House fixy-uppy shit

[Stu Monty]

Okay. I know I may have insinuated in the past that you're all fucking useless and not worth a blow on an old trumpet but that was all just high jinx. Honest.

 

I'm looking at a house to buy. It's in a location I like but it needs work. I'm trying to work out if the work it needs doing is going to be too steep to offset the benefit of getting it cheaper (possibly £15k under my budget).

 

This might be a bit vague but I'm looking for some sort of decent gauge as to what I should be costing for some various stuff.

 

It'll need:

 

A kitchen

A kitchen floor

Decorating in 3 decent size bedrooms, living room, kitchen (possibly hall/stairs)

Carpet in those rooms.

Possibly doors. There's be 5 or 6 of the fuckers if we did it.

Also possibly needs an upgrade on the bathroom.

 

Tell me if I'm miles off with this:

 

Kitchen: up to £4k for a decent Ikea one?

Decorating: A bit over a grand for someone else to do it?

Carpets: No idea, mate reckons £700 from a good place near him, how much for labour?

Kitchen floor: No idea?

Doors: Same?

 

Also, as an aside. Can I knock a downstairs toilet and the wall through and how much will that shit cost eventually (probably further down the line). I'm reading mental things online that say it's against regulations but that you can do it anyway?

 

I'm just throwing this up here as I'm currently trying to research the lot and know that there's bound to be some clued up fuckers on here to help with that research. Only saw it the other day so still mulling it over.

 

*Shines a big GF DIY light into the night sky*

[Fugitive]

You could just get Simons gypsy mates in.

[Champ]

Okay. I know I may have insinuated in the past that you're all fucking useless and not worth a blow on an old trumpet but that was all just high jinx. Honest.

 

I'm looking at a house to buy. It's in a location I like but it needs work. I'm trying to work out if the work it needs doing is going to be too steep to offset the benefit of getting it cheaper (possibly £15k under my budget).

 

This might be a bit vague but I'm looking for some sort of decent gauge as to what I should be costing for some various stuff.

 

It'll need:

 

A kitchen

A kitchen floor

Decorating in 3 decent size bedrooms, living room, kitchen (possibly hall/stairs)

Carpet in those rooms.

Possibly doors. There's be 5 or 6 of the fuckers if we did it.

Also possibly needs an upgrade on the bathroom.

 

Tell me if I'm miles off with this:

 

Kitchen: up to £4k for a decent Ikea one?

Decorating: A bit over a grand for someone else to do it?

Carpets: No idea, mate reckons £700 from a good place near him, how much for labour?

Kitchen floor: No idea?

Doors: Same?

 

Also, as an aside. Can I knock a downstairs toilet and the wall through and how much will that shit cost eventually (probably further down the line). I'm reading mental things online that say it's against regulations but that you can do it anyway?

 

I'm just throwing this up here as I'm currently trying to research the lot and know that there's bound to be some clued up fuckers on here to help with that research. Only saw it the other day so still mulling it over.

 

*Shines a big GF DIY light into the night sky*

 

 

Kitchen: up to £4k for a decent Ikea one?

Maybe if you're lucky but if that doesnt include appliances and fitting, unless you're doing that yourself, I think you'll be struggling

Decorating: A bit over a grand for someone else to do it?

Decorating is certainly no 'incidental' cost. I would imagine you'd pay close to this just to have someone do the work for you. Materials would then be in addition to this

Carpets: No idea, mate reckons £700 from a good place near him, how much for labour? To carpet the whole house? Again, I think you're underestimating

Kitchen floor: No idea?

Obviously depends on the size and the kind of flooring but I'd think you could do it for £500

Doors: Same?

Again, doors and their fitting are another thing that cost more than you'd think..heading toward a grand, I'd think

 

And I dont think you'd do a bathroom for much less than £5000

 

Sorry

[Captain]

These things invariably turn out much more costly than you think.

 

Every time.

[Guest ShoePiss]

Stick to renting, you always said it was better to rent anyway.

[Stu Monty]

When the fuck did I say that?

 

Younger me knew so little.

[Liverpool lad]

You got any friends who can help you with shit like this? Builders etc

[TheBitch]

Depends how much of the graft you're willing to do yourself, Stu. Ripping shit out like old bathrooms and kitchens will save you paying somebody else two or three days labour, there's £300+ which is then most of your kitchen floor paid for. Put the floor in yourself, there's another couple of hundred quid saved.

Think of the satisfaction and gripping tales you can tell while quaffing on a nice brandy when it's all done.

Don't agree with a bathroom being £5k either. But then again, it all depends on how lavish you wanna be and where you can save money on one thing, you can then spend a bit more on something else.

 

Decorate yourself, it's a piece of piss. Apart from wallpapering. That shit is for somebody else to be doing.

[Guest ShoePiss]

If you can I'd get a number of general contractors to quote what you want doing before buying and plan on doing all of the demo yourself, smashing stuff with a lump hammer is the best part anyway.

[TheBitch]

If you can I'd get a number of general contractors to quote what you want doing before buying and plan on doing all of the demo yourself' date=' [b']smashing stuff with a lump hammer is the best part anyway[/b].

 

Agreed.

[Stu Monty]

"What you smashing there Stu?"

