Teasmaid - The Liverpool Way Jump to content


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About Teasmaid

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  1. Teasmaid

    Do you like Christmas?

    Bubble and squeak, now you’re talking my language. It’s too often overlooked in these northern parts. I thank my 50% cockney genes for my love of fried mash and cabbage. Can I add, in my defence, I wouldn’t even expect the buggers to cook the whole dinner. I’d be happy if they offered to peel a bag of spuds and make breakfast.
  2. Teasmaid

    Do you like Christmas?

    For the first year ever, I’m going on strike on Christmas Day. Every year I spend the whole week before organising, shopping and stressing. Christmas Eve is like a mad mash of Masterchef and DIY SOS, peeling veg and preparing stuff. I’m already knackered by the time I drag myself out of bed on Christmas Day to open presents (briefly) then it’s straight into the kitchen to make a full English for my enormous tribe. If I’m lucky I’ll find ten minutes to jump in the shower and throw some clothes on before I immediately get the Christmas lunch on. I’ll cook it single handedly, usually for 10-12 people, then sit down to eat with them. They’ll all look glam as fuck, while I’m a frazzled, sweating mess with hair like Boris Johnson and no make-up on. And so it continues for the rest of the day... So this year I’ve told them there’s going to be no Christmas lunch. I’m going to relax and sit down, eat chocolate, drink and watch shit telly. I’ll do a buffet of ready-prepared stuff, but there’ll be no cooking. My husband is completely supportive and thinks it’s a great idea. The kids on the other hand are organising management talks with the unions. No words can describe their horror and disgust. I don’t give a shit; the bloody lazy, expectant, millennial bastards.
  3. Teasmaid

    Missing (posters) in Action

    How are you doing? I still lurk from time to time, but I’ve impressed myself today with my ability to remember my password. Obviously not quite as demented as I’d feared!
  4. Teasmaid

    Back to the future day

    My older brother always says he was born 30 years too early. He spent his formative years getting the shit kicked out of him at school for liking things that are cool nowadays.
  5. Teasmaid

    Back to the future day

    To be fair, I'd rather shag the dog than Tom Hanks.
  6. Teasmaid

    Neville and Giggs - good deed.

    That's just what the Daily Mail would have you believe. There are homeless charities in London that are so stretched they've resorted to giving people an all-day bus ticket, so they can ride the buses through the night. At least they'll be warm and dry, but there is nowhere to put them. Many homeless won't use hostels because they get robbed and beaten up in them. They prefer to live on the streets with their homeless friends who have their backs. Some hostels will only let them stay for a night or two, and they have to find the money to pay for them first. They're not gifted help on a plate. Like any service, you need to have the tenacity and the mental capacity to fight for help these days. Often these poor people have neither.
  7. Teasmaid

    Neville and Giggs - good deed.

    I see where you're coming from, and to be fair to Ratty he has said he'll try to help them find alternate accomodation come February, but at the end of the day, they're not responsible for Manchester's homeless population any more than we are. Maybe we should all do more to lobby Manchester City Council to sort their shit out. The problem there is so prolific now, more in your face than in Liverpool or even London. It's a fucking travesty, and we should all do our bit.
  8. Teasmaid

    Back to the future day

    What next, Turner and fucking Hooch day? Id like to go back. Back to a time when Wednesday was just frigging Wednesday, not 'suicide prevention day' (surely every day should be suicide prevention day!) or breast cancer day or Back to the Future day. Why does every day have to mark something? We all loved Back to the Future, but surely we can like shit without being a bandwagon jumping cunt. Just shut the fuck up, you irritating, juvenile pricks. PS. I don't give a shiny shite if you've booked Star Wars tickets either. Do it fucking quietly.
  9. Teasmaid

    'App Birthday Champs

    Happy, happy birthday, you lovely lady. Hope your birthday is as splendiferous as you are! xxx
  10. Teasmaid

    Forgotten Foods

    Nibbits Wheelz. Wheel shaped crisps that came in a massive bag, and cost 10p in the kwikky. Them were't days.
  11. Teasmaid

    Hot tubs

    Am I the only person that automatically pegs hot tub owners as swingers? I went to the ideal home show recently, and there were hoards of people round the hot tubs. They all looked like wrong 'uns. Dirty bastards.
  12. Teasmaid

    iphone cases. Why?

    After forking out for 3 replacement screens within a month, my husband bought me a case for my iPhone that is supposed to be used on building sites. It's about a cm thick and made of rubber. I could drop it out the bedroom window and it would return, intact.
  13. Teasmaid

    House fixy-uppy shit

    Only when my drinking 'ed-is-on.