mister_lizard

Mrs Heisenberg: "I can't find the car keys." Mr Heisenberg: "Maybe you know too much about their velocity."

Best comment ever. Should be tweeted and retweeted to fuck. They wouldn't have needed a dead Welsh tramp either.

Hatem Trabelsi failed a medical at Liverpool....

One of the Guardian's football writers, Rob Smyth, quite happily gave an interview to this website a couple of years ago, at a time when the Heysel merchandise was being sold. Charming.

They should erect a statue of David Moores outside Old Trafford, or at least whoever it was who thought the right man to lead Liverpool into the 21st century would be a shit-thick, inbred Freddie Boswell clone who was born into his money and not done a day's work in his life. In the late 80s we were the most powerful club off the pitch as well as on it - when the biggest players in England moved (Barnes, Beardsley, Houghton, etc) it was to us. Then along comes Freddie, and whether through incompetence, arrogance or complacency, proceeded to sit on his hands for 15 years while the world revolved away from us. Sure, ferguson is an abhorrent, toxic, cancerous freak - whose comments in the past 48 hours hopefully suggest the decline into madness has finally kicked in - but he just had to look after his team whilst Moores allowed ours to deflate like a shit balloon. Being asked to hold up a mosaic for him on the day Fowler played his last match was a disgrace. And when he had one shot to put it right, he took the Texan blood money. How was the private Lionel Richie gig, you cunt? And somehow, there he still is, turning up for matches, apparently oblivious. I sometimes wonder if he's so thick he just doesn't understand what he did to us, or so thick-skinned he doesn't care. The cunt.

How long did we chase Mark Gonzalez for?

Probably unfair on him, but my most vivid memory of Mike Marsh is him getting a standing ovation after being sent off for cutting Dmitri Radchenko in two. Sly little bastard deserved it though, if only for making us have to watch David Burrows play in goal in the previous leg.

My niece is in his class at school and hasn't stopped crying for two days. We didn't want to let our kids go to sleep last night. Just horrible - how can parents cope with something like this? Some idiot at work trotted out the "he's with god now" line today and I had to walk away or I would have lost it. I swear if I ever get rich Claire House is going to see a chunk of it.

Do the FA cup runners-up get a Europa spot? I'd assumed we'd have a horrible scenario where we need manu to win the final to get us into Europe (I'm assuming citeh will fuck up today or crumble in the semi).

Lawton is a ridiculous, pompous cunt with his head so far up his own arse he can lick his teeth clean from the inside. Every time I see the photo accompanying his articles I want to grab him by the fucking throat and point out to him - forcefully - that he writes about fucking games for a living.

If I were Titi Camara, I might be mildly pissed that Leyton Maxwell got mentioned in this thread before me.

The prospect of a two-year whore-off between Fat Cunt and Bent Cunt for the England job is a truly miserable one.

Derren Brown on neuro-linguistic programming: "NLP is a communication tool that blends aspects of Behaviourism and Chomskian Linguistics into a highly evangelical package. It has built around itself a rather creepy scene and in a rather dubious and unchecked way has become a massive industry in the worlds of trendy management-training and alternative therapies. Having trained with the highly likeable founder of NLP, I find it a mixture of sensible and appealing methods for dealing with low-level pathologies such as phobias and fears on the one hand, and sheer daft nonsense and massive rhetoric on the other." So while it's sensible to consider the power of language, the big claims made for NLP are up there with homeopathy and reiki - bullshit pseudo-science trumpeted by hideous, braying young professionals desperately looking for something that will give them an 'edge' as they attempt to fuck everyone around them for an upgrade on their Audi and cuntish new age wankers wanting some new magic clothes to dress up in and prance around feeling all warm and smug and superior and initiated into the hidden secrets of the universe. I don't think it's going to help with Hicks.

Jesus fuck. You'd trade in your marriage for that? Fucking mong.

The cake is a lie.

If I wasn't a lurking shithouse with no ammo I'd rep you for the fucking weirdest football/French horror porn analogy I've ever seen. Personally I'd go for us being the retirement home singer getting bummed on a table with all the pigs squealing in Calvaire, or possibly Monica Bellucci in that underpass.

Cunt

Down to the beach, I fear.

