The Ailment thread

[Champ]

My entire right leg is numb and feels like a dead weight. Started off as pins and needles in my foot about a week and a half ago but it's progressed right up to above my arse cheek. I'm limping around, dragging my foot behind me like something out of The Walking Dead. Basic tasks like putting socks on or walking upstairs are becoming harder by the day. I'm an actual retard.

Had blood tests done at the doctors, nothing wrong. Got to go for an MRI scan on my back later this week.

Now this is the part where Stig or Stringvest tell me it's because of the jeans I've been wearing but I'd like to know if anyone else has had anything like this? What is it? Dog aids?

No update. I fear the worst

[magicrat]

No update. I fear the worst

Yep, He's gone.

Head on collision with another wheelchair

[Lee909]

Can a mod rename this 'The Cpt Turdseye memorial thread'.

[Captain Turdseye]

Found out this morning that it'll be April before I see someone on the NHS. In the waiting room at the chiropractors as we speak.

[Bjornebye]

Found out this morning that it'll be April before I see someone on the NHS. In the waiting room at the chiropractors as we speak.

 

Good luck mate hope they get rid of it so you can get back to walking like a spaz without the pain 

[magicrat]

Found out this morning that it'll be April before I see someone on the NHS. In the waiting room at the chiropractors as we speak.

Snake oil merchants. You'll feel better for about 5 minutes after they crunch your spine for half an hour . Get a decent physio if you can and do some recommended exercises every day. No quick fix for these things.

[Trumo]

You might actually end up with a peg leg. Best visit that pet shop on your way back and ask for a Norwegian Blue.

[Champ]

Found out this morning that it'll be April before I see someone on the NHS. In the waiting room at the chiropractors as we speak.

And ordered you to do light duties only, I imagine?

[Captain Turdseye]

He sweet talked me, made me strip to my boxers and then we wrestled for a while. £45 well spent.

[Champ]

He sweet talked me, made me strip to my boxers and then we wrestled for a while. £45 well spent.

 

So, who diagnosed you correctly? I had you down for a trapped nerve

[Trumo]

He sweet talked me, made me strip to my boxers and then we wrestled for a while. £45 well spent.

 

Stig would have done that for free.

[General Dryness]

He sweet talked me, made me strip to my boxers and then we wrestled for a while. £45 well spent.

 

Cool. So how did you get on at the Chiropracters then?

[Captain Turdseye]

So, who diagnosed you correctly? I had you down for a trapped nerve

Multiple trapped nerves he reckons. Said normally a trapped nerve would leave you with either pins and needles, increased sensitivity or weakness in the limb. I've got all three. Gave me stretches to do, told me to get some ice on my lower back and also to keep my feet up as much as possible. Going back on Tuesday, I'll give him 3 appointments and if I don't see any improvement I'll have to go to A&E.

[Champ]

Multiple trapped nerves he reckons. Said normally a trapped nerve would leave you with either pins and needles, increased sensitivity or weakness in the limb. I've got all three. Gave me stretches to do, told me to get some ice on my lower back and also to keep my feet up as much as possible. Going back on Tuesday, I'll give him 3 appointments and if I don't see any improvement I'll have to go to A&E.

 

Its all that washing up that's done for you

[Captain Turdseye]

Can you stop taking the piss and just bake me some bread or something?

[Bjornebye]

Can you stop taking the piss and just bake me some bread or something?

 

hahaha, yeah Champ, sort it out

 

Turdseye yer frigging walrus 

[stringvest]

He sweet talked me, made me strip to my boxers and then we wrestled for a while. £45 well spent.

 

Give my regards to Stig next time you see him

[Captain Turdseye]

Definitely worse after seeing the chiropractor. I've now got backache, searing pain in the knee when walking and the numbness in my foot has gone to another level. Struggling to lift the leg and completely unaware of where the foot is gonna land when trying to walk. Just had a row with Mrs Turdseye because she laughed at me nearly falling over. Looks like a trip to A&E in the morning.

 

I'd go now but it will be heaving cos it's Saturday night, plus I'm about to open my 3rd beer to go with the strong painkillers I've managed to acquire.

[Alan Sex]

Thought I had plantar fasciitis, turned out to be achilles tendonitis. Hurts like a bitch.

 

I picked up a night splint which holds it in a stretched position. Fucking medieval torture device. Seems to be helping a bit though.

[stringvest]

Just as well you two are not horses. And I say this in a caring way.

[Bjornebye]

Im fucking hungover. 

[Captain Turdseye]

Waited four hours at the hospital. Eventually got called into a room by an Asian chap who kept calling me 'My Dear'. He then shoved a finger up my arse, much to the delight of Mrs Turdseye, before telling me that all he could do is suggest to my GP that he tries to book me an earlier appointment with a neurologist than the one I've been given so far.

 

So I still can't walk but I can scratch 'Being finger banged by an Indian' off my to do list.

 

Pissed off, man.

[Carvalho Diablo]

Had to go for an ECG this week.

 

Called into the hozzy in my dinner break, the nurse asks whether she should shave my chest (!). No way that was gonna happen, anyhow, she fucking literally ripped the sticky things back off my chest when the ECG had finished.

 

It's fair to say my chest now resembles a fucking chess board.

[Bjornebye]

Waited four hours at the hospital. Eventually got called into a room by an Asian chap who kept calling me 'My Dear'. He then shoved a finger up my arse, much to the delight of Mrs Turdseye, before telling me that all he could do is suggest to my GP that he tries to book me an earlier appointment with a neurologist than the one I've been given so far.

 

So I still can't walk but I can scratch 'Being finger banged by an Indian' off my to do list.

 

Pissed off, man.

 

This is fucking great news. hahahahahahahaha finger banged by an asian fella in-front of your bird. The best thing is its a leg problem is it not? hahahahaha did he wiggle it about? 

[Trumo]

Waited four hours at the hospital. Eventually got called into a room by an Asian chap who kept calling me 'My Dear'. He then shoved a finger up my arse, much to the delight of Mrs Turdseye, before telling me that all he could do is suggest to my GP that he tries to book me an earlier appointment with a neurologist than the one I've been given so far.

 

So I still can't walk but I can scratch 'Being finger banged by an Indian' off my to do list.

 

Pissed off, man.

 

Did you see a doctor after that though?