kingkenny78

Fuck me they went quick today. On sale from 9am online and in Size? stores, all gone by lunchtime. Lovely trainees like. Breaking mine in now before they get splashed with beer and piss.

Simple 70s/80s televisual test of whether you were cool or a wanker. Tiswas or Swap Shop? Blue Peter or Magpie? World of Sport or Grandstand? Seb Coe or Steve Ovett? TOTP or the Tube? Grange Hill or Murphy's Mob?

Any news yet on the FA's application to UEFA to scrap the pre-match handshake ritual on a 'just in case' basis?

A spicy haggis supper truly is a thing of great beauty.

A Boro lad I used to work with sent me this text after the second penalty the other night: 'That cunt couldn't catch a beach ball in a phone box'

When I was a kid I wanted one of those shoulder holsters that Starsky and Hutch and the Professionals used to wear. Fast forward to the early 90s and I was in some trendy city centre boozer. This cunt comes in and takes his suit jacket off and he's wearing one. With a big house-brick of a mobile phone in it. Thing was, when it rang, he whipped it out lively and then slotted it back in the holster with the speed and dexterity of an old gunfighter.

One of the younger lads at work came back from a stag weekend in Berlin yesterday. His mob stayed at some big hostel and had a great time by all accounts. Apparently, the bar in the place was open all night. He showed us pictures of the boys on the stag on some kinda 'beer bike' thing. Ten of them pedalling in a circular shaped bike contraption with a keg of beer in the middle. The 'barman' was in the middle, steering.

Gambaccini used to bang Limahl from Kajagoogo.

I went to the King Harry for years pre-match. ( when it wasn't having one of it's occasional shut downs ) Dunno if it's still open though as I haven't come in that way lately.

I put paraquat in a fella at work's tea once. Luckily he saw the fungicide.

Wonder if he's phoning some cunt's grandaughter there.

When Joe Pesci and his bruv get battered to death at the end of Casino. Fuckin horrible that.

Every fucker in our end at Castle Greyskull ( when we pumped them 4-1 ) was wearing a variation of that jacket. And that was three years ago. I've had a waxed Barbour Steve McQueen trials type jacket for a coupla years now and it's magic. Ubiquitous even.

Magic player for us. Formerly a fine exponent of the tash. Tight as two coats of paint apparently. Has busy hair. Also has predilection for even busier shirts. Invariably with Harry Hill style collars. Did a decent documentary on the Spion Kop during the South African World Cup. Having never met the man, I neither oppose nor endorse the motion that he's a cunt.

I thought 'Ten Years After' put in a good shift at Woodstock an all.

Always ' the Real Me ' for this old Mod. The Ox's basslines are off the fuckin scale.

'Glen, the two of us need look no moooore. Liverpool's the club you're scoring fooooor. You, skipped past those dozy Blues, You'll make tomorrow's news, And then and only then, We'll love a player like Gle-e-en.' Apologies to the deadest member of the Jackson 5, but my lyrics to that seminal rat-loving smash piss all over his. Anyone's better lyrics tonight win a prize. Really. You have to be in it to win it.

The Sarry Heid, Glasgow. A cold night in the mid 80s. Saw a cunt get stabbed in the throat.

Bruce Foxton John Entwhistle Pino Palladino Horace Panter Mark King

This thread currently neatly dovetailing with it's forum neighbour 'Close Encounters of the Turd Kind'

Some cunt at work keeps leaving shites the size of a Swiss Roll in the traps. They actually poke right up out of the water and he must get off the bog like he's climbing off a motorbike. Enormous. The janitor's rigged up a wallpaper scraper gaffer-taped to a brush shaft to deal with the problem. Poor fucker's having to do the hunt for brown October every day as this fella's regular.

Apparently they all got talking again at Mani's mum's funeral. If the reunion happens, it's going to be the original members doing some live stuff, with the possibility of working on new songs. Magic if it comes together.

'.......and for 24 games he's been sticking it to the Gwladys' ( Smokie )

I was in Asda yesterday and went to buy a 'fridge pack' of ten 440ml cans of Budweiser for a tenner. Until I clocked the even bigger 18 cans pack below it for eleven quid. Apparently a limited edition offer.

I saw a double whammy of cunt behaviour last week. I was sitting in a beer garden with a few of the chaps. There's a car park for a health centre across the road. Anyway this car comes out out of the McDonald's drive thru nearby ( aye, in Scotland a boozer, a Mcdonald's and a Health centre in a hundred yard radius ) and drives into the aforementioned car park. You could see what I guessed was the two fat parents in the front, and three kids between about 5 and 10 in the back. The car badly reverses into not one, but two disabled spaces and it's occupants settle down to their nutritious lunch. A couple of our boys remarked on this by way of ' look at those scummy fat fucks ' or ' lazy inbred cunts '. That kinda thing. After about half an hour it was as if the parents had said: 'Okay cherubs, throw your rubbish out now, we're leaving' as all four side windows opened and an absolute torrent of MickeyD's packaging and leftover food and drinks was dropped out by the whole family. There literally was a large bucket about ten feet from the car an all. And that, as with other posts on here, sums up the situation we have nowadays. Lazy, inconsiderate thick fuckwits bringing up children to be even lazier, inconsiderate thick fuckwits. And that cycle will only continue. Those kids in that motor that day learned that it's okay to park in a disabled space because Mummy's obese and doesn't want to walk too far to the shop for her fags, and it's not a problem to ignore the nearby bin and instead throw all your rubbish and leftovers into the street for some poor cunt,who's meagre wages' tax contribution actually more than likely helped pay for your meal, to come and pick it up.