Everyone on here knows that article is shite. Oliver Holt knows that article is shite. It hasn't been written to provide insight, understanding or even opinion. The sole reason that article has been written is to attract web traffic. Newspapers sell fewer copies these days as lots of people get their news for free off their websites, so they have to make money from them. They don't charge for access (yet), so they make their money from advertising, and the more people navigating to the site, the more they can charge. Loads of articles these days are empty, 'controversial' bullshit, but people post links to them on discussion boards, others navigate to them to see what all the fuss is about, and the papers are happy. Unfortunately, everyone who's clicked on that Mirror link has justified Holt's writing it.

We played Heskey and Le Tallec up front once in a League Cup game against Bolton. We lost.

Guardian website's also currently running a slideshow of Rafa's transfer flops, for the second time in about three months. Needless to say, we're still waiting for one featuring Taibi, Veron, Bellion, Kleberson, Djemba-Djemba, Miller, etc. I know that as a Liverpool fan you've always got the paranoia fairy sitting on your shoulder when it comes to the media, but the Guardian certainly seems to have an agenda. (See also what appears to be the editorial decision to persistently shovel the phrase "£26.5 million" into any reference to Torres, even though you only arrive at that figure by wrongly combining his transfer with Garcia's). Still, what do you expect from a paper that employs as one of its chief football writers Rob Smyth, a journalist happy to give interviews to the kind of Manu fansite that also sells merchandise celebrating Heysel?

Hatem Trabelsi four or five years ago. Apparently his knees were about to explode as though they were the result of a testicle-based negroplasty. He went to City instead and played about three times.

You can find this guy's Facebook page by searching for Scott Red. Interesting. Also found this: RoM Interview With Journo Rob Smyth Rob Smyth is one of the Guardian's main sports writers, currently doing the over-by-over coverage of the Ashes on their website. Seems that in his spare time he's happy to associate himself with the kind of bigoted scum who celebrate the violent deaths of football fans for personal profit. Wonder if he's got one of those t-shirts? BTW, you can email Rob directly during his stints on the Guardian's OBO coverage....

On the subject of Utd players singing that song: Last September Oliver Kay wrote a piece for the Times objecting to what he saw as the increasingly aggressive and abusive nature of songs sung at football grounds. Strangely, he took as his starting point our fans singing "2-0 to the murderers" at Goodison. When a lot of Liverpool fans objected to this on the website on the not unreasonable grounds that this chant was a response to abuse hurled our way, Kay wrote a follow-up piece clarifying his points, which as far as I'm aware only appeared on the website. He was at pains to stress that he found all abusive songs objectionable, and, in passing, made a brief reference to unnamed United players singing "we won it 3 times" as they celebrated on the pitch in Moscow. Needless to say, the comments section rapidly began to fill with people (including myself) asking for further details, like names, and asking why this had never been reported before. Within two hours, while the article remained, the section mentioning United's players had been deleted, as had all reader comments referring to it. It's difficult to avoid being paranoid about the media if you're a Liverpool fan, but it's also difficult to avoid the following conclusions: 1) British journalists knew what the United fans were singing - surely Kay wasn't the only one? 2) They chose not to mention it. 3) When one of them did, 4 months later, it was immediately censored. Any guesses as to what the reaction would have been if the captain and Carra had been singing about Munich inside the Ataturk? Here's a link to Kay's altered article (I'd recommend not reading the comments section if you don't want your blood pressure going through the roof on a lovely spring morning): TheGame - Times Online - WBLG: Merseyside vitriol: Oliver Kay responds Here's a link to a rawk thread which has the text of the original article and highlights the differences: Oliver Kay responds (Merseyside Vitriol part III) (Sorry - don't know how to post articles) Back to permalurkage now - sorry to butt in but the thought that some of the players who behaved like that in Moscow will be wearing black armbands and keeping their heads down in fake sympathy makes me feel a little ill.

http://football.guardian.co.uk/Observer_Match_Report/0,,1868917,00.html It's not so much the obvious nature of the guy's allegiance that gets me - though you might well think such transparent bias is out of place in a supposedly objective national newspaper - but the sheer, staggeringly piss-poor quality of his writing. Both witlessly feeble and shamelessly pretentious, I suspect this piece wouldn't have made the cut for a school magazine. Quite what a Guardian sub-editor was doing waving it through is beyond me. My favourite bit is where he shovels the word "synchronicity" in at the end to show everyone how clever he is - using this word in a football report would be a case for the Idiot Police even if he knew what it meant, which he doesn't. At all. If this is what it takes to get paid employment at a national quality paper these days, there's hope for us all. O_o