The Phantom Menace

[RedKnight]

There's plenty wrong with the Phantom Menace but I can't be arsed going into it now.

[Tom R]

NEWSFLASH - All Star Wars is fucking shite.

[Thants]

Shit script, no magic, rubbish villain. A film about a Council in space.

woah didnt know it was an old thread. I'm still right! *high fives mirror*

[Big Ig]

Whedon? :lol:

 

Thought you rated Firefly etc.?

[philyhamann]

Whedon and Star Wars equal a good Star Wars film does not.

[Harry Squatter]

Why have those viceroys got chinese accents? Wasnt GL accused of being racist making Jar Jar Binks talk in Patois?

 

The only good thing about that film is my mate getting up on a table in a packed Chinese restaurant in Tenerife and putting a load of Crispy Duck pancakes on his face and making two eyes in them then shouting "I will not condone a course of action that will lead us to war" to the whole place. I have never seen so many people be speechless or shake their heads.

[snez1]

Awful, awful film. Boring, fuck all happens. None of the characters are interesting. It has Jar Jar Binks and Asian aliens and the kid who plays Anakin is the worst child actor in history.

 

Fucking dreadful film, and i hate saying that.

[Mel Wood]

If you asked me if I'd ever watch a 70-minute long critical review of The Phantom Menace, a film I didn't like at the pictures and haven't watched since, I'd probably stare at you all confused or something.

 

But I found myself watching all of this one part after the other and thinking 'this is better put together and more entertaining than the original film'.

 

As long as you can get past his 'character' voice, he has some goshdarned good points, I feel.

 

Watch This: 70-Minute Video Review of Star Wars: The Phantom Menace | /Film

 

Apologies if it's been up here before. Couldn't see it on a search.

[Guest TK-421]

I will watch it later cheers for posting.

[dirty_sanchez]

Darth Maul was still awesome, but his street cred must have taken a beating from getting fucked up by Renton from Trainspotting.

[Mel Wood]

If you asked me if I'd ever watch a 70-minute long critical review of The Phantom Menace, a film I didn't like at the pictures and haven't watched since, I'd probably stare at you all confused or something.

 

But I found myself watching all of this one part after the other and thinking 'this is better put together and more entertaining than the original film'.

 

As long as you can get past his 'character' voice, he has some goshdarned good points, I feel.

 

Watch This: 70-Minute Video Review of Star Wars: The Phantom Menace | /Film

 

Apologies if it's been up here before. Couldn't see it on a search.

 

And here's the same fella's meticulous trashing of 'Attack Of The Clones', if anyone like his first one.

 

[YOUTUBE]CfBhi6qqFLA[/YOUTUBE]

[Manny]

Yeah Darth Maul is quality, and as you say completely underused.

 

Jar Jar Binks fucks me up.

 

Jar Jar Binks makes the Ewoks looking like... fucking Shaft!

[hedgehog brown]

soon as i saw this was bumped i was hoping i would be for the new red letter media "review."

 

although it wasn't as good as the first one, it was yet again more entertaining than the movie it was critiquing.

 

nice one, mel bird.

[RedKnight]

Just watching Attack of the Clones now, whoever was the casting agent for this movie needed firing. Nearly every actor onscreen struggles to deliver their lines with any conviction or authority with the exception of McDiarmid, McGregor and Jackson, and then they struggle under the clueless direction of that no neck cunt. The peripheral actors are especially poor, fucking useless Aussie twats.

 

Plus the special effects already look shite, you lose, Lucas!

[Funkasy]

Help me Obi Wan Kenobi!

[Section_31]

Just watching Attack of the Clones now, whoever was the casting agent for this movie needed firing. Nearly every actor onscreen struggles to deliver their lines with any conviction or authority with the exception of McDiarmid, McGregor and Jackson, and then they struggle under the clueless direction of that no neck cunt. The peripheral actors are especially poor, fucking useless Aussie twats.

 

Plus the special effects already look shite, you lose, Lucas!

