Who works for the CRB?

[Ezekiel 25:17]

Make sure you wear a monocle. Never fails.

 

Only if coupled with a tweed Deerstalker.

 

A bow-tie that spins. Everyone love a zany character in the office who thinks they are fun.

 

 

All good suggestions, talk in a cockney accent aswell, if you look like this, you're on the right track:

 

 

 

 

 

[hamstrung]

Here is a quick instructional video.

 

[YOUTUBE]FdpqH1_EC7A[/YOUTUBE]

[Ezekiel 25:17]

Another good tip is, remember why you entered that room and just what you want out of it, don't let them whittle you down to 50% of your whole company for 16p, it will be overwhelming but hold your composure. Oh and a guy with crazy eyes will lead you in, DO NOT STARE AT HIM.

[Sugar Ape]

Bastard, I never got a letter!

 

My letter was only dated yesterday, so they are probably still sending them out the rest of this week. I am sure you will have one soon.

Good luck!

[Fugitive]

Here are a few techniques you could utilise...

 

[YOUTUBE]lHqtijd65VY[/YOUTUBE]

[RoboRiise]

I work for HMRC and I don't have GSI internet access during the day at work.

 

 

 

Fuckin' CRB.

[Nomad]

I work for HMRC and I don't have GSI internet access during the day at work.

 

 

 

Fuckin' CRB.

 

neither do most of the staff at CRB

[Nomad]

Got my letter today, I have an interview for next Thursday.

Anyone got any tips on the interview and what to wear etc...

Thanks.

 

smart clothes are always a good start

 

and listen to the question asked dont ramble on about pointless stuff. if you dont answer the question how they want it they will reword it in a different way.

 

good luck mate

[WaltonRed]

When does the job actually start if you get one?

[Nomad]

All different dates mate. just depends on when your security clearance comes back

[Section_31]

It's all academic anyway, as soon as the Tories get in an Indian call centre will be given your jobs, you wasteful public sector fucks - don't think I don't know about your en mass secondments to London at the cost of 100k plus hotel fees, I've got people on the inside. *insert whistling smiley face here*

[Nomad]

It's all academic anyway, as soon as the Tories get in an Indian call centre will be given your jobs, you wasteful public sector fucks - don't think I don't know about your en mass secondments to London at the cost of 100k plus hotel fees, I've got people on the inside. *insert whistling smiley face here*

 

One of the lads in work is going to london for 6 months to clear a backlog on the police systems and he not staying in a hotel so your fucking wrong............he got his own apartment with a gym and pool instead :whistle:

[WaltonRed]

A big fat rejection letter landed on my doormat before.

 

For fucks sake.

 

i'm going to do a masters

[Lucky Pierre]

Did it say why?

[WaltonRed]

I must of failed in the skills and behaviours bit.

 

Cunts.

 

I'm going vote Tory so they all lose their jobs and the whole process gets moved to India.

 

Bitter, not me! ha!

[Section_31]

A big fat rejection letter landed on my doormat before.

 

For fucks sake.

 

i'm going to do a masters

 

Go for it mate.

[philyhamann]

Shit that. The NHS are getting 50-60 applications per job they put up now too, I dunno how I got mine. Probably people shitting it with the flu.

[WaltonRed]

I'm bitter that there will be people with less qualifications than me who have gotten an interview because they filled in a silly box with words they wanted.

 

why you couldnt put qualifications and job experience down is beyond me.

 

I may as well wipe my arse on my degree.

[philyhamann]

My mate finished with a first from Liverpool Uni and his employment since has been

 

- McDonalds

 

- Call Center

 

fuckin shiiiit

[hamstrung]

There's a definite skill (and techniques you can learn) to interviewing, CV writing, application filling etc.

 

I'd be PM'ing TLW's recruitment consultants if I were in your position.

[Nomad]

I'm bitter that there will be people with less qualifications than me who have gotten an interview because they filled in a silly box with words they wanted.

 

why you couldnt put qualifications and job experience down is beyond me.

 

I may as well wipe my arse on my degree.

 

Sorry to hear that mate. its shit realy a mate of mine failed aswell. God know why you have to do Skills and behaviours i think its a goverment thing its not just the CRB.

 

If im being honest with you if you have a degree then your probly better you didnt get it its shit mate and if you did get it you would have been put on the section that is soooo fucking boring. i know its no consolation because you got rejected but honestly its balls. this forum keeps me sane throughout the day and as an AO you wouldnt of had that

[Section_31]

I'm bitter that there will be people with less qualifications than me who have gotten an interview because they filled in a silly box with words they wanted.

 

why you couldnt put qualifications and job experience down is beyond me.

 

I may as well wipe my arse on my degree.

 

My mate finished with a first from Liverpool Uni and his employment since has been

 

- McDonalds

 

- Call Center

 

fuckin shiiiit

 

 

You need to specialise these days, it's the only way. Pick a skill or profession and pick up some industry recognised qualifications. Just having 'a degree' still opens doors - for instance you can teach abroad, China and Japan won't touch you unless you've got a degree, plus there's always the option of a teaching or lawyers qualification down the line - you need a degree for those.

 

Try not to get negative about it WaltonRed, my mate's got an interview but he's got all sorts under his belt, he's done IT jobs at airports and all sorts - because of the current job situation you'll probably find the caliber of those going for the posts is unusually high in terms of experience.

 

You've also got the possibility that you were discounted for a trivial reason on your form - HR departments are the gatekeepers these days, they're anal and they're not especially bright (I've temped in one, I know what it's like)

 

We've got a lad on work experience in our place who is 40 and spent 9 years editing a magazine in Singapore, and he can't even get an interview for a shitty PR job because of the hoops he's expected to jump through - as he said, there was a time you could just call up the boss and have an informal chat about a job - now it's all box-ticking.

[Sugar Ape]

The application was a joke, it took me ages to do it but a mate of mine got someone else to fill his in for him. He is still waiting to hear back but it is silly he might get an interview on the back of someone else filling his form in whilst other people fill their own in themselves, probably to a good level, and don't get an interview. The skills and behavioural application is open to cheating more than a standard application form.

To be honest if I get the job I will be leaving a better paid job to go there, but there are just no prospects to progress in my current workplace and I am hoping there are more chances for promotion in the CRB.

[WaltonRed]

Sorry to hear that mate. its shit realy a mate of mine failed aswell. God know why you have to do Skills and behaviours i think its a goverment thing its not just the CRB.

 

If im being honest with you if you have a degree then your probly better you didnt get it its shit mate and if you did get it you would have been put on the section that is soooo fucking boring. i know its no consolation because you got rejected but honestly its balls. this forum keeps me sane throughout the day and as an AO you wouldnt of had that

 

His name isnt Jules is it?

[Sugar Ape]

Had my interview today, should know if I have the job by the middle of next week.