brucespanner

Shut the fuck up Donny!

I've been at a lady friends house all weekend and she is a massive foodie, hence no fucking crisps! Anyhow's I've got a long train journey today and needed some company, so I opted for Co-op Sea Salt and Chardonay Vinegar, fuck.ing.hell these bastards are good. Go get some, now.

Just got the call, women are so fucking predictable!

Both the female leads were grot film 'actors' it's just porn with a narrative beyond a balding middle aged bloke turning up at some strumpets house with a spanner looking to 'fix' the plumbing. Shite.

It's really fucking shite, cheap sensationalist shite.

I was at the pub from around one yesterday, drank enough to put navvies to shame, 'forgot' I'd promised to turn up at a lady friends house to satisfy her sexual whims, now she's refusing to see me today...bonus, I'm going for a dirty fry-up, a couple of pints by the canal and then I'm going to watch Commando whilst eating Hobnobs in bed, she'll realise the error of her ways later and make the call, women!

FULL STORY The world will feel their military might!

It's £4 fucking 80 a pint at my local, good beer, but scandalous prices.

Hahahahaha! You're from Wigan!

No. The only reason the UK has Labour governments is because of the Jocks, without them we are Tory by a landslide.

'That was the sexual equivalent of lying in the sunshine' Anon, this morning.

She is quite frankly amazing from tip to boot. As you were.

She is quite frankly amazing from tip to boot. As you were.

Or you're just a useless, unpractical CUNT?

I know, I was just being facetious, I took some friends on an unofficial tour of the filming sites, they only twigged when we reached The Two Windmills. Ended up having a fantastic night with some Argentines on the stairs near the Metro station where she leads the blind fella through the street.

Interior isn't though, that's a set dickhead! Don't you dare question my intimate knowledge of Audrey/Amelie, I have a court order proving I know more than most.

I've been, lost my copy of Candide in there, which through sheer happenstance I'm going to replace today.

Couldn't think of anywhere else, fuck you!

Negged for not only being a cunt, but for being a massive cunt, that's a fucking shite analogy and totally disrespectful, fuck off!

Did you put sugar in their tea again and forget to wipe the surfaces down? Proper irritates women that does.

For funding 'Withnail' alone George gets my vote.

No. Negged.

You see the luck I've had could make a good man turn bad.

I've had a fucking awesome weekend, just saying!

Wrong answer Zig!