What constitutes the perfect cooked breakfast?

[Vector Sigma]

On 14/07/2020 at 14:55, lifetime fan said:

Can’t remember if it was premier inn or another hotel chain linked with a pub...

 

But they had an all you can eat breakfast with Yorkshire puddings! 

Toby Carvery breakfasts have the Yorkshire pudding option. I'll ride the bike up to Formby and report back my findings!

[Trumo]

9 hours ago, VERBAL DIARRHEA said:

Polystyrene and cellophane, might bung you up Col.

 

Maybe we have to cut him a little slack as there's an explanation for everything. He was clearly shocked when he let go of a hangover fart that sounded like the opening track from a Pan Pipe Moods CD, only to realise he'd Mooked that wine bottle.

[Curly]

We have been away for the weekend - socially distanced in an isolated cottage in Shropshire with the dog and the baby. Googled a place for brekkie and found an outdoor cafe set up, so went down and got this for £8. Proper decent scran. I ordered the smaller breakfast, so that’s on me, but I’ve been up with the baby since 6am and tried to avoid breakfast so I didn’t ruin this, but ended up eating half a sleeve of pringles and a choux bun. The epitome of health.

 

Anyway, here it is. I’d give it a 8.5 out of 10. I should have gone for large as I was still hungry, but you live and learn. Do your worst you cunts...

 

 

[Bruce Spanner]

4 minutes ago, belarus said:

We have been away for the weekend - socially distanced in an isolated cottage in Shropshire with the dog and the baby. Googled a place for brekkie and found an outdoor cafe set up, so went down and got this for £8. Proper decent scran. I ordered the smaller breakfast, so that’s on me, but I’ve been up with the baby since 6am and tried to avoid breakfast so I didn’t ruin this, but ended up eating half a sleeve of pringles and a choux bun. The epitome of health.

 

Anyway, here it is. I’d give it a 8.5 out of 10. I should have gone for large as I was still hungry, but you live and learn. Do your worst tou

 

 

I’d be doing a twelve stretch for aggregated manslaughter if I was served that up.

 

Looks like one of those ‘authentic British breakfasts’ you get in upmarket Mogadishu hotels.

[YorkshireRed]

Have you deliberately arranged the tomato’s, sausages, egg and beans to resemble the face of someone happy that beans form a solid basis for all that they are?

 

If so, kudos. 

[Tony Moanero]

16 minutes ago, belarus said:

We have been away for the weekend - socially distanced in an isolated cottage in Shropshire with the dog and the baby. Googled a place for brekkie and found an outdoor cafe set up, so went down and got this for £8. Proper decent scran. I ordered the smaller breakfast, so that’s on me, but I’ve been up with the baby since 6am and tried to avoid breakfast so I didn’t ruin this, but ended up eating half a sleeve of pringles and a choux bun. The epitome of health.

 

Anyway, here it is. I’d give it a 8.5 out of 10. I should have gone for large as I was still hungry, but you live and learn. Do your worst you cunts...

 

 

They charge £8 and don’t include black pudding? Is that a mushroom? If so, had you eaten part of it before you took the picture?

[YorkshireRed]

My thirteen year old has just enjoyed a Big Breakfast at Morrison’s. 
 

In hindsight I should have taken the picture earlier. 

[TheHowieLama]

38 minutes ago, belarus said:

We have been away for the weekend - socially distanced in an isolated cottage in Shropshire with the dog and the baby. Googled a place for brekkie and found an outdoor cafe set up, so went down and got this for £8. Proper decent scran. I ordered the smaller breakfast, so that’s on me, but I’ve been up with the baby since 6am and tried to avoid breakfast so I didn’t ruin this, but ended up eating half a sleeve of pringles and a choux bun. The epitome of health.

 

Anyway, here it is. I’d give it a 8.5 out of 10. I should have gone for large as I was still hungry, but you live and learn. Do your worst you cunts...

 

 

The egg has been Pearced.

 

Nice how they decided to allow the beans (my there are alot) touch EVERYTHING!!

