Management Buzz words

[stringvest]

I think we're all pretty much on the same page on this thread.

[grazywalker]

someone used We are taking the baby out of the bathwater once . Fucked if I know what they were going on about

Also : We have the tiger by the tail . We just have to let it walk .

[Section_31]

I think we're all pretty much on the same page on this thread.

 

That's the mood music I'm hearing.

[JohnnyH]

My director loves to use the phrase "Circle The Wagons". I'm pretty sure he means lets tighting things up during the credit crunch but I'm not 100%. I don't really want to draw attention to myself by asking him why the fuck does he talk in riddles all the time...the bell end.

 

You've never seen a Western movie?

 

Corporate buzz words are no different and no less shite then the 1000 words plebs use for cocaine or whatever.

[Remmie]

I wonder if they bring it into their sex life, I'd be impressed then.

 

Can you action that deep throat you promised, it is a key KPI in your deliverable objectives, I'm looking for growth in that dynamic sexual skill set market. Make sure you touch base and think outside the box. Make sure you swallow, it's vanilla.

[SpeedyG]

Why such an emotional reaction to the arbitrary symbols people use to convey meaning?

[.G.]

I think we're all pretty much on the same page on this thread.

 

Dunno I'm on the second one:whistle:

[Remmie]

Why such an emotional reaction to the arbitrary symbols people use to convey meaning?

English mother fucker, do you speak it?

[SpeedyG]

English mother fucker, do you speak it?

 

Which English gramps? The one of your childhood? Or the one striving to keep up with an ever evolving world?

[stringvest]

Business speak is usually embarrassing and is eagerly pursued and adopted by those with little imagination and less vocabulary. It does have a limited shelf life, however. It doesn't evolve, it changes.

 

Those of you who are old enough may care to think back to the eighties when 'bullshit bingo' came about. Essentially a game played during tedious meetings whereby the winner was the one who could cross most of the words in a matrix filled with random buzzwords of the day. It was the days of 'synergy'. Don't hear that as often as we used to, sadly. From 'synergise' to 'synthesise' to 'socialise', words come into fashion, are heavily used in presentations and speeches by those chasing the businessspeak zeitgeist, and then are quietly dropped in favour of something more 'now'.

 

These are words that meant something before their adoption, and will go on meaning something once the bad suits have discarded them.

[Jennings]

What are your favourites and can you build a whole nonsensical sentence, jam packed with paradigms, soft skills and touching base?

 

Interesting question, but before I address it I will need to mindmap the possible outcomes, in order to see the bigger picture. I will allow the other posters to respond first, to get everyone up to bat. I will touch base with the original poster and keep everyone in the loop. I hope we can uplift progress on this issue to an acceptable level. Once I have formulated an answer I will run it up the flagpole and we'll see who salutes it.

 

Cheers,

 

Jennings (Senior Manager)

[SpeedyG]

Business speak is usually embarrassing and is eagerly pursued and adopted by those with little imagination and less vocabulary. It does have a limited shelf life, however. It doesn't evolve, it changes.

 

Which is pretty much an entire generation right?

 

Those of you who are old enough may care to think back to the eighties when 'bullshit bingo' came about. Essentially a game played during tedious meetings whereby the winner was the one who could cross most of the words in a matrix filled with random buzzwords of the day. It was the days of 'synergy'. Don't hear that as often as we used to, sadly. From 'synergise' to 'synthesise' to 'socialise', words come into fashion, are heavily used in presentations and speeches by those chasing the businessspeak zeitgeist, and then are quietly dropped in favour of something more 'now'.

 

These are words that meant something before their adoption, and will go on meaning something once the bad suits have discarded them.

 

That's why I liked the evolution analogy. KPI is here to stay for example.

 

So your issue is not with the symbols but the people that use them in bad faith.

[mattyq]

Why such an emotional reaction to the arbitrary symbols people use to convey meaning?

 

It's not primarily used to convey meaning , though. That's the problem.

It's used to make the speaker seem cleverer and more 'with it' whilst deliberately confusing those not up with the jargon.

Like the use of acronyms in the various professions. Makes them seem more complex/impressive than they actually are to outsiders.

In reality if basic English was used then everybody would be happier and have more of an idea of what they should be doing

[stringvest]

Which is pretty much an entire generation right?

