Single parent mums

[Elmyn Noos]

Fucking useless.

 

Can anyone tell me why the law is so biased towards mothers getting custody when it is totally clear to anyone with a grain of common sense that if it has to be a single parent situation, kids grow up much more balanced and disciplined with a father rather than a mother.

 

I'm working from home today, and the silly single mum bitch that lives next door to me (renting, of course) is once again completely out of her depth when it comes to controlling her kids, whom I can hear running riot round her as she no doubts whines on Facebook about how their father is late/early/on-time to pick them up again. When I'm Prime Minister, the three options in order of preference enshrined in law will be:

 

a. two parent family, of course

b. custody to the father

c. adopted by the gays

c. children taken into care

d. adopted by wolves/apes

 

Women simply can't cope on their own. Proper rounded parenting is just more thing that they're not very good at. It's not their fault of course - had they been born men they'd be fine. Just bad luck I suppose.

 

Following the steps above, crime rates will drop dramatically, behaviour in school will improve resulting in better results, and the economy and general social well-being of the nation will see tangible benefits. Plus I could concentrate on getting some work done without having to listen to the screams coming from next door.

 

You know it makes sense. Noos-sense. Vote Noos.

[Jairzinho]

I guess the problem is that they're also fucking useless in the workplace.

[Paulie Dangerously]

Useless but automatically get holidays and time off without question. "Don't forget I need all of Christmas off because of little Destiny-Chantelle"

 

How could we forget when you mention your child every 5 minutes?

[Guest davelfc]

Noos, Noos, Noos. Without those kids they wouldn't be able to claim the rake of benefits they do as single mums. Then how the fuck are online bingo websites going to fund their business?

[Sandford]

Fucking useless.

 

Can anyone tell me why the law is so biased towards mothers getting custody when it is totally clear to anyone with a grain of common sense that if it has to be a single parent situation, kids grow up much more balanced and disciplined with a father rather than a mother.

 

I'm working from home today, and the silly single mum bitch that lives next door to me (renting, of course) is once again completely out of her depth when it comes to controlling her kids, whom I can hear running riot round her as she no doubts whines on Facebook about how their father is late/early/on-time to pick them up again. When I'm Prime Minister, the three options in order of preference enshrined in law will be:

 

a. two parent family, of course

b. custody to the father

c. adopted by the gays

c. children taken into care

d. adopted by wolves/apes

 

Women simply can't cope on their own. Proper rounded parenting is just more thing that they're not very good at. It's not their fault of course - had they been born men they'd be fine. Just bad luck I suppose.

 

Following the steps above, crime rates will drop dramatically, behaviour in school will improve resulting in better results, and the economy and general social well-being of the nation will see tangible benefits. Plus I could concentrate on getting some work done without having to listen to the screams coming from next door.

 

You know it makes sense. Noos-sense. Vote Noos.

 

What a load of bollocks!!!

 

Is there some abstract humour to this, that i'm not getting??????

[Guest davelfc]

What a load of bollocks!!!

 

Is there some abstract humour to this, that i'm not getting??????

 

Clearly.

[Sandford]

Clearly.

 

Is it the kind of humour that is unintentional and isn't funny??

[Guest davelfc]

Is it the kind of humour that is unintentional and isn't funny??

 

That depends. Noos is an acquired taste.

[Sandford]

That depends. Noos is an acquired taste.

 

Fair enough. Thanks for clearing that up for me.

[Elmyn Noos]

What a load of bollocks!!!

 

Is there some abstract humour to this, that i'm not getting??????

 

No. I genuinely believe that if the government spent a little more money on getting social care up to scratch, kids should be taken off women if there is no father about until such a time as the woman finds herself a man to help out. I'd put a time limit of say 3 months in care before the kids are offered out for adoption just to encourage her to get her act together, and maybe address the issues that led her to becoming a single parent in the first place.

[Sandford]

No. I genuinely believe that if the government spent a little more money on getting social care up to scratch, kids should be taken off women if there is no father about until such a time as the woman finds herself a man to help out. I'd put a time limit of say 3 months in care before the kids are offered out for adoption just to encourage her to get her act together, and maybe address the issues that led her to becoming a single parent in the first place.

 

 

You have won me over.

 

You have my vote!!!

[Uncle_Meat]

And how is Sayers, Greggs, Farmfoods and the like going to survive without spotty spandex clad single mums and their bean-stained pushchairs containing biscuity smelling scruffy crumb-covered sprogs?

 

Who's going to give me a cardiovascular workout by annoying the tits off me at the post office by spending 25 minutes paying all manner of catalogue bills over the counter whilst I'm waiting to buy some stamps.

 

Or, on the brighter side, who'll then provide the simple cheery humour of an ill-behaved child falling over in the supermarket and hurting themselves? The last one I saw was some scruffy oik careering around the aisle and face-first into a stacked up display of Pepsi Max. Burst into tears, he did. Burst into laughter, I did.

 

You need to see the bigger picture.

 

 

Oh. Wait. No. Fuck 'em.

[Skidfingers McGonical]

Noos and Meat in one thread. It's like being in GF Heaven.

[Guest The Big Green Bastard]

Ar you saying men should change nappies?

 

I can't vote for that.

[Elmyn Noos]

and they're off again next door. Jesus fucking Christ I pay a premium to live in an area that single mums and their feral offspring can't afford to buy in, and the fucker who owns the house next door decides to rent it out - immediately opening the door to the rental market, or lazy thick scum as I prefer to more accurately label them.

 

Even when they're being quiet, which is most of the time, it just disappoints me that they're there -living in a house similar to mine that they plainly do not deserve and shouldn't be in. I bet her poor ex is being squeezed dry to pay for it.

 

Where's the social justice in that? There should be a law that all rental property should be in parts of the city that people like me can easily avoid. The nearest bingo hall is on the other side of town, and we don't have a netto/aldi/poundland Asda on this side of town either. Why would we? We all work, and raise our kids properly.

[Elmyn Noos]

Oh here we go again - she's out hanging her washing on the line, which she will leave there for days, regardless of whether or not it rains.

 

She's clearly just recently split from her bloke as she's not yet going through the slim down and look good phase. I reckon a month or two from now she'll have lost a stone, started spending a bit on clothes, and generally be making the sort of effort she should have made to keep her husband happy, until she gets herself another bloke and she starts on the jaffa cakes again.

[Magic Sponge]

Oh here we go again - she's out hanging her washing on the line' date=' which she will leave there for days, regardless of whether or not it rains.

 

She's clearly just recently split from her bloke as she's not yet going through the slim down and look good phase. I reckon a month or two from now she'll have lost a stone, started spending a bit on clothes, and generally be making the sort of effort she should have made to keep her husband happy, until she gets herself another bloke and she starts on the jaffa cakes again.[/quote']

 

Pictures or G.T.F.O.

[Elmyn Noos]

Ar you saying men should change nappies?

 

I can't vote for that.

 

Change nappies? That's women's work. God knows they have to have some uses.

 

Don't get me wrong, there is a place for women in parenting - it's just that their roles are a lot easier for a man to fulfill if he has to, than the other way round.

[Elmyn Noos]

Pictures or G.T.F.O.

 

Seriously not worth a picture right now. Like I say, newly-split. Give it a couple of months and she'll be worth a pic.

[Magic Sponge]

Maybe the father's climbed on top of your local Waitrose dressed as Buzz Lightyear.

[PestiRed]

and they're off again next door. Jesus fucking Christ I pay a premium to live in an area that single mums and their feral offspring can't afford to buy in' date=' and the fucker who owns the house next door decides to rent it out - immediately opening the door to the rental market, or lazy thick scum as I prefer to more accurately label them.

 

Even when they're being quiet, which is most of the time, it just disappoints me that they're there -living in a house similar to mine that they plainly do not deserve and shouldn't be in. I bet her poor ex is being squeezed dry to pay for it.

 

Where's the social justice in that? There should be a law that all rental property should be in parts of the city that people like me can easily avoid. The nearest bingo hall is on the other side of town, and we don't have a netto/aldi/poundland Asda on this side of town either. Why would we? We all work, and raise our kids properly.[/quote']

 

Buy a house with at least two acres around it and electrified fences around the perimeter. If you haven't done that then clearly it's your own fault

[Elmyn Noos]

Buy a house with at least two acres around it and electrified fences around the perimeter. If you haven't done that then clearly it's your own fault

 

They'd still find a way into the periphery of my existence. They're everywhere you go.

 

Twice in the last few years I've paid an absolute stack to holiday abroad at places I figured would only have me bumping into like-minded well-educated socially responsible families like my own, and both times I've had issues with my kids being picked on by little twats with zig-zags shaved into the side of their heads being non-parented by some useless out-of-her-depth bitch who immediately bleats when confronted about how hard things are for her and her little cuntspit - like I'm supposed to give a shit.

[Lee909]

Sounds like you need a moat.

[Captain Turdseye]

There was a skanky single mum next door to my old house, rough as fuck she was. I was lying in the bath one day and I heard her screaming "JUST BRING THE FUCKING KITCHEN ROLL UP" to her kids.

 

I tell you what love, next time just stick a sign on your front door saying that you've got no bog roll and you were totally unprepared for the shite you've just had.

[Guest davelfc]

Sounds like you need a moat.

 

Unfortunately he shot himself.