What the fuck??? Part 27

[She Knows It]

Wirral teenagers given lessons on how to catch a bus

 

A COUNCIL is offering to spend £300 a head teaching teenagers how to catch a bus.

 

Wirral’s “Travel Training” service can be accessed by anyone over 16 and explains paying your fare, getting on a train or bus and of course, how to get off at the right stop.

 

While opponents can see the benefits for the learning impaired, questions are being asked about the use of the money by a council pushing through a programme of library closures.

 

Matthew Elliott, chief executive of the Taxpayers’ Alliance, said: “In some rare cases it may well be necessary to help people learn to use public transport, but for most kids formal lessons simply aren’t necessary.

 

“The vast majority know how to use the bus already, and most others could pick it up from their parents or just through common sense.

 

“Given Wirral Council’s financial problems, they would be well advised to cut back frivolous spending like this rather than slashing frontline services like libraries.”

 

The scheme was highlighted at an event held for the council’s partners and voluntary agencies this month. The course also offers help on dealing with “what ifs” such as a bus running late or missing your stop.

 

Wirral Transport Users Association (WTUA) questioned why the scheme is open to over-16s without disabilities or language barriers.

 

John Ryan of WTUA said: “This won’t be any use to the great majority of teenagers who simply learn to use public transport when they get on with their friends or with their parents.

 

“You could certainly understand it if it was intended to cater for people with learning disabilities but assistance like that would be available elsewhere.

 

Councillor Jean Quinn, outgoing chairman of Merseyside Strategic Transport Partnership, said: “By increasing people’s ability and confidence to use public transport, we are able to contribute to improving the quality of life and allow people to access a wider range of opportunities whether these are employment, healthcare, education or visiting family, friends or recreation and leisure facilities.”

[rb14]

What's a "bus"? The only thing I know is that you've got an arse like the back end of one. Are they teaching kids to use your arse? If I paid tax, I'd want my money back.

[She Knows It]

I'd be interested to know just how many Wirral teens you've had riding your arse.

[RedEagle]

I think some people are ignorant towards schemes like this, I do know kids who would'nt have a fucking clue how to catch aids never mind a bus.For that reason i'm in.

[Stu Monty]

How hard is it to learn how to use a poor wagon? We really do need a bit of an injection of natural selection here. There's all sorts of raggedy-arsed, slow-as-fuck wilderbest that are slowing the pack right down and we don't seem to understand that they need to be left to be eaten.

 

Or at least they need to know that if they don't shape up then they will be Lion-feed.

[She Knows It]

I think some people are ignorant towards schemes like this, I do know kids who would'nt have a fucking clue how to catch aids never mind a bus.For that reason i'm in.

 

I take it you're not a Wirral resident? It's my bloody council tax paying for this shit!! £300 per head!

 

I'll tell you why so many of this younger generation are brain dead mongoloids. Because we spoon feed them shit like this, which perpetuates them never needing to show one ounce of bleeding gumption. I never needed a lesson on how to get a bus. I just got on, told the driver where I was going, he told me how much the fare was and I paid it. And if I had have needed a lesson (which I didn't, because even at a young age I had a modicum of functioning grey matter), it certainly wouldn't have cost three hundred buggering quid to tell me the above steps.

 

(It probably would have cost about 2/6d)

[AVEEZ]

I think this is ace. Lessons on catching the bus.. what did you do today dear.. er I learnt how to sit on a seat on the bus.. awww well thats lovely.. have a certificate!

 

Brill

[RedEagle]

I take it you're not a Wirral resident? It's my bloody council tax paying for this shit!! £300 per head!

 

I'll tell you why so many of this younger generation are brain dead mongoloids. Because we spoon feed them shit like this, which perpetuates them never needing to show one ounce of bleeding gumption. I never needed a lesson on how to get a bus. I just got on, told the driver where I was going, he told me how much the fare was and I paid it. And if I had have needed a lesson (which I didn't, because even at a young age I have a modicum of functioning grey matter), it certainly wouldn't have cost three hundred buggering quid to tell me the above steps.

