Geoff Woade

Why do none of them realise it’s easier to let you turn out of a junction first rather than manoeuvre themselves round you, especially on tight turns? The number of Fiat 500’s or Audi A1’s that have nearly taken the paint off my car because they’ve not worked out that tapping the brake to let you out benefits everyone.

I like Rabiot, hasn’t hit the heights but he’s some player him and a proper physical presence. Looks like he’s made the mistake of chasing the money rather than focussing on his career which is a real waste of talent.

Against the odds I put on Mr Inbetween and it was met with grudging approval. Deep down she’s furious as there needs to be an acknowledgment I was correct.

Main reason I hate being bald is having to shave it every 2 days or I look like a half eaten Malteser. The good part is that I also have the type of face that even when I’m happy people accuse me of being fuming and I’m ridiculously tall so look like a Home and Bargain version of Stephen French, thus people tend to stand well clear. Got to enjoy the small things.

Shitty, archaic banter aside, chanting about poverty to people paying 50 quid to watch a football match has always seemed like an absurd irony.

It’s ridiculous. I’ve no idea who is meant to be benefitting from him being sent to prison except for wealthy companies getting their pound of flesh courtesy of the judiciary. I still don’t understand why people convicted of this type of crime get started in the hardcore prisons either.

Difficult one. Keeping him for 4 years will cost the club the thick end of 200 million (assuming he could be sold for 100 million this summer) when you consider not getting the transfer fee and the 20 million plus a year. It’s not as simple as giving him what he wants. That is an unbelievable amount of money for a player the wrong side of 30.

Was literally about to say ‘loveable rogue’. I remember seeing that about some cement head who had robbed someone’s house, nicked their car and then crashed it and and died in the ensuing inferno down a motorway ditch. To give you some idea of the types we’re dealing with; the family decided to have a memorial barbecue at the site complete with the full house music and cans of Carling being poured on the ground classy send off.

Take it from experience, if you feel like that just take the plunge and split up. You only get one life. You’ll be making each other miserable and that’s no way to live. I get on better with my kids mum now we’re divorced and happier with other people and the kids benefit from that. Money is a twat of an issue in general but you can’t let it dictate.

Yep - you get proved right and them out of order and it’s ‘yeah, don’t fucking go on about it’ You get proved wrong and ‘going on about it’ is the only thing that’s on the menu for the next week, and brought up in future arguments.

As a kid the weekend felt over to me when Baywatch came on at 5pm on Saturday afternoon. It was downhill from there. Do remember though that the 9pm on a Sunday show was always good. London’s Burning and The Knock being my favourites. Remember being haunted by an episode of London’s Burning where 2 lads had got on top of a lift, mucking about and then it went up, I’m sure one got crushed in the top and the other fell to his doom. My mum ushered me out the room sharpish. I asked my dad what happened to them the next morning and he just have it the plumbers whistle and he said ‘they’ll never play the violin again’ Still don’t know what he meant.

It’s a hangover from what happens in America. Spoiled, unremarkable people see other people get praise when they overcome genuine challenges. What they then do is invent challenges and ‘overcome’ them in order to gain praise. I could be completely wrong about this and if statistics prove me wrong then I’ll absolutely hold my hands up but I’d wager there is a lot less of this utter tosh occurring in developing countries where people have in general got bigger fish to fry. It was always going to be America that has the monopoly on this type of issue because they seem to have the biggest proportion of vapid, ‘look at me’ wankers.

Article today about the ringleader in the Gary Newlove murder about to be moved to open prison in advance of his release. The other 2 are already out. What a fucking joke.

Why though? It’s so far down the list of priorities at the moment they shouldn’t be afraid to play it back with a straight bat (ooer).

I don’t even know why this is such a big issue that people have to have an opinion on. Why should politicians particularly care about it, statistically the number of people this must actually affect must be seriously low? It’s the same as being harassed about what your feelings are on Morris Dancing, probably not for you but that doesn’t mean you think people should be horrible to Morris Dancers. To be honest they’ve got bigger fish to fry at the moment than pandering to people about such a non issue.

Loads of them. In London pretty much anyone who bought a house before year 2000.

On the 150 rebate - there’s also a discretionary scheme which some local authorities are using to just include band E as well on top of other cases. There is still a lot of unknowns as each authority can set their own parameters but worth keeping an eye on. It’s also been announced that a household can apply for more than 1 lot of the £150 as well.

That never occurred to me actually, I normally use a steak knife to saw through the bottom of the package but I’ll try the lid. I’m meaning the film lid, you strapon - my gripe is with the quality of the film lids and how they don’t peel off cleanly.

Film lids on ready meals that don’t peel off at all or just disintegrate and take about 15 minutes to pick all the bits off. I can grudgingly understand it with a proper cheapy one but when I’m paying 4 quid for a ‘finest’ one, it’s beyond the pale.

He’s great but there’ll be diminishing returns soon you’ve got to imagine. Especially at the end of the next contract. You can’t have a 34 year old whose game is based on pace getting 400 grand a week, most players are finished by then. We’ve had the most of his best years. He might well go somewhere else and be amazing for a year or two but that won’t last and whoever signs him will have paid a fortune in transfer fee and wages.

Could get shot down for this but…..I think that in general women these days are in much better nick than they used to be. I’m aware that it will come across as sexist but it’s all about the praise. A lot more now seem to take a lot of pride in their appearance, nails / hair done, nice clothes, get down the gym etc. Looking back at pictures from the 80’s and 90’s or watching shows like this is England and most of the lasses were proper ropey. Even the ugly ones now can at least use filters on their pictures so they don’t seem as rough. (I’m not counting a lot of the mums who do the pick ups from my kids school, some of them could frighten a police horse)

To be fair, he’s admitted he’s wrong and taken it very gracefully. Definitely comes out of this with his reputation enhanced. Seems a great lad!

I think part of the issue is they can’t be given a good beating. The punishment tends to be less than the crime these days. I sometimes take a quick look at the ‘jailed this week’ in the echo to see if there’s anyone I know and the sentences just seemed massively random. Beat someone to a pulp whilst already on a suspended sentence for something similar and have plenty of it on your record - enjoy a 6 month holiday, import some untaxed cigs and it’s goodbye for the next few years. Priorities are ridiculous in this country, I’d happily see that lot who were doing that to that kid shot. It’s a guarantee they’ll live pointless lives just causing misery to anyone else unfortunate enough to be in their orbit.

Camel