 

I thought Attack of the Clones was the best of a very bad bunch when I saw it at the pictures, it's still only a step above Space Precinct though. The guy who did the now infamous review hatchet job of Phantom Menace has now done one of Clones on the net and it's really good, it's amazing just how bad a job Lucas has done on it, even things like Amidala falling in the sand and saying to the clone trooper "we need to get to the hangar bay", when, at the time, she and the audience had absolutely no idea where Dooku was going.

 

Awful stuff, missing even the very basics of stoytelling, the a - leads to b - leads to c which even the likes of Holby City has managed. I don't know if he's just a dunce, or he's just got so much money that he can't be arsed. Maybe it went shit for the same reason Star Trek went shit, because not unlike a certain sport, its bosses realised that fandom was to an extent non-predicated on quality, and they could make money no matter what.

 

Watchin the background production stuff of Lucas is embarassing too, he's just reeling off all these fucking stupid ideas and people in the background are going 'yeah, yeah sounds good'. I wonder if I'd have been able to do the same? Even if I'd been on top dollar. I don't actually think I could, I love Star Wars too much. I'd have said "George, you need to get a serious grip of life."

 

Lest we forget Lucas originally had Indiana Jones as a womanising tomb robber, and C3P0 as having the accent and manner of a Brooklyn used car salesman. Thankfully, cooler heads prevailed.

[JangoSolo]

Redlettermedia is a genius in doing these reviews - its what we've all been thinking and I love Star Wars. The plot holes are absolutely enormous!

 

Looking forward to his review of Revenge - which in my opinion is the tightest and best of the three (which doesn't say too much) - can't wait to see his view on Padme dying of a broken heart!!

 

Section - you are spot on about the Yes men - he really lost it during these movies, the sh1te he was coming out with and the nodding of the guys around him - truely shocking! Just look at their eyes - they don't like it, but didn't have the balls to stand up to it.

 

 

What's wrong with your faaaaace?

[Ted]

The light saber fight at the end of AOTC is fucking brilliant. Brilliant in the sense that it looks like Anakin Skywalker and the scientist out of Gremilins 2 are having a glowstick off in a gay bar.

 

Then Yoda turns up and it gets even funnier.

[Ted]

Those review videoes are fucking superb. They absolutely tear them both apart without even really trying. Not that they'd need to try as the plot holes are even more gaping than Jordan after she shat out Harvey.

[dennis tooth]

When they were doing the promo for it in KFC with lifesized figures me and my mates planned to get a bargain bucket before embarking on a night out down the paradox and ended up planning a raid on it. Anyway we spent a few days casing the place and getting our disguises ready, after getting our bargain bucket came back a few moments later and burst in dressed as the characters with me mate as the Darth Maul chap. Only kids like.

Our plan was to rob the dummies, easy, under the arm, you hold the door, away, jobs a good un so that we could do all kinds of great shit in the paradox queue and beyond but first we had to get them, all our plans went to shit when we tried to pluck the Darth Maul but they had chained the Darth Maul to the wall with one of them stupid shiny chain links and all his clothes fell off while me mate was ragging it off the wall the manager was coming out the back, we could hear him already beginning to shout 'oi' so we had to cut our losses, the chain would just not come off the wall, me mate managed to get a light saber but it turned out to be cheap tacky shit as was his hood which my other mate ripped off to the dismay of the kids in there, absolute carnage, we swore we'd be back but when we let things die down and returned it was 'my little pony' or some other shit, I did get a lifesize cardboard thing of that goat transvestite creature I wanted a Darth Maul under my arm but if I've learned anything from that now I can look back it is dont try anything. We went to all that expense to get to the greater prize and found that our kit was better quality and that was just 'for show'. I seriously though about complaining. Kids ey.

Edited April 30, 2010 by dennis tooth

[RedKnight]

Way to go, George. Way to go.

 

UPDATE: Lucas Added Vader Crying “Noooooo!” To RETURN OF THE JEDI | Badass Digest

[Section_31]

What an absolute bellend. Needless to say I won't be buying it, well done fucko.

[Sut]

I read about that this morning. He really can't stop messing with them can he?

 

The "Limited Edition" DVDs of the original theatrical version that were released a few years ago are the best.

[Special K]

Just made me decide not to buy the Blu Rays.

 

Fucking hell.

[Juniper]

I have no words....

 

(Apart from those)