 

"Knocking it through isn't it, love"

 

*A supporting wall*

[TheBitch]

"What you smashing there Stu?"

 

"Knocking it through isn't it' date=' love"

 

*A supporting wall*[/quote']

 

Hmmmmm... you're not very good at this are you? You work in an office don't you?

[RJ Fan club]

 

Hmmmmm... you're not very good at this are you? You work in an office don't you?

 

Yeah, shits gonna go bad.

 

Stu, never get wrong of a downstairs shithouse. Nowt worse than having to go upstairs all the time.

 

I love my downstairs bog. We've had some good times and will happily do so for many more years.

[Guest The Big Green Bastard]

depends if you're looking to buy to let or buy as your main home.

[Stu Monty]

What depends?

 

I'm buying to live in it.

[Liverpool lad]

We will do a sixty minute makeover on it

[RJ Fan club]

 

Yeah' date=' shits gonna go bad.

 

Stu, never get rid of a downstairs shithouse. Nowt worse than having to go upstairs all the time.

 

I love my downstairs bog. We've had some good times and will happily do so for many more years.[/quote']

 

Fuck knows how the typo got in there. But fixed.

[Champ]

Depends how much of the graft you're willing to do yourself, Stu. Ripping shit out like old bathrooms and kitchens will save you paying somebody else two or three days labour, there's £300+ which is then most of your kitchen floor paid for. Put the floor in yourself, there's another couple of hundred quid saved.

Think of the satisfaction and gripping tales you can tell while quaffing on a nice brandy when it's all done.

Don't agree with a bathroom being £5k either. But then again, it all depends on how lavish you wanna be and where you can save money on one thing, you can then spend a bit more on something else.

Decorate yourself, it's a piece of piss. Apart from wallpapering. That shit is for somebody else to be doing.

 

We thought that when we were getting our bathrooms done but were persuaded to let the plumber (have I mentioned him before?) to let them do it. It took them about 10 minutes.....slight exaggeration but not far off; he knew what he was doing and we dont.

 

However, its not for no reason painting and decorating is seen by some as not such a skilled trade, shall we say; if I can do it anyone can....including wallpapering. Never had anyone in to do that....dab hand with a tin of gloss me

[TheBitch]

 

We thought that when we were getting our bathrooms done but were persuaded to let the plumber (have I mentioned him before?) to let them do it. It took them about 10 minutes.....slight exaggeration but not far off; he knew what he was doing and we dont.

 

However' date=' its not for no reason painting and decorating is seen by some as not such a skilled trade, shall we say; if I can do it anyone can....including wallpapering. Never had anyone in to do that....dab hand with a tin of gloss me[/quote']

 

I suppose two or three days was a slight exaggeration.

[dickie mint]

£5000 for a Bathroom who's your Plummer Super Mario.

[stringvest]

Feel my pain. I'm getting a lot of work done on my house right now. You're probably 5-10K light with your 15K estimate. Depends of course on the quality of the stuff you want to buy.

 

Bathrooms - Victoria Plumb or Victorian Plumbing (it's a Compare the Meerkat type ruse going on there I think) good places to source from. My plumber is charging me £350 per bathroom to fit all the stuff (that's just fitting it - all the other plumbing stuff is separate)

Tiles - it can be alarming how much these cost to buy, so don't go mad with your £60/square metre jobbies.

Doors - if you want paper internal doors these are as cheap as chips - builders pick them up for less than £20 a pop, but proper doors will set you back 5 times that.

Decorating - will cost you a bit more than a grand I suspect - probably nearer £1500-£2000 for a good job.

Also think about the electrics - particularly lighting and smoke/fire alarms. I've just had 96 downlighters fitted - expensive at £35 a pop but with LEDs in they'll cost next to nothing to run.

[Champ]

£5000 for a Bathroom who's your Plummer Super Mario.

 

Ok, it depends what you want to do of course but if this is a place you want to stay in spending as little as possible sometimes turns out to be a false economy.

We did everything when we first moved into ours, spreading our funds thinly over everything. If I had ny time again I would maybe have concentrated my money on certain rooms and tackled the rest as funds allowed

[Liverpool lad]

Dear business this house stuff

[melons]

Also think about the electrics - particularly lighting and smoke/fire alarms. I've just had 96 downlighters fitted - expensive at £35 a pop but with LEDs in they'll cost next to nothing to run.

 

Nearly choked on me oreo there, should have bought a few lamps, could have saved yourself a fortune!

 

 

 

Pretty much agree with what others have said, it can be done but you'll have to call in favours, do a fair bit of the work yourself and compromise on the quality you may have originally wanted. 5k on a bathroom, Cath? Is Pepe there to wipe your bum?

[cochyn]

The Bitch has it right: You can do the bits like (decorating, sealing etc) around the big stuff yourself. New bathroom: £2K absolute tops for parts and proper plumbing. Or do it your self and get to work on the downstairs bog once you've done. You can carpet 3-bed house in beige for £800-£1200 for something decent.

 

Kitchen floor will need leveling with latex compound after you've ripped the old one up. Again, easy and pretty satisfying to do.

 

Don't, for the love of god try hanging any doors though - it's cunt of a job.