 

(It probably would have cost about 2/6d)

 

This just proves my point about people being ignorant towards these schemes times are changing,its time for you to change and man-up love.

[Paulie Dangerously]

If it teaches the little scumbags not to smoke, play their scousehouse really loud or spit on the floor then it can only be a good idea. Plus it's not my council tax. Win, Win

[havarantagain]

How hard is it to learn how to use a poor wagon? We really do need a bit of an injection of natural selection here. There's all sorts of raggedy-arsed, slow-as-fuck wilderbest that are slowing the pack right down and we don't seem to understand that they need to be left to be eaten.

 

Or at least they need to know that if they don't shape up then they will be Lion-feed.

You and me should be in power, Not these numpty's that come up with these community enhancement schemes. Dig a trench and fill them with the fuckers.

Whats next councils to run a course on the difference between your right and your left hand sides. My bloods on the boil again.

[Section_31]

The course also offers help on dealing with “what ifs” such as a bus running late or missing your stop.

 

That had me in absolute stitches! They should get Bear Grylls to show them just to make it even better.

[Anubis]

You may all laugh, but have any of you actually observed the youth of today? Most of them need lessons in remembering to breathe, let alone catch a bus.

[Ben]

The reason my most people don't use the bus is not because they don't know how, it's because they are uncomfortable, slow and expensive and often have one or more of the following features:

Surly driver.

Stench of urine.

Chewing gum on seat.

Obnoxious youths playing shitty music through tinny mobile phone speakers whilst swearing and spitting.

Old people.

 

£300 a head is also ridiculous all you need to do is have the course at the bus station when they apply send them the local bus timetable a few simple instructions. Greet them when they successfully get off the bus with a big hug and a cup of tea, give them a certificate and send them home.

 

Try spending the money on improving the bus routes and the service and make it fucking cheaper. If there's 3 of you it is normally a bit more expensive but so much more convinient to get a taxi. If there's 4 or 5 of you it's a no brainer.

[Joe Le Taxi]

You may all laugh, but have any of you actually observed the youth of today? Most of them need lessons in remembering to breathe, let alone catch a bus.

 

Fuck off. I know how to catch a bus.

[RoboRiise]

Fuck off. I know how to catch a bus.

 

 

Set your feet firmly, get your body behind it and watch it all the way into your hands?

[Unrighteous]

Who the fuck doesn't know how to catch a bus? Seriously? Are they able to tie their shoes and like... eat a meal without spilling half of it down their shirt?

[RJ Fan club]

Set your feet firmly, get your body behind it and watch it all the way into your hands?

 

Single decker = fingers down.

 

Double decker = Fingers up.

 

You never forget that shit you were taught at cricket training

[Joe Le Taxi]

Set your feet firmly, get your body behind it and watch it all the way into your hands?

 

Brilliant.

[RoboRiise]

Who the fuck doesn't know how to catch a bus? Seriously? Are they able to tie their shoes and like... eat a meal without spilling half of it down their shirt?

 

 

Not before taking the advanced modules. I believe the prerequisites are two A Levels at grades A-E.

[RJ Fan club]

Not before taking the advanced modules. I believe the prerequisites are two A Levels at grades A-E.

 

They probably accept General Studies. *Shudders*

[Remmie]

Fuck off. I know how to catch a bus.

Only because you had several lessons.

[AVEEZ]

I catch the bus every day and rarely experience any problems at all.. no smell of wee wee, no yooves playing loud music, no spitting, swearing or chewing gum on the seats.. a surly driver is unfortunately par for the course but hardly the end of the world..

[stevebaby]

"Wipe until it's clean".

Here's a certificate to do it with.

[slimshady]

If it teaches the little scumbags not to smoke, play their scousehouse really loud or spit on the floor then it can only be a good idea. Plus it's not my council tax. Win, Win

 

What makes you think that if they can catch a bus they are gonna be any better behaved? I can see it now -

 

"Fuck smoking, playing our scousehouse really loud or spitting on the floor - I'm gonna spend my time catching a bus!!!!!"

 

- "Look out, here it comes....!"