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Oh can't you see You've breached FFP How my belly aches Laughing at your stupid takes

Looks like someone we know.

Well that was about as entertaining an experience as it's possible to have on a cold Thursday night at Anfield in the Europa League. To say it was "big coat weather", would be an understatement and both Dan and I (the only Team TLW lads doing the Europa matches this season) duly obliged. Because it was fucking Baltic, regardless of the warm glow of pleasure emanating from a very comfortable 4-0 win that left us as group winners before the season moves up a gear as we head into a very busy December. As expected, Klopp made a selection that looked easily good enough to win the match, while simultaneously resting some of the big guns. The presence of Virgil, Macca, Dom, Joel, Trent and Darwin on the bench spoke volumes, as did the fact that the first four of those names remained there all night. Klopp has quietly become arguably the best manager around for making use of his full squad, keeping everyone happy without letting standards or development dip (recent strange and humiliating defeat in France notwithstanding). It shouldn't be forgotten that we've already had quite a few significant injuries and suspensions this season, yet Jurgen has managed to negotiate pretty much every hurdle before us, regardless. Further tests await on that score - not least Alisson's absence for the next couple of weeks, minimum - but we must acknowledge that the days of a first eleven are pretty much gone now and we seem all the better for it as a club, despite still rapidly developing a new way of playing with many new personnel. Despite the many changes, virtually from the instant the match kicked off, we were playing some really nice stuff: all fluid movement and crisp, intelligent passing. Obviously both the quality of opposition and the fact that we were at home have to be factored into assessments of the significance of the performance, but I can't be anything other than pleased to see a heavily rotated team play some really entertaining stuff. We seem to have almost instantly switched from being a turgid and predictable mess filled with players whose standards had fallen off a cliff just a matter of months ago to a side now brimming with young, hungry, intelligent technicians. In fact, I don't think we've had a technically better squad in all the (approaching 40) years I've been seriously watching Liverpool. As fans I think we take for granted a little the fact that - almost to a man - the entire squad plays sensational one and two touch, head up football that's imbued with intelligence and composure. For examples last night, look no further than Harvey Elliott and Jarell Quansah. Harvey has to be the best midfield decision maker for his age I've ever seen. Not only that, his movement and use of the ball are as technically prodigious as they are tactically astute. For a player who has only known the best of the academy era of professional development, maybe those things should be a given (even ignoring the fact that he seems to be levels above all his peers). However, look at the unrelenting desire to maximise every element of his game evident in his clearly improved core strength this season. For inspiration, he's not had far to look and it seems obvious that Mo's mentorship of him is showing itself in a growing physical development that seeks to emulate that of the superstar captain for the night. Harvey was really fucking good last night in a manner that utterly belies his age - a description that can be equally applied to his teammate at left centre half. I don't religiously follow the youth teams at Liverpool, but it's pretty unusual for me to be completely unaware of the names of the various young prospects making waves in our development sides. However, until pre-season this summer, I had never registered Jarell Quansah's name. It therefore feels slightly bizarre that he's made such a seamless, calm and confident transition to first team squad member so quickly. But that's exactly what he is. I've resisted eulogising him too much, despite his obvious technical, tactical, physical and mental strengths as he's yet to be fully tested at this level. No matter that he appears to have the touch, height, pace and strength to play centre half for Liverpool, until I've seen him come under real pressure from the kind of physical duel-happy forwards the Premier League is full of and escape unscathed, I will retain question marks about him. However, until that test is passed, I think it's also fair to consider that maybe the reason he's not come under pressure is as much to do with how he plays as with whom he's faced. Either way, it's getting harder to temper expectations. Nothing will deflect me from my view that we need another left footed defender, but that needn't be at Quansah's expense. In fact it mustn't be. We need to keep him very firmly on this apparently exponential development path he's on because who knows where his ceiling is? In terms of the game itself, despite the front-foot bravery of LASK (or maybe because of it), we played fluent attacking football right from the off which was swiftly rewarded after just twelve minutes with the first goal. Luis Diaz collected the ball running across the edge of the penalty area from the left following a little half-stabbed clearance, and immediately played it out to the overlapping Joe Gomez who hit a lobbed half volley into the six yard box which Diaz ran through to dive and bury himself with a superb flick of his head that left the keeper stranded. This was followed a mere three minutes later with a trademark Cody Gakpo back post tap in from Mo. Salah received a pass from Endo out on the right touchline maybe ten yards inside the opposition half and immediately hit a first-time ball to Diaz on the edge of the D which cut out three opposition players. Unfortunately Diaz mis-controlled the ball, but then pounced as the centre half failed to clear convincingly under pressure from Gakpo, playing in Mo as he ran into the penalty area from the right. He was closed down and challenged as he played the ball in for Gakpo, but