 

Saville of breakfasts - you should do time as an accomplice.

[Curly]

1 hour ago, Bruce Spanner said:

I’d be doing a twelve stretch for aggregated manslaughter if I was served that up.

 

Looks like one of those ‘authentic British breakfasts’ you get in upmarket Mogadishu hotels.

It tasted fucking amazing - all locally sourced meat and that. I’ve moved stuff before remembering to take a picture for this thread.

1 hour ago, YorkshireRed said:

Have you deliberately arranged the tomato’s, sausages, egg and beans to resemble the face of someone happy that beans form a solid basis for all that they are?

 

If so, kudos. 

I didn’t deliberately, but I defo see what you mean.

1 hour ago, Tony Moanero said:

They charge £8 and don’t include black pudding? Is that a mushroom? If so, had you eaten part of it before you took the picture?

No black pud lost them half a point. As did the hint of cinnamon in the beans, and also because they sold me a small portion, which is asked for, but I’m not shouldering the total responsibility for my own mistake.

42 minutes ago, TheHowieLama said:

The egg has been Pearced.

 

Nice how they decided to allow the beans (my there are alot) touch EVERYTHING!!

 

Saville of breakfasts - you should do time as an accomplice.

Haha - I dipped my toast in the egg and chopped the end of the sausage and then thought to take the picture. I’m not even sorry

[Pidge]

Just impressed by the person to your left taking on a fried egg (and I assume bacon) butty in a public setting. 

[Bjornebye]

I'd stab anyone within a half mile radius if I even saw someone eating that belarus. You fucking paedophile 

[Tony Moanero]

33 minutes ago, belarus said:

It tasted fucking amazing - all locally sourced meat and that. I’ve moved stuff before remembering to take a picture for this thread.

I didn’t deliberately, but I defo see what you mean.

No black pud lost them half a point. As did the hint of cinnamon in the beans, and also because they sold me a small portion, which is asked for, but I’m not shouldering the total responsibility for my own mistake.

Haha - I dipped my toast in the egg and chopped the end of the sausage and then thought to take the picture. I’m not even sorry

How much do they charge for a large breaskfast?

[Guest]

On 19/07/2020 at 14:47, Pidge said:

Gotta love a nice, evenly-cooked, banger.

Feel free to point one out when you see one.

 

2 hours ago, belarus said:

We have been away for the weekend - socially distanced in an isolated cottage in Shropshire with the dog and the baby. Googled a place for brekkie and found an outdoor cafe set up, so went down and got this for £8. Proper decent scran. I ordered the smaller breakfast, so that’s on me, but I’ve been up with the baby since 6am and tried to avoid breakfast so I didn’t ruin this, but ended up eating half a sleeve of pringles and a choux bun. The epitome of health.

 

Anyway, here it is. I’d give it a 8.5 out of 10. I should have gone for large as I was still hungry, but you live and learn. Do your worst you cunts...

 

 

It looks like an AT-AT has used maximum firepower on that.

[YorkshireRed]

4 minutes ago, Pidge said:

Just impressed by the person to your left taking on a fried egg (and I assume bacon) butty in a public setting. 

I’d hoped that was a side dish @belarus had ordered to supplement his breakfast. 
 

“One breakfast and a bacon and egg sandwich on the side my good man/woman”.

[Bjornebye]

1 hour ago, YorkshireRed said:

I’d hoped that was a side dish @belarus had ordered to supplement his breakfast. 
 

“One breakfast and a bacon and egg sandwich on the side my good man/woman”.

Can we stop calling it this please. 

 

Thanks. 

[Curly]

2 hours ago, Pidge said:

Just impressed by the person to your left taking on a fried egg (and I assume bacon) butty in a public setting. 

It’s the mrs that. She ate it with her knife and fork. She eats everything that way. She tackled a Cajun chicken burger with a knife and fork only yesterday, the bad perv.

