The world of a woman.

[Bobby Hundreds]

We bought a chest freezer but didn't have much space in the utility room, my missus suggested that and the dryer could go on top of one another. I said "how the fuck would you open the freezer" she said "well obviously I wouldn't put the dryer on top of the freezer" I said "think about it, unless youre getting a fucking ladder everytime you want to get something out of the freezer and squeezing it between the gap left between the lid and the ceiling how the fuck is that workable".... "oh yeah".

[Harry Squatter]

Wanted to get my Mrs some gin the other week so asked her mate for advice on which one she drinks when she goes out. 

 

Basically a 10 second call ended up as 5 minutes of her blathering on about different flavours and then sending me pictures of them then going on about getting Vodka from Costco.  In the end I just went the offy and bought one of the first ones I saw. 

[Harry Squatter]

A woman in work was going on about some property developer in Liverpool getting arrested who had a slightly similar surname to mine. She then said "is he related to you?". 

[Rico1304]

3 minutes ago, Doctor Troy said:

A woman in work was going on about some property developer in Liverpool getting arrested who had a slightly similar surname to mine. She then said "is he related to you?". 

Was he a Dr as well? 

[Harry Squatter]

14 minutes ago, Rico1304 said:

Was he a Dr as well? 

Yes, Dr Oetker, he makes pizzas too.

[Section_31]

When the Mrs is hoovering she often stops briefly to ask me something but then starts again just as I'm about to answer.

 

 

[Bjornebye]

5 minutes ago, Section_31 said:

When the Mrs is hoovering she often stops briefly to ask me something but then starts again just as I'm about to answer.

 

 

Hahahahaha. 

 

We caught a few minutes of who wants to be a millionaire last night and one of the questions was who wrote the score to Star Wars. I knew the answer so said John Williams but Hans Zimmer came up as one of the options. Would she fuck have it that I was right and it wasn't Hans Zimmer. Even when Clarkson said she muttered something about it not being him so I said google it. Anyway 5 minutes later I walk out the bathroom after brushing my teeth and she's stood there "Did you google it?" "Fuck off" 

[tokyojoe]

You watch ' who wants to be a millionaire '? FFS

[Bjornebye]

3 minutes ago, tokyojoe said:

You watch ' who wants to be a millionaire '? FFS

Fuck you brother 

[tokyojoe]

5 minutes ago, Bjornebye said:

Fuck you brother 

Ooo, touchy.

[Bjornebye]

Just now, tokyojoe said:

Ooo, touchy.

Hahaha I typed out an excuse as to why it was on my telly for about minutes but just decided fuck it 

[tokyojoe]

2 minutes ago, Bjornebye said:

Hahaha I typed out an excuse as to why it was on my telly for about minutes but just decided fuck it 

Thought you'd mistaken me for Stronts for a second.

[Bjornebye]

4 minutes ago, tokyojoe said:

Thought you'd mistaken me for Stronts for a second.

Hahaha 

[Paulie Dangerously]

Is there no nadir to the shit they will watch on the telly? Temptation Island, cunt wives of cunt County, the circle, below deck. It never ends.

[littletedwest]

Why can't they go in a shop and just buy what you came in for?

Went asda on Saturday, we had a list that should have come to 15 quid. We left after spending 50 quid. "What's matter you look pissed off?"

[mattyq]

18 minutes ago, Paulie Dangerously said:

Is there no nadir to the shit they will watch on the telly? Temptation Island, cunt wives of cunt County, the circle, below deck. It never ends.

Mine's obsessed with Made in Chelsea. Watched 5 minutes of it with her the other day

Could feel myself simultaneously losing the will to live and developing strong inclinations about smashing the telly to fuck 

[Mudface]

18 minutes ago, mattyq said:

Mine's obsessed with Made in Chelsea. Watched 5 minutes of it with her the other day

Could feel myself simultaneously losing the will to live and developing strong inclinations about smashing the telly to fuck 

I just refuse point blank to watch any of this shit with my missus, life's too short to waste it on the Kardashians or Alaskan Bush People or whatever utter pish she's found.

[Geoff Woade]

[manwiththestick]

1 hour ago, Paulie Dangerously said:

Is there no nadir to the shit they will watch on the telly? Temptation Island, cunt wives of cunt County, the circle, below deck. It never ends.

My wife doesn't work on a Monday but Tuesday to Friday she's out of the house at work whilst I'm working from home every day. Usually when I have my hour lunch break I have it in the living room, just chilling on the couch, browsing on here and such. I don't do it on Mondays anymore as she has Loose Woman on the TV and the first time it happened I had to leave the room as the inane drivel was spoiling my lunch hour, she claimed I was being dramatic, dramatic would have been ripping the telly of the wall as I have honestly never been subjected to such utter shite.

[TheBitch]

My hatred of Loose Women knows no bounds.

[tokyojoe]

It is amazing the utter tripe they watch. Her Indoors watches this (American, where else) shite about people having boils and the like burst. Think it's called Dr. Pimple Popper. I call it the Pus Programme.

 

 

[Pete]

1 hour ago, manwiththestick said:

My wife doesn't work on a Monday but Tuesday to Friday she's out of the house at work whilst I'm working from home every day. Usually when I have my hour lunch break I have it in the living room, just chilling on the couch, browsing on here and such. I don't do it on Mondays anymore as she has Loose Woman on the TV and the first time it happened I had to leave the room as the inane drivel was spoiling my lunch hour, she claimed I was being dramatic, dramatic would have been ripping the telly of the wall as I have honestly never been subjected to such utter shite.

And yet if there was a show like Loose Women on air that had a male panel slating women it'd be off air quicker than anything. 

[niallers]

 

[Section_31]

I'm not saying anything. I'm just leaving this here.

 

 

[YorkshireRed]

1 minute ago, Section_31 said:

I'm not saying anything. I'm just leaving this here.

 

 

She can captain my ship anytime.