Jennings

I got a set of Calloway Big Bertha irons on ebay....pretty cheap. Can't remember exactly how much....I think around 80 quid.

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Hahaha...pissing myself at that. That is pure comedy gold. Funny on about three levels.

2 years. Prior to that I was posting on Est1892. It was a little slow on there, so I tried my luck over here. Not long after posting my first post on here, there were about 15 replies. They were nearly all abusive. I thought this place is active and the banter is good- that'll do. These are the only forums I use. I don't post very frequently - but I love reading the discussions, particularly the GF.

Foxy foreign spy: I'm going to be completely useless to you. Roge: I'm sure we'll be able to lick you into shape.

I'll be setting record and getting a pack of man-size tissues ready.

All of us? What about James Bond. If you called him a pussy he would pistol whip you with his Walther PPK, then shag your sister.

Chris Moyles did a 51 hour show. What's funny about that? His 2 hour show isn't funny, so how does making it 51 hours suddenly make it funny.

I like the one on the left. Maybe a side issue but I don't like the Adidas stripes on the shoulders. All red.

Looks to me like they have a 'puppet state' over there. Haha..Puppet...etc... ...ZZZzzzz...taxi.

Jeez....these losers are giving us proper bullies a bad name!

Can I play? I am 42, fat and shit.

I am going to pray for god to stop her praying.

Just be yourself....I am sure you will end up on telly ....on the news.

The portuguese make timewasting the spectacle and football a sideshow once they are ahead.

Congrats!

A...ahem...friend of mine contracted one of these ailments. He made an appointment at the STD clinic at the local hospital. Only when he turned up did he realise that he didn't know where abouts the STD clinic was. In fact the hospital is split over several sites, so it was possible he was not even in the correct building. Anyway, he confidently strode up to the enquiries desk. An elderly gentleman was performing the role of receptionist. "Hello", said my friend. Let's call him Dennings. "Hullo", said the old gentleman in a far back and aristocratic accent. "Can you direct me to the STD clinic?" Denings whispered, trying to keep his voice down, as there was an electrician working on the fire alarm system not far behind the elderly gentleman. "THE WHAT?" said the elderly gentleman cupping his hand to his ear. "The STD clinic?" said Dennings still quietly. "STD!" yelled the elderly gentleman confused. The electrician dropped his scredriver and coughed as though stifling a laugh. "Yes." Said Dennings "It stands for sexually transmitted disease." "OH. I THOUGHT YOU MEANT STANDARD. I WAS THINKING...STANDARD...STANDARD...WE DONT HAVE A STANDARD CLINIC." he laughed loudly, "YOU WANT GENITO-URINARY. That way." The electrician had left the room by now, unble to control his coughing. And a queue which had formed behind Dennings all appeared to have caught the cough, as Dennings dejectedly walked past, head bowed.

I have been tossing all round the kitchen - you wanna see the mess. Lemon and sugar. Maybe syrup.

nay oiled

It looks a bit like the second time he goes down, he is trying to make it look like Stevie pushed him.

Nani McPhee

If this was on the GF there would be tons of photos by now. FF disappointment.

Are you Nige's ex?

When I skim the gravy I put the oil down the sink.

I once flew up a tall building and rescued a female news reporter from a crashed helicopter.