it wasn't enough to prevent the assist. You know, assists: they're those stats that Dave reckons are meaningless, even though only a handful of players in the game consistently deliver them in high numbers. No, I'm not letting this one go, regardless of what the data geeks think about them as a stat; why the fuck would we dismiss a statistic that the players themselves are proud of or that some of our lads are setting all-time records for? What next? Tap ins no longer count as goals because they're so easy? There goes a certain a certain centre forward's "career" record. (Sorry John - I know that'll sting a little about your boy, but truth hurts). Anyway, enough about "Kenny" Usher's nonsense, back to the game. Throughout the first half, LASK had a number of instances where they broke through our back line with skill, intelligent movement and purpose. However, virtually every single one was flagged as offside (regardless of the infuriating VAR policy-related late flagging from the linesman). It blows my mind a little how many of our fans are still not used to this because it is an absolutely fundamental part of how we play. You may well find it difficult to watch at times, but it's a well established tactic that, crucially, is brilliantly effective. So despite what commentators or various fans may believe, we didn't actually come under much pressure at all. I only know one team that is able to consistently exert pressure outside the laws of the game and it's not LASK. File this one under the same tab as "Alisson can't kick"; he clearly can as his frequent ability to control the ball with either foot and pass it long or short with total precision attests. Alisson's problem is not his ability to kick effectively; it's his over-confidence in doing so when under a high degree of pressure from opponents. Even then though, it very rarely costs us and so I'm more than happy to see it continue (even if I'll concede that it's nervy to watch at times). So as I said, offside "chances" are not changes; they're offsides. That said, egged on by their consistently loud and supportive away fans, LASK kept plugging away when they could, including deep into the second half when already well beaten. However, they were unable to do anything about multiple further chances and goals for us, including a great effort from the recently revived Kostas who hit an absolute peach that was unlucky to hit the crossbar after he got over the ball well and struck it sweetly. Normal goal-scoring business was resumed soon into the second half though when Gakpo created his own opportunity to go one on one with the keeper and used a good burst of pace to edge the ball away milliseconds before being brought down for a penalty, duly dispatched by Mo to take him onto 199 goals for Liverpool. Another game, another record for the main man. This was also his 16th consecutive game at Anfield with a scoring contribution (I won't mention the A word again) and he extended his European record for a player representing an English club to 44 goals. He's unbelievable - almost literally so. The guy has huge moments every single time he steps onto the pitch, regardless of the narrative around him - including from some of his own fans - that he doesn't dominate games. Chris said on the pod in the summer/early season that he'd give Mo another contract right now and I absolutely agree. We have one of the very best players in our entire history (certainly an all-time eleven player) who is adapting his game for new tactics and team mates in a changing body as he ages and yet he's still there game in, game out delivering. I see absolutely no let up in his hunger and it defies what we know of his ambitions as a player that he's simply biding his time for the Saudi call. That looks years away to me - if it ever comes (I reckon he'll want to retire at the very top with us). The final goal came two minutes into injury time with Gakpo running onto an absolutely perfectly weighted fizzed ball from substitute Trent who'd run through the middle of midfield to do so. Cody cut onto his right and lashed it in beyond the keeper at the far post. 4-0, game over. So, given the other result in the group last night, we have qualified top and don't need to give serious consideration to this competition again until March. Don't get me wrong though - I badly want to win this. And we absolutely should win it too, playing this way. I see no reason at all why Klopp can't complete his clean sweep of trophies with Liverpool in Dublin in the late spring of next year. However, it's not just the prospect of further silverware that I'm appreciating about this competition; I'm also delighted to see how positively its affected our development, both accelerating and honing our transition into a new way of playing with lots of new or changing players. I'd never have chosen this route forward last season, but now we're here, I think it's obvious that Champions League participation would have made it far harder to rotate and develop players in the way we have so far in this campaign. Star Man is Cody who had arguably his best performance for us, with nods to Harvey, Joe G and the consistently classy Gravenberch too. And so onto December which brings a step change in challenge for us, both in terms of the quality of opponent and the frequency of matches. However, as I've said repeatedly on the pod this season, could any of us seriously have expected such a rapid development in our football by this stage of the campaign? It seems that yet again Jurgen is defying received wisdom of what's possible in football and long may it continue. Given our strength at Anfield, I'm expecting a big December from us, regardless of the quality of opponent coming to try their luck. I remain focused on second as a realistic prediction of where we'll end the campaign. However, throw into the mix highly possible European and domestic cup wins and it's starting to feel like there's a really great end to a highly enjoyable campaign on the way. Come on you Reds!!! Team: Kelleher; Gomez, Konate (Alexander-Arnold), Quansah, Tsimikas (Chambers); Endo, Elliott, Gravenberch (Bradley); Salah (Nunez), Gakpo, Diaz (Jones): View full article

