are reverse. Women turn their lights off because the bloke has got brown shoes or owns a gerbil, men would never turn their lights off for an attractive woman, even if she was a serial killer.

 

I pity single lads now, massive non stop headfuck. 

[Mook]

2 minutes ago, Section_31 said:

 

Possible because she was with her mates.

 

Women seem to live and die by what other women think (one of the things young lads misunderstand is that they think women get dressed up on nights our to impress men, they don't, they do it for other women). 

 

I've been fucked off after meeting a woman's mates, as has a mate of mine, he was seeing a girl happily for six months and was dropped literally the day after meeting her friends for the first time.

 

There's a reason most marketing and advertising is aimed at women. Men are simple cunts, all they want to do is shag women. So advertising can only get to us through women  (buy this car  get this job, make this money and you'll get a shag). 

 

That's why they could never make a version Take me Out where the roles are reverse. Women turn their lights off because the bloke has got brown shoes or owns a gerbil, men would never turn their lights off for an attractive woman, even if she was a serial killer.

 

I pity single lads now, massive non stop headfuck. 

 

I think the whole #meetoo thing has fucked it, every bloke is a rapist now. 

 

I can't be done with Tinder and all that so am pretty certain at age 45 that I'll never have sex again.

 

Let joy be unconfined.

[Section_31]

4 minutes ago, Mook said:

 

I think the whole #meetoo thing has fucked it, every bloke is a rapist now. 

 

I can't be done with Tinder and all that so am pretty certain at age 45 that I'll never have sex again.

 

Let joy be unconfined.

 

Should try speed dating, that's how I met the woman I was seeing before my Mrs. It was boss, even if you don't meet someone it humanises people, I actually found it interesting just meeting new women and hearing what had brought them to that point, strangely, it boosts your confidence too as talking to people you don't know starts to feel less weird. I'd deffo try it, just go into it with no expectations and treat it like a night out, me and my mate would do it then just go for a pint after to debrief.

 

Bars/clubs have always been a total waste of time. A woman's shields are at maximum and nobody is their real self. 

[Mook]

1 minute ago, Section_31 said:

 

Should try speed dating, that's how I met the woman I was seeing before my Mrs. It was boss, even if you don't meet someone it humanises people, I actually found it interesting just meeting new women and hearing what had brought them to that point, strangely, it boosts your confidence too as talking to people you don't know feels less weird. I'd deffo try it, just go into it with no expectations and treat it like a night out, me and my mate would do it then just go for a pint after to debrief.

 

I didn't even know that was still a thing.

 

To be honest, I'm fairly happy as I am. A woman would only wteck my equilibrium. I'll never have to hear, 'Are you just going to sit about on the couch all day?' or "Can you turn that weird music off?' ever again.

[littletedwest]

Stay single pal. 

We're both ill. I've gone to asda get some shopping ( despite feeling shit) come back made her breakfast. Bought her a cake.

 

" why have you bought shit butter?" No fucking gratitude 

[Mudface]

4 hours ago, Mook said:

 

I think the whole #meetoo thing has fucked it, every bloke is a rapist now. 

 

I can't be done with Tinder and all that so am pretty certain at age 45 that I'll never have sex again.

 

Let joy be unconfined.

 

I know, we're not unique any more.

[Section_31]

Me when my Mrs buys a new item of clothing: "Looks nice that."

 

Mrs when I buy a new item of clothing: "Do you really need it?"

[Bob]

9 hours ago, littletedwest said:

Stay single pal. 

We're both ill. I've gone to asda get some shopping ( despite feeling shit) come back made her breakfast. Bought her a cake.

 

" why have you bought shit butter?" No fucking gratitude 

But... why would you buy shit butter mate?

[VladimirIlyich]

Yep. You clean the place top to bottom,tidy up and think you've done everything well but a woman is like a beagle who sniffs out the merest flaw like dust spot missed or an empty toilet roll or kitchen roll holder. 'Eliminate the positive,accentuate the negative' is their motto.

[littletedwest]

26 minutes ago, Bob said:

But... why would you buy shit butter mate?

It was normal butter. We had been buying the cholesterol lowering butter but they had none on offer and fuck paying 4.50 for a small tub. Last time this happened she said " not paying that get normal stuff"" of course when i do it, get moaned at

[Paulie Dangerously]

Trying to explain to MrsD that yes, the mould that has appeared in our bedroom is related to her buying a humidifier for essential oils but no, running a dehumidifier at the same time is not a cost-effective solution to the situation. 

[Mudface]

2 hours ago, Paulie Dangerously said:

Trying to explain to MrsD that yes, the mould that has appeared in our bedroom is related to her buying a humidifier for essential oils but no, running a dehumidifier at the same time is not a cost-effective solution to the situation. 

 

Recreate the process by spraying her hair with water while she's trying to dry it.

[Special K]

My wife hasn't spoken to me all evening after I shouted at her while we were in the car. She said I freaked her out and she's having a massive anxiety attack.

 

 

 

 

 

I shouted at her to stop the car as she didn't see the pedestrian she was about to run over as we were coming out of the shop car park.

 

 

[Lee909]

https://www.instagram.com/reel/C2cXvQPMwMs/?utm_source=ig_web_copy_link

 

 

Fuvking lunatic