 

 

 

That's why I liked the evolution analogy. KPI is here to stay for example.

 

So your issue is not with the symbols but the people that use them in bad faith.

 

No, my issue is both with the symbols themselves ("run this up the flagpole and see who salutes" anyone?), and with the people who would rather use a phrase because they've heard or read someone else (mis)use it and they think it will earn them kudos amongst their dullard peers. In good faith.

 

And I bet you in 15 years no plausible individual will feel able to say KPI out loud without blushing.

[hamstrung]

Its unnecessary waffle.

[stringvest]

It's not primarily used to convey meaning , though. That's the problem.

It's used to make the speaker seem cleverer and more 'with it' whilst deliberately confusing those not up with the jargon.

Like the use of acronyms in the various professions. Makes them seem more complex/impressive than they actually are to outsiders.

In reality if basic English was used then everybody would be happier and have more of an idea of what they should be doing

 

I'm really buying in to what you're saying there matty.

[wiiksie]

Stringvest fighting the good fight here.

 

There's another element to this that hasn't been mentioned yet, and its the 'motivational' aspect of these terrible phrases. Its like the words have become a sales pitch themselves, and are intentionally vague and inaccurate like most sales pitches are.

 

Im embarrassed for speedyg for thinking its acceptable to use such phrases.

[Section_31]

Waste, is a thief.

 

[Remmie]

What English gramps? The one of your childhood? Or the one striving to keep up with an ever evolving world?

What ain't no language I ever heard of, they speak English in what?

[SpeedyG]

It's not primarily used to convey meaning , though. That's the problem.

It's used to make the speaker seem cleverer and more 'with it' whilst deliberately confusing those not up with the jargon.

Like the use of acronyms in the various professions. Makes them seem more complex/impressive than they actually are to outsiders.

In reality if basic English was used then everybody would be happier and have more of an idea of what they should be doing

 

Interesting, I'm in the US and I have to admit that the usage is so common that I have an in built filter that tunes most of it out.

 

I agree in general but see a few things differently, I'm in I.T. and I'm sure we can agree that computing has resulted in so many new concepts that language had to evolve to be able to keep track with our new ways of thinking about things. The fact that people come along later and use those words to re-inforce some sort of hierarchy though is a "people" issue, surely.

 

I guess what got me thinking was someone calling "KPI" a buzzword when for me it's a semantically very rich term which is difficult to substitute for.

 

Likewise the "opportunity knocks, create your own door" thing resonates, I've had people say similar and they've meant it. They've understood and meant to communicate the connotations of empowerment, of being proactive, of taking initiative, etc.

 

As SV said language evolves haphazardly but the bullshit tends to get weeded out over time although it sounds like the people using it in bad faith are not culled as aggressively in your neck of the woods.

[stringvest]

What are your favourites and can you build a whole nonsensical sentence, jam packed with paradigms, soft skills and touching base?

 

Interestingly, after a long day's libations yesterday, this morning was packed with paracetemol, soft furnishings and touching cloth. A lot better now though, thanks for asking.

[Section_31]

Do you think the Chinese are fucking around with all this bullshit? Or are they just building loads and loads of skyscrapers?

[SpeedyG]

No, my issue is both with the symbols themselves ("run this up the flagpole and see who salutes" anyone?), and with the people who would rather use a phrase because they've heard or read someone else (mis)use it and they think it will earn them kudos amongst their dullard peers. In good faith.

 

Some sets of symbols are clearly more absurd than others, but let's not be throwing the baby out with the bathwater :smile:

 

And I bet you in 15 years no plausible individual will feel able to say KPI out loud without blushing.

 

But that will only be because we'll be too embarrassed to admit that in the past we thought that reductionism and uni-dimensional measures of a complex system were sufficient.

[stringvest]

I have to say Speedy, the worst culprits by far reside in the US. It's a cultural thing. There's less embarrassment about it there. Just like they have no qualms about using cheesy non-ironic wallpaper in upmarket hotel suites.

[stringvest]

Some sets of symbols are clearly more absurd than others, but let's not be throwing the baby out with the bathwater :smile:

 

 

 

But that will only be because we'll be too embarrassed to admit that in the past we thought that reductionism and uni-dimensional measures of a complex system were sufficient.

 

I hope everyone sees what SpeedyG did there.