2 hours ago, Bjornebye said:

I'd stab anyone within a half mile radius if I even saw someone eating that belarus. You fucking paedophile 

Hahaha - honestly, it was delicious. Best brekkie I have had for absolutely ages. First one I’ve had out since lockdown obviously, but still.

2 hours ago, Tony Moanero said:

How much do they charge for a large breaskfast?

£10 it was for the large. It was an extra sausage, extra piece of bacon, extra egg, extra round of toast and a whole mushroom I’d imagine.

 

I did regret it once I’d finished as I would easily have managed it. Also, the large was called the farmer’s breakfast and the small one was called the farmer’s wife’s breakfast, which also made me feel like a huge cunt to order.

[Tony Moanero]

1 minute ago, belarus said:

It’s the mrs that. She ate it with her knife and fork. She eats everything that way. She tackled a Cajun chicken burger with a knife and fork only yesterday, the bad perv.

Hahaha - honestly, it was delicious. Best brekkie I have had for absolutely ages. First one I’ve had out since lockdown obviously, but still.

£10 it was for the large. It was an extra sausage, extra piece of bacon, extra egg, extra round of toast and a whole mushroom I’d imagine.

 

I did regret it once I’d finished as I would easily have managed it. Also, the large was called the farmer’s breakfast and the small one was called the farmer’s wife’s breakfast, which also made me feel like a huge cunt to order.

Repped. There’s nothing quite like being made to feel like a cunt.

 

Outrageous that the large breakfast doesn’t include black pudding. A fry-up isn’t the same without it.

[mgw100]

26 minutes ago, Tony Moanero said:

Repped. There’s nothing quite like being made to feel like a cunt.

 

Outrageous that the large breakfast doesn’t include black pudding. A fry-up isn’t the same without it.

I declined a cafe breakfast this very morning due to it's absence. Plus they were charging 1.50 extra for toast

[Tony Moanero]

Just now, mgw100 said:

I declined a cafe breakfast this very morning due to it's absence. Plus they were charging 1.50 extra for toast

Repped. Did you kick off and create a scene?

[mgw100]

Nah, just a sad shake of the head. I'm understated like that.

[Bjornebye]

3 minutes ago, Tony Moanero said:

Repped. Did you kick off and create a scene?

It will have been like the scene from Universal Soldier where Van Damme batter Hank the chef but this time over no black pudding and expensive toast as opposed to not having any money to pay for about 8 fry-ups. 

[Anubis]

One for aRdja, this.

 

 

[Bruce Spanner]

7 minutes ago, Anubis said:

One for aRdja, this.

 

 

Don’t know about the breakfast, first time I’ve heard of them doing them, but their Sunday roasts are exceptional. 
 

 

[PestiRed]

Right, get your negs ready.

 

A little pre-amble. A french breakfast/brunch place has opened over the road from me and we’ve been going at the weekend for the last few weeks. It’s posh and a little over-priced. They do an amazing eggs benedict, American pancake and salty waffini. You can’t get an English breakfast in Hungary - the ingredients simply don’t exist- however it was on the menu so I though I’d try it out, mainly to post here

 

 

 

It cost £12 which is roughly 2-3 times I would normally pay for a breakfast here. As well as the plate of food, it cam with a freshly squeezed orange juice, a choice of tea or coffee (including cappuccinos, lattes etc) and a basket of sliced baguette (good bread made in-house but clearly not toast).
 

The eggs and bacon were perfect. The sausage was obviously not British (closer to a Stuttgart) and far too small but I was half-expecting to be given a frankfurter so not a complete disaster. The black pudding was actually a German blutwurst - nice but not black pudding. I don’t know what the tiny hash brown type thing was about. Mushrooms and tomatoes were cooked well. No idea what the green stuff was there for, it wasn’t mentioned on the menu.

 

If I’d been served this in England I would be upset and rate it about 4/10. In Hungary it rates as a great attempt and gets 8/10

 

just as a side-note, beans were offered but I declined because I’m not a scruffy bastard

[Jairzinho]

Weren't you put off by the child's fingers?