Da Bitch

:sick: pickled ....nah yuk not keen on boiled eggs only way I can eat them if they are put with chopped liver or egg mayo (preferable with lots of garlic!! yum)

Guys lets face it the ONLY reason men are funnier than women, Is because making her laugh is the only way your gonna get in to her knickers unless you go hunting in the her lingerie draw!!

Congrats & good luck

I've never shit myself well not since I was an anklebiter, I leave that to my other 1/2 that's his forte after a skinful the amount of undercrackers he goes through we have to buy them in bulk from Primarks! I've done a SKI though:lol:

Hell I work for them & I don't rate the shite!!! the tomato & mascarpone is just as bad!

My family always had cats, my mum's current one is called Georgie it was my younger brother who named it after George Graham (yep the little shite is a gooner), use have one called Fuffy Jackson!! mum used the last name of an old primary school teacher of mine!! (don't ask why!),she had to be put to sleep as she had cancer, next cat was dumped on our door step she was called Tabby, why? becoz it was the only name the little sod would answer to!!, my great aunt had a cat called Sally named after my nan,irony is the cat was the most anti-social f#%ker you could find, the total opposite of of her namesake.

That's just evil....:laugh:

Should have taken a sledge hammer to it, it's a lot more satifiing & the coppers won't bother you. I feel like taking a sledge hammer to the shelf scan checkouts at work they're a f#$king nightmare!! :wallbutt: but alas at 15 a grand a pop one can't afford to do so!!! Not unless by some miracle I win a large amount of money on the lottery, but there is more chance of me getting to snog Mikel Alonso than that ever happening!!

Smoke & Shadows by Tanya Huff

I think it was A Man Called Horse

Had that a couple of weeks ago I was eating.......a pawn pasta salad it broke part of the tooth & took out the mid of the filling, mind you I think that the absess I had was part of the reason for the break, had to have the tooth out as the dentist couldn't fix it good job it's at the back!!!

Loved the look on Hugh Dennis face

The Bank Job - Cracking film

Don't give a shit hate facial hair on men full stop!!!

sometimes I like my job, but lately I'm getting pissed off with it, In the process of look for another one. Also if I didn't have to pay bills I'd say to my company shove your poxy job.

Are You Being Served ( can't forget Mrs Slocombes pussy can we??) Keeping Up Apperances Desmonds

God I'm feeling old reading this thread, I remember listening to Tony Blackburn, trying to fool kids in to thinking he had a dog in the studio!!! here are some song I remember Chirp Chrip Cheep Cheep - Middle Of The Road Puff The Magic Dragon - can't remember who did that Camp Granarda - think it was Terry Scott Never Mind The Aggro - The Barron Nights

The Bucket List - 9/10 for a tearjeaker it's quite funny The Shepherd Border Petrol- 3/10 usual no brainer, only watched to drool over Jean- Claude Van Damm

The Bucket List excellent film supposed to be a tearjeaker but it was quite funny & was very thought invoking, makes you think of all the thing you want to do but A) you put off OR B) don't have the courage to do 9/10

yes that is my daughter, wouldn't put a pix of me there as I am a Minger as Ezekiel tactfully put it!!!

don't you think there would be blood by the time the Gallagher finish with him!? :whistle:

No I mean a proper pix of him & NOT who he would like to be in his (wet)dreams!

No that my daughter, let see a pix of you so I can insult it or are you so FUCKING UGLY that even blow up dolls run & hide!!!? :telloff::notamused:

How about spite roasting? OR put him in a room with the Gallagher bros!!!

I agree with Cosmo about customers, I work in one of the Sainsburys Local this is a small store (about 20 colleague not all working at the same time) th store has 3 manned tills & 4 self serve ones (S/C/O), some of the fuckers!... sorry cutomers we get in are in jobs that require then to use computer yet these twats can't / won't follow simple instruction given to them on the S/C/Os, Becoz we are small between 9:30- 12:00, we don't man the normal till (unless these's a sudden rush) all the staff are replenishing for the lunch period, this one woman thought she be a bitch after I refused to man a till & serve her (was trying to hold a fucking shelf up at the time!), I told her that at this time we don't man the tills as we replen, the cow then threw her shopping at me,( I decided to get in to uber bitch mode) I asked her if she thought stuff was put on the shelves by the replinshment fairy!! also just be coz I wear this uniform doesn't give her the right to abuse me , She then said I'm going to complain to your head office I DEMAND to know your name!!, I glared at her & said go ahead, but see that copper over there?? I'm gonna get him to come & nick you for assault as it's on CCTV ........ HOW's THAT MADAM!! ( said ith vermon) the twat backed down. This thurs we had a power cut, the pwer had just come back on & the manned tills were still rebooting ( S/C/Os have a battery back ups), this snotty twat ARE you going to serve me!! Me: Sorry sir you will.... TWAT: Are you refusing to serve me? ME: I can't serve you sir .. TWAT: I'LL ask YOU again are YOU refusing to serve me?? ME: will you NOT interupt me when I'm trying to tell YOU that the till HAVE NOT rebooted YET!! SIR.. TWAT: Oh!!!