Haha, Maguire's body language, like a bloke walking away from a toilet he's blocked.

Waking up this morning and finding that I am now 61.

Johnny would claim they gained no sporting advantage from over-spending. If the blues are still shit, you have to acquit

My daughter is a teacher at a school for kids with special educational needs that has recently been deemed outstanding by OFSTED. They do amazing work there getting through to kids that can't go to a mainstream school. They had a burst pipe about 3 weeks ago that caused a lot of damage, carpets, bean bags, iPads, laptops amongst other things including a brand new floor that lifted. The carpets and flooring was covered by insurance, the laptops, iPads etc weren't and they couldn't get funding to replace them leaving the kids without. What sort of country is it when staff have to set up a Go Fund Me page to try and raise the money needed to give these kids, all SEN, the tools they need to give them the best chance in life. It's shameful and it's all on the Tories. Bastards every one of them.

My GOT ban is up! Get in.

Unashamed to say there's been tears here. Lost an absolute legend. RIP Shane.

"It was revenge for speaking out about the Sly 6. They were made guys and there was nothing we could do about it"

At this stage last season we had 22 points, 6 wins, 4 draws and 4 losses, we were 6th, 15 points behind the leaders, Arsenal. Just saying.

Didn't go for a shit, didn't go for a piss, sat here and saw both goals. Now covered in shit and piss. Allez allez allez

My experience seems to be a bit different from most on here. I’ve pretty much had the same group of friends since I started secondary school at eleven years of age. I was fifty one in October. A few have come and gone over the years, but there’s still a hardcore of about eight of us that see each other most weeks. We still go out most Saturday afternoons. Some weeks there might only be three out, other weeks it’s a full attendance, but rarely a week goes by when at least some of the group don’t meet up. We’ve survived absences caused by things like University, petty fall outs, unmentionable differences, or falling in love and drifting away for a period. We even survived one of my friends, having a relationship with one of my other friend's mothers (they ended up living together for a few years). In the way that men do, we’ve supported each other through heartbreak, divorce, bereavement, financial difficulties, addiction, and relegation in the unmentionable. Forty years in, the cracks are there like never before though. Some of that is just a result of some of us growing apart. I don’t have much in common with a few of them these days, other than a multi decade friendship. Drugs have played their part. Some do, some don’t. One that does, now has real issues, at least two that don’t struggle a lot with those that do. All are, or have been, heavy drinkers but that has been more a bond than something that divides. So far at least. For the first time ever, I can take it or leave it. Part of that’s them, most of it is just about where I am in life now. My mental health, in particular, isn’t good and I’d rather be at home in bed most of the time. I do consider myself lucky though. We’ve had some great times in the past, and I’m sure we’ll just get through this rocky period and have some more in the future.

Spare a thought for the traffic-beaters near me who watched us lose 3-2. Spare the thought "Dickheads!" for them.

Prince Charles over here.

It’s what happens when you award pay rises and tell heads to find the money out of existing budgets repeatedly. Budgets which are already decimated due to years of underinvestment and budgetary slights of hands are now stretched beyond breaking point. It’s a genuine wonder that some schools have managed to stay open, let alone provide a provision for the students in their care. Some truly remarkable people doing remarkable things in the face of unrelenting punching down from the government. You know what they need, demonising, that’ll do it. Fuck the Tories.

Guardian. Say what you like about the crowd at Goodison Park, but they are really good at booing. They’ve had plenty of practice in recent years, of course, but, still, there was something viscerally impressive about the boos before kick-off. It began as a low moan, like the agonised groan of a brontosaurus dying in a distant valley, then built slowly, rumbling mournfully through the old stadium, gaining in depth and plaintiveness and volume to finally break in a mighty foghorn of despair summoned from the guts of all Evertonians. They had already booed the two blokes in dark rain-jackets who brought out the Premier League signage, as well as the six ballboys who, with an understandable degree of hesitation, unfurled the Premier League flag. Poor John Brooks, the referee, was booed as a representative of the evil empire that has done Everton down before even blowing for kick-off

Work-rate. Incisiveness. Nous. I don't ask for much. This is how it's gonna be. Build from the ground up. The further we go in the Europa League, the more Sunday 2:00pm games we're likely to have. Unless it's a big fixture that Sky want for their Super Sunday slot, we'll be the early game and most likely won't be televised. Having guaranteed top spot in the group thus avoiding the play-off round in February against a Champions League dropout, we don't really need to put any oomph into our last game in Belgium against Union SG. There will be greater focus on the league fixtures up to the winter break in early January. In that spell, we also have a League Cup quarter final against West Ham, plus I think the FA Cup 3rd Round is before the winter break. A chance to maintain our current momentum and even build on it. Last season's game against Fulham was decided by a first half Mo penalty after a clumsy foul on Darwin, who nicked the ball off a dithering defender who was about to hoof the ball clear and ended up making contact with the Uruguayan chaos merchant instead. Mo blasted his spot kick straight down the middle. We didn't create a great deal, and Ali had to be alert to make two decent saves from efforts by Carlos Vinicius. Prior to his goal, Mo had also had our best chance of the first half when he got in behind on the right and tried to loft to ball over the keeper from a very narrow angle. I can't blame him for going for it as he has shown himself to be fully capable of scoring from there. In the second half, our only moment of note was a low effort wide from 25 yards by Hendo. Fulham lost Mitrovic in the summer and came close to losing Palhinha too. Both were key to the team being comfortably safe last season, with the goalscoring prowess of the former being aided by the all-action defensive midfield shield of the latter. He is a good player is Palhinha, but I can't help think he's a bit Morgan Schneiderlin. Looks very good in a mid-table set-up but as soon as he goes up a level, he looks ordinary. If Palhinha follows the Schneiderlin route and ends up at Everton, he's definitely gone wrong somewhere! They've added Jimenez from Wolves and still have the likes of Willian, Wilson and De Cordova-Reid, but goals have been more of an issue for them this season. They needed a couple of contentious VAR calls against Wolves to get the win on Monday night. We have probably been on the end of the worst VAR intervention but Wolves are out on their own in terms of how many times they've been screwed over by VAR, especially this season. You never hear of the Howard Webb apology tour winding its way over to Wolverhampton though. Maybe SYP have a long-standing beef with their West Midlands counterparts. Ali and Diogo will be out for this one, and Robbo and Thiago are still to return to training. Queef will start in goal, and I think the midfield against LASK will all be on the bench as we go with Mac, Dom and Curtis. Harvey can consider himself unfortunate were he to be benched as he has been very good in the last few weeks, including international duty with the under 21s. Whatever the line-up, the concentration, motivation, attitude and applicable need to be spot-on from first minute to last. 3 points please. Get it done!

We got the Wolves, right next to the Toon army. We got the Hammers, stood alongside Forest fans. Nobody, gives a fuck about the blue boys. And that suckerrrrrs, ain't a miracle. Can, you, dig iiiiiit!?! Okay listen up out there boppers. Word on the steeet is an off-brand outfit from Queensferry are looking to parley, but if they think they're gonna get that 10 point penalty quashed, think again. This is for Everton fans. Nowhere to run, nowhere to hide.

Well done to Dave for getting this out tonight so people can enjoy it first thing in the morning. We finished recording at around half 9 and it's at least an hour or so of editing, exporting and uploading to do. Nice one, mate.

I'm not into the idea of capital punishment except for when any red calls him 'pep'

Haaland looks like he wears an inside out mask of his own face.

No-one, apart from Evertonians, gives a sausage about their stadium. They are irrelevant in footballing terms to the rest of the country, apart from supporters of those teams cheated out of a premiership place by them. That's the bit they don't get. Nobody has it in for them, they just like to believe it so it gives them something to cry about. They need to fuck off. They're the footballing equivalent of Gemma Collins. She exists to make other people feel better about themselves, as her life's work seems to be about constantly announcing to the world how thick she is. Everton fans do the same in a footballing sense. Constantly whining just to make other fans feel better about themselves. And of course, they're both fucking irritating.

Dear Santa, I never ask for much, but...

He's got a point: the unlawful killing of 97 people and the subsequent cover-up and smear campaign is definitely comparable to a club being punished for persistently breaking the rules.

City should be punished they say. Well it didn't bother you in 2014 when it was hilarious to wind up der redshite about them not winning the league. Also you could have made an effort in that game and you might have got into the CL which would have brought you more money and better players and you might not have been in such a shit state years down the line. It was more important though for the redshite not to win the league though and for City to "save football". A phrase they repeated again in 2020.

Hahahahaha. They’ve stolen mentality monsters. Just tweeted this to see how many bites I get. Bus greetings - kopite behaviour. Subsequently stolen. Fireworks and flares - kopite behaviour. Subsequently stolen. Protests - kopite behaviour. Subsequently stolen. Mentality monsters - kopite behaviour. Subsequently stolen. EFC - The Thieves Club.

“The wicked creature, grim and greedy, was at the ready, savage and cruel, and seized in their rest four of the match officials.” - Beowulf

Haaland is fucking fuming…

But why would anyone give him any sort of platform, he looks like he makes the tea on building sites.

“Now go get your fucking cuckoo clock”

Any team that sends out Anthony Gordon every week can't complain about dodgy calls. Fuck 'em.

The most deluded, easily led set of toxic scruffs you ever did see. They literally have no argument here. The corrupt shouts started about 2 seasons ago when a few decisions went against them. Strangely the same season we were going for the Quadruple. Last season - barely a peep when we fell off a cliff. This season they've resurrected it because they were caught cheating and must have been expecting what......a small fine? Harsh language? The Birch? Absolute mentalist fanbase.

Schroedinger’s Twats

Not sure where the Tsimikas hate is coming from. Robbo and Trent have both give up goals by being beaten at the far post. He’ll, at one point Trent was forging himself a new career out of it. Our problems today didn’t come down our left. It was the amount of times they got in down our right flank which was hurting us.

Let’s not take the piss out of a bloke for having a job. There’s plenty else to take the piss out of him for.

I've just been sat here watching the Ronnie O'Sullivan documentary and thought... You leave school and unless you're a very clever bastard you end up pissing up with work mates/uni mates whatever. All of a sudden you find yourself. You're drinking etc with them yeah this is great. All the while your years are passing on and you get addicted to either being out doing that or searching for them highs. Then you get older but you still think you can reach them highs going out. Go out with mates, same laughs etc but some get kids, wives the whole shit. But the reality is you're masking something, I personally would hate to know who I am underneath. I can go a while without a drink and my bird always says "see you're fucking great" or something along them lines because I've fixed the roof or some shit. But it's not enjoyable. Then you realise you don't really wanna see your mates sober. Then you're alone.