Describing films, accurately, but with an odd view point.

[Unrighteous]

The Beach

 

Seeking to escape tourists, in order to have a good vacation, Richard flees to a secluded Island near Thailand to join a small community of like-minded individuals. After integrating himself to the local community, Richard slowly realises that the problem wasn't the other tourists, but the human taint on the environment in general.

 

 

 

Superbad

 

A chubby sadcase, and his (somewhat unlikely) hetero-lifemate, embark on a harrowing journey to lower high school girl's inhibitions and take advantage of them with their sick sexual perversions.

 

 

 

Star Wars

 

A young, rural moisture farmer, Luke Skywalker, is the focus of this film, which documents the conversion of a young man from a naive farmboy to a member of a fundamentalist terrorist group. The story culminates with a single, profoundly devastating, act of terrorism that claims an untold lives...

[JER]

The Firm

 

A very short lawyer has a vacation in the friendly deep south, and enjoys some scuba diving.

[razor]

A New York émigré who fails to understand the culture of his new home, a small seaside resort, goes fishing with friends.

 

 

Do you need the title, or can you guess?

[Ezekiel 25:17]

Titanic

 

Tramp bangs whore on a boat that sinks.

[AL66GOLF]

Rocky 1, 2, 3, 4...............54,55

Old Dwarf with speech impediment loses fight, chases chickens, runs up steps, wins fight, loses fight, wins fight, loses fight ............... yawn.........

[razor]

A woman has a penis.

 

The Crying Game

[redheart]

People live in a shopping Mall and enjoy stuff and then get bored. The boredom is alleviated by a bike gang and dead people shuffling

[stevebaby]

Three children go to a private school in the countryside.They study,play sport and eventually complete their education.

 

 

Harry Potter

[Hooch]

Terminator

 

Austrian bodybuilder with cool sunglasses hunts down some bint, leaving a path of death and destruction in his wake. Also, the Austrian bodybuilder is a robot from the future.

[Ezekiel 25:17]

Apollo Creed and The terminator get chased around the park by Mario Melchiott.

 

 

Predator.

[Mel Wood]

Great white shark follows millons of years of instilled predatory/scavenging behaviour and, without malice, eats a number of what it presumes are large seals.

Local people go way out of their way to seek confrontation and blow it up instead of installing shark nets and just avoiding the toothy motherfucker's habitat.

[Antynwa]

Avatar

 

Ethnic Cleansing in Space

[Josef Svejk]

The Passion of The Christ.

 

Jesus is murdered by Jews.

[Redder Lurtz]

The Passion of The Christ.

 

Jesus is murdered by Jews.

 

I believe that was Mel Gibson's original intended strapline for the film.

[Stu Monty]

Great science fiction films featuring Keanu Reaves.

 

 

The Matrix sequels, apparently.

[Steve Holt]

A midget steal some priceless jewellery and melts it down.

[joeyk]

Great white shark follows millons of years of instilled predatory/scavenging behaviour and, without malice, eats a number of what it presumes are large seals.

Local people go way out of their way to seek confrontation and blow it up instead of installing shark nets and just avoiding the toothy motherfucker's habitat.

 

Excellent ! Have to spread first. If someone could oblige.

[Guest davelfc]

The Green Mile: Large uneducated black man with the power to bring things back to life tries to save the lives of two young girls who have been raped and killed. The crowd searching for the girls comes across the large man who is crying because he could not save them, they instantly blame him for the rape and murder and he is sentenced to the electric chair.

 

While in prison the large man demonstrates to prison officers that he has special powers, to the point that they believe him innocent.

 

Knowing him to be innocent but having no real evidence they kill him anyway in the electric chair. The prison guard in charge (having been given part of the large mans powers earlier) has to watch all of his friends and family die as he has seemingly been 'infected with life' from the large man.

[razor]

Great white shark follows millons of years of instilled predatory/scavenging behaviour and, without malice, eats a number of what it presumes are large seals.

Local people go way out of their way to seek confrontation and blow it up instead of installing shark nets and just avoiding the toothy motherfucker's habitat.

 

A New York émigré who fails to understand the culture of his new home, a small seaside resort, goes fishing with friends.

 

I think we're talking about the same film. But we have different views of it. But, hey, that's what critics' reviews are all about.

[Rex Banner]

Four young boys embark on a journey of self discovery and fulfilment in the face of war and religious upheaval.

 

South Park movie.

[Markmywords]

A short cheesy bloke and and a taller more goofy bloke enter a flying competition. Along the way they indulge in homoerotic past times such as posing in white y-fronts and greasing each other up before games of beach volleyball.

 

The goofy one then dies and the cheesy one then becomes a little bit more serious. He also manages to have intercourse with his teacher.

 

Top Gun

[The-Sir]

I saw this movie about a bus that had to SPEED around a city, keeping its SPEED over fifty, and if its SPEED dropped, it would explode! I think it was called "The Bus That Couldn't Slow Down."

[stevebaby]

Butter salesman gets bum's rush.

 

 

 

Last Tango In Paris.

[JohnnyH]

Teeth.

 

American History X

[Josef Svejk]

A young chap named Ferris Bueller takes a day off school.

 

Any guesses?