Best movie one-liners/quips

[Total Longo]

Probably been done to death, but the Commando thread got me thinking about Arnie's immense library of one liners, and which is the one that makes me chuckle the most.

 

Was Connery the first to bring in the one-liner? I recall the classic "He got the point" in Thunderball, and the "positively shocking" one when he launches the fan into the bath in Goldfinger. Can't think of anyone prior to that doing it.

 

I think my all time favourite is from "Last Action Hero" when Arnie quips "Want to be a farmer?? Here's a couple of acres ", before kicking someone in the plums. Priceless.

[Trumo]

"No ticket!", from Temple Of Doom is a good one.

[Babb'sBurstNad]

[YOUTUBE]EXjfvx-k1Ms[/YOUTUBE]

[RedKnight]

"No ticket!", from Temple Of Doom is a good one.

 

That's from Last Crusade.

[Trumo]

That's from Last Crusade.

 

So it is. What a RiS-up.

 

Anyway, definitely from Se7en, John Doe deadpans "I didn't do that" when Somerset tells Mills he found a dead dog.

[cochyn]

I have come here to chew bubblegum and kick ass, and I am all out of bubblegum.

 

John Nada, "They Live".

[Fowlers God]

Stallone and Willis in Expendables. When Arnie walks in.

 

What's his problem

He wants to be president

[Total Longo]

"I have two words for you...shut the fuck up!"

Midnight Run

[rondeco]

[YOUTUBE]3Jji78uEW14[/YOUTUBE]

[Guest Slim(fast)Shady]

"i'll get you the head....the tail...the whole dam ting"

 

Robert Shaw Jaws

[Rico1304]

Yes, this man has no dick.

[Stu Monty]

There's about five dozen of the greatest ever in Fletch and Fletch Lives.

 

"It takes a big man to admit when he's wrong; I am not a big man".

[Bjornebye]

"i'm a mushroom cloud layin motherfucka, mortherfucka'

 

Jules to Vincent in Pulp Fiction

 

 

I could quote the whole film though to be fair

[Total Longo]

There's about five dozen of the greatest ever in Fletch and Fletch Lives.

 

"It takes a big man to admit when he's wrong; I am not a big man".

 

Fletch rules. "Are you using the whole fist, Doc?" always cracks me up.

[Rushies tash]

"No Mr Bond, I expect you to die"

 

Done to death, but brilliant.

 

Honourable mentions to

 

"I demand some booze!"

 

"Infamy, infamy, they've all got it in for me"

 

"You were only supposed to blow the bloody doors off"

 

"I do this, this, this, this...goal" (not really a quip as such, just like Peles style when he says it)

 

Some not really from 'cool' films, but memorable all the same.

[DanDanShaw]

"Lee: You must take me to see Consul Han right away.

 

Carter: Man, just sit there and shut up! This ain't no democracy.

 

Lee: Yes, it is.

 

Carter: No, it ain't. This is the United States of James Carter. I'm the president, I'm the emperor, I'm the king. I'm Michael Jackson, you Tito. Your ass belongs to me."

 

Rush Hour 1 & 2 are the funniest comedies of all time.

[Bjornebye]

"Lee: You must take me to see Consul Han right away.

 

Carter: Man, just sit there and shut up! This ain't no democracy.

 

Lee: Yes, it is.

 

Carter: No, it ain't. This is the United States of James Carter. I'm the president, I'm the emperor, I'm the king. I'm Michael Jackson, you Tito. Your ass belongs to me."

 

Rush Hour 1 & 2 are the funniest comedies of all time.

 

they are funny mate yeah but nowhere near the funniest comedy films of all time. for m not even in the top 10.

 

life of brian is so far out on its own in film comedies that its doubtful ever to be beaten

 

superbad, knocked up, dumb and dumber, anchorman for me are all funnier american efforts.

[Ezekiel 25:17]

Best not to dwell on Dandans claim there I would say, a couple of others I love;

 

Name's Barf. I'm a Mog, half man half dog. I'm my own best friend

 

Spaceballs.

 

Robert better not get in my face... 'cause I'll drop that Motherfucker.

 

Step Brothers.

 

Shooter McGavin: “I eat pieces of shit like you for breakfast.”

 

Happy Gilmore: “you eat pieces of shit for breakfast?”

[DanDanShaw]

they are funny mate yeah but nowhere near the funniest comedy films of all time. for m not even in the top 10.

 

life of brian is so far out on its own in film comedies that its doubtful ever to be beaten

 

superbad, knocked up, dumb and dumber, anchorman for me are all funnier american efforts.

 

Yeah it was a bit of a big claim. It's one of my favourite comedies of all time, but not one of THE - that's what I meant.

 

Superbad is probably my favourite of all time. But I can't stand Step Brothers, Anchorman or Dumb and Dumber at all. The first two are probably because of my utter hatred towards Will Ferrell.

 

Can't say I've seen Life of Brian, must watch?

[Total Longo]

Yeah it was a bit of a big claim. It's one of my favourite comedies of all time, but not one of THE - that's what I meant.

 

Superbad is probably my favourite of all time. But I can't stand Step Brothers, Anchorman or Dumb and Dumber at all. The first two are probably because of my utter hatred towards Will Ferrell.

 

Can't say I've seen Life of Brian, must watch?

 

Having a bit of a 'mare here, DanDan.

[Mendoza]

[YOUTUBE]q1FS_vKJl8U[/YOUTUBE]

[Ezekiel 25:17]

Jesus, you try to do the kid a fucking favour...

[Total Longo]

Game over, man, GAME OVER!!

[Mendoza]

[YOUTUBE]9H-SC7in8Mo[/YOUTUBE]

 

[YOUTUBE]RelC5QL5m94[/YOUTUBE]

[Stickman]

Off topic but how fit